


Tell me who I am.

by HoweverElis



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:53:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 48,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23313442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HoweverElis/pseuds/HoweverElis
Summary: Christen is a successful woman, focused on her role as CEO of a company she dedicates all her time to. Feelings are the last thing on her mind but meeting the right person doesn't give her much choice.Letting go is not that easy. Tobin Heath is not that compliant.
Relationships: Ashlyn Harris/Ali Krieger, Tobin Heath/Christen Press
Comments: 314
Kudos: 875





	1. That was enlightening.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey!  
> As some of you may or may not know, I'm Italian so the quarantine gives me a little bit of time. I actually started this story a while back and it's pretty different from my last one. Again, English is not my first language so please be nice and let me know what do you think about it...I hope you enjoy it! Thanks everyone, PLEASE BE SAFE!!! 
> 
> (Tumblr: spiriti-puri)

"Good morning Miss Press"

"Good morning Ali. Can you tell me today's schedule?" She replied with a kind smile

"Sure. Conference at 3:00 pm with the international brand we're collaborating with and meeting with the new operations  
manager at 5:00 pm"

"Okay perfect, thanks!"

"No problem boss!" she smiled and kept taping on her laptop 

Christen entered her office and put her bag on the desk while sipping her coffee. It was a pretty boring day at work, nothing too stressful, so she decided to just reply to some e-mails and wait for the conference in a couple of hours. Christen never really stopped working anyway. As soon as she was out of the car and in her apartment after a whole day of work, she was having tea and plan the next day of work, checking out the progress of the day, re-reading the emails she had sent and the one she still had to send. Everything needed to be under control. It's not like she didn't trust her colleagues but reading everything twice, couldn't make any harm, right?  
At 2:50 her secretary knocked.

"Come in!"

"Miss Press, conference in 10 minutes" Christen didn't even look up, instead she kept her eyes on the screen while taping words after words.

"Already? God..." She looked up and smiled "Thanks Ali, you're a lifesaver" 

"I knew you'd get too caught up with work and lose perception of time... like always" she responded teasingly , watching Christen stand up and taking her laptop and bag with her.

"You know me too well." She winked at her and made her way to the conference room. 

After almost two hours of documents, numbers, discussions and agreements, she was absolutely destroyed. Her headache only got worse once she realized how much work she still had to do. How stupid it had been to think this was gonna be a nice and smooth day. She set down in her office and signed. Just as she was downing some medicines for the headache, Ali knocked again.

"Miss Press, the new operations manager is here"

"Let her in" she said, before a beautiful woman entered the room smiling widely. 

Christen stood up and offered her hand. "Hi and welcome to the company! Christen Press."

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you in person Christen. Tobin Heath" she said, shaking her hand and never breaking eye contact. There was a moment in which they just stood without letting go of the other hand and just smiled, probably getting used to see the other as actually a human being and not only a picture on a curriculum or image on a screen.  
They set down and before Ali could go out of the room Christen spoke with an amused smile and raised eyebrow

"Ali, didn't you have an anniversary to celebrate?"

"Ehm... Yeah, but I still have work to do and I didn't know is it was fine for me t--"

"Ali, I already told you it was." she replied with a sweet voice 

"I know! But...well, I know It's a complicated week with meetings and stuff and it's not neces--"

"Alexandra Krieger! Get out right now!"

"Are you sure? I can wait if you need me." she said with a serious tone and blushing slightly at being called out about it

"I'm your boss. I'm serious go, I'm sure I'll survive the rest of the day without you even if it's gonna be hard" she winked and smiled watching Ali laugh softly and nodding

"Thanks boss. I'll see you tomorrow. Bye Tobin, it was nice meeting you!" 

"Same here!" the newest member of the company replied, waving her hand before turning around and facing Christen again. She was smiling lightly, happy that she had just witnessed this interaction and happy that all the voices about Christen's kind nature were truthful.  
Christen was looking down, reading the few points she had to discuss with Tobin about the management of the company and collecting the documents she needed to give her to sign, when she started.

"So...Of course you already know what this company stands for and what we expect from you for the next years but I still want you to have a clear idea of how the person before you, managed it all." she looked up and gave some papers to Tobin before continuing, taking a pen and pointing at the chart on the first page. "As you can see, in February and March there was quite a--"

"I'm sorry to interrupt you Christen but I already have this documents. I asked them to the old operations manager so I could know what was and wasn't working" she replied, looking in Christen's eyes again with a smile and making her naturally smile in responds

"Oh...Good. Okay, yeah". She didn't know why but the woman in front of her made her immediately feel comfortable. Maybe it was her friendly smile or her kind eyes but she felt it. She gave some documents to Tobin and let her sign them before taking them back.

"Well, Miss Heath. You're official part of the company! How do you feel?" She asked, smiling from ear to ear  
Tobin just looked at her, smiling at how beautiful and genuine that smile was before replying "Good! I'm exited" she stopped and turned serious all of a sudden. Before Christen could ask what was happening, the woman spoke "I have a request. A very important one." 

"Of course, tell me"

"You have to call me Tobin." She said, trying her best to stay serious before breaking into a wide smile.  
Christen just laughed and nodded, relieved and amused by this request "Okay Tobin. Well, I guess you can call me Christen"

"Oh, are you sure? Your secretary calls you Miss Press" she replied with a smirk

"Ugh, don't remind me, she's one of my best friends and she's convinced that calling me Chris isn't professional" she added quotation marks with her fingers to the last word.

"Well I hope you don't think I'm unprofessional" she said, while standing up and gathering her things

"Uhm... We'll see Miss He-- Tobin" she said smiling and getting up as well. "All jokes aside, I'm sure you heard about how I like to work and expect my co-workers to behave. But at the same time, whatever issue you have I want you to feel free to talk to me about it, okay? I want this company to make you feel at home and I'm sure all the workers here are gonna help you with that, okay?"

Tobin just smiled at her and replied "Thank you. I appreciate it."

They made their way out of the room together, side by side, talking mostly about work. The CEO was showing her around and introducing her to most of the workers of the company and their role. Tobin would often crack a joke and shake hands confidently, with a wide smile on her face. Christen liked her energy, she could already tell the woman in front of her was extremely intelligent but also easy going and fun to have around, and it was exactly what this company needed.  
Tobin on the other hand, found herself lost in those green eyes more times that she would like to admit. She was a beautiful, strong, smart, and obviously very successful woman but she could feel how, deep down, she was hiding her true self. She wanted to get to know more about that part of Christen, the one she didn't show right away. It might sound unprofessional but Tobin didn't even think about it that way. She was just star-struck, she couldn't help it.  
After a while, when they stepped out of the building, ready to part ways and go in different directions Christen spoke

"Well, it was a pleasure meeting you. I'll see you tomorrow Heath" she waved, but before she could turn around Tobin smiled at her and corrected 

"Tobin"

"Right, Tobin, sorry"

"No, it's fine. Thanks for everything boss" she said with a wink

"You can call me Christen, I already told you, it's completely fine for all the workers to call me that, I don't-- " then she saw the woman's expression and realized she was just teasing. She looked down blushing slightly. "Very funny Heath". Tobin laughed and shook her head, eyes fixed on her.

"See you tomorrow Christen. Good night." she said finally, turning around and walking towards one of the cars parked outside of the building. Before she could go in she stopped and looked back, watching Christen getting inside her car and driving away. Tobin smiled to herself, thinking that this woman carried something with her, something different.  
She didn't realize just how much she would end up wanting to find out tho.

A couple of days after, Tobin knocked on Christen’s door and entered with a bright smile  
“Good Morning boss”

The CEO looked up and a wide smile appeared on her face “Hi Miss Heath”

“I thought we already talked about that…”

“Well, apparently not enough since you're still calling me boss, which I hate by the way"

Tobin laughed and nodded "Okay fine, Christen. I just wanted to...mh, well..."

Christen immediately saw the woman's discomfort in her eyes. It was actually weird watching her look so shy and unsure. They didn't have a chance to talk alone since Tobin's first day there. Usually, she let new employers get used to the new environment and people and Tobin seemed already part of the group. Her easy going nature and funny character charmed everyone after... well, only the first day, really.  
She gave her a minute, watching her look down and trying to find the words before she spoke, pointing to the chair in front of her, to the other side of the desk.

"Sit down, Tobin" 

After Tobin set down, still blushing and still insecure, Christen spoke again softly, just above a whisper, paying attention to every single word that left her mouth, to make sure Tobin was comfortable in her presence.

"Tobin I already told you that, whatever problem you have, you need to be open and honest with me and I can promise I'll do the same" she waited for the woman to look at her and when she did, Tobin felt already better, reading in those green eyes, nothing but sincerity and understanding.

"It's...It's nothing really but well, I'm new and this afternoon there's my first meeting with anyone and well... I guess, I just wanted to know how your meetings usually work" She was confident in herself and in her work. She knew she was good but she also knew that she never really worked in L.A. before, so she wasn't sure about the dynamic of the company yet.

Christen looked relieved that this was the question and that it was a very easy answer.

"Just be you."

"Yeah, okay, what does that mean?" Tobin said smiling and rolling her eyes at the woman's reply

"It means that everyone express their ideas in their own way. And every single idea matters. If someone suggest something and you know that it wouldn't work, feel free to stand up and explain why it's not a good idea and what would the consequences be"

"Okay so... Like, I can just say it?"

Christen laughed at her surprised face. "Yes"

"Okay, sorry, I know it sounds like I never worked in a company before but I usually had zero voice in it. They told me what to do and I'd try my best to make it possible even if I thought it wasn't a good idea"

"Well, we're different." 

"I'm glad to hear that" she stood up and smiled at the woman. Every doubt completely gone. Her mind focused on the other's beauty, kindness and confidence. After a few seconds of eye contact Tobin smiled teasingly "Thanks boss, that was enlightening."

"You're welcome, Miss Heath!" Christen replied, laughing when she saw the woman roll her eyes and walking through the door with a smile on her face, trying her best to look annoyed but failing. Christen shook her head and got back to work on her laptop, still smiling at the woman she barely knew.

The meeting went well. Tobin never worked in a company that worked that well. Everyone was giving an opinion without judgment and listening to others the same way. Everyone was also realistic about what was the right choice. Everything made sense and the atmosphere was nothing but positive. Of course, Christen Press was the amazing motor of how things went down, always smiling yet confident and strict when she needed to be. Tobin was amazed everyday more by the woman.  
The day was over for everyone and some of them decided to go out since it was the last day of work before the weekend. While walking outside, Tobin noticed that Christen wasn't there, so she looked at Ali and asked

"What about Christen?"

Ali smiled at her "She isn't coming."

"Why?"

"She never does."

"Why?"

Ali laughed at her before stopping and looking at her "She's still working. I don't think she ever stops."

"But it's Friday."

"Doesn't matter to her"

"I'm gonna ask her anyway" Tobin turned around and walked towards Christen's office before Ali could say anything else.  
She knocked on the door and when she entered, Christen was closing the laptop and putting it in her bag.

"Oh perfect, we're going to the bar, let's go."

Christen laughed and shook her head "Sorry Tobin, I have some work to do"

"What?? It's Friday Christen."

"It doesn't matter." she laughed louder at Tobin face before walking past her and opening the door. Tobin stepped in front of her and closed the office door again.

"Are you teasing me or...?"

"Nope" she opened the door again and walked out "Have a good night, Miss Heath" she said in a playful tone.

Tobin watched her walk away before going back to Ali and the others. She didn't know why she was so bothered about it. It wasn't even about her not wanting to go out but the tone and the words that she and Ali both used that made her feel weirdly annoyed, like her absence to the night out was obvious. Like it couldn't happen. When she walked back Allie spoke first

"Oh, here she is, finally. Let's go!"

They started walking before Tobin walked beside Ali again but it was the dark haired woman that spoke first, after a sign

"Beginner's mistake, T"

"What do you mean?"

"Christen is very dedicated to her job. She's a perfectionist and when she finds time to spend with her friends, she always makes sure is not on a work day." she shrugged. They walked for a few seconds in silence before Tobin replied

"Well, I'm sure she came with you guys al least a couple of times, right?" 

"Never in two years."

"What?" she asked with an incredulous voice

"Yeah, they all love her, obviously, but they know her job is her priority." she shrugged again which made Tobin laugh

"What do you mean by “they”? She doesn't hang out with people from the company?" Her smile disappeared at the woman's simple answer

"Yeah, pretty much."

"What about you then?" 

"I knew her before the company, Tobin. Way before. So our group of friends outside this company didn't change at all and never will." She said, touching her shoulder with a kind smile, before they arrived to the club and walked in with the others.

Apparently getting to know Christen Press wasn't gonna be that easy. Fuck.


	2. Does it matter?

"Good Morning Ali!" 

"Hey Tobs, what's up?" She replied, not looking away from her laptop. 

"Nothing really, is Christen busy at the moment?"

"I don't think so. Go ahead." She smiled at Tobin and kept working without wasting any time.

The woman knocked on the door and waited for Christen to invite her in. After entering the office she stayed silent, mouthing a soft 'sorry' while the CEO kept talking at the phone with whoever was on the other side. Tobin set down and started to look down at the papers in her hand that needed Christen's approval and she couldn't help but listen to the conversation the other was having. She was the one that invited her in the first place so she wasn’t intruding .

"Oh wow, that sounds awesome!" the woman nodded with a smile so bright that made Tobin wonder who made her that happy. She wished she had that ability as well. She smiled naturally and looked back down at the papers before hearing the next words.

"I really needed that today, I honestly can't wait!" and a few seconds later "I love you too, I'll see you tonight okay? I have to go, bye." Christen smiled and looked at Tobin who suddenly looked uncomfortable. It's not like she was bothered by the younger woman being in a relationship, she barely knew her on the personal level and yes, she could admit from the last three weeks of her working there that their good chemistry was awesome but only on work stuff. She had no reason to feel the way she was feeling. But she couldn't help it anyway. She spoke in the moment their eyes met.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt anything important."

"Oh, you didn't! What do you have there for me?"

"Documents." she responded. Christen thought she sounded pretty mad but didn't say anything about it. Maybe she just was in a bad mood and it wasn't her business. They are coworkers. That's it. So she smiled and thanked the woman, reaching for the papers. Tobin didn't move and instead kept looking at her so Christen spoke.

"There is something else or...?"

Tobin could say no and leave because that was, in fact, the right thing to do, but something she couldn't explain made her brave enough to stay and reply.

"No, actually, it's just weird to hear you express feelings. I didn't know you had any." She smiled and winked, letting Christen know she was just teasing. From the time she was there tho, the two did nothing but tease each other, always joking around in this not-too-unprofessional way, so she didn't need the wink at all for that. Christen, of course, couldn’t help but respond.

"Well, you were wrong Miss Heath. I just express them to who I want and not just anyone." She raised her eyebrow and smiled, watching closely to see the woman reaction.

"Well whoever has the pleasure to see that part of you is very lucky, boss." 

"Are you saying that my professional part sounds like a bitch?" she said playfully.

Tobin started laughing and shaking her head. "No! I didn't said that."

"You said you didn't know I had feelings."

"Well, you are not that personal around here."

Christen stopped smiling at that and looked in Tobin's eyes, talking slowly but surely, without sounding angry. "That's because this is my job and I work hard for this company. So I'm very good at letting the person in front of me see just the side of Christen they need to see." She smiled kindly.

"I mean you can be professional and still take a coffe with a coworker."

"I don't think so."

"Why?" Tobin pressed. She didn't know why she wanted to know so bad but she did.

Christen just shrugged and smiled sweetly, with an expression that said 'that's just the way it is'. Tobin smirked and kept going.

"So, if I want to take you out for coffee, what do I need to do, boss?"

Christen was looking in her eyes and she knew that even if they were just joking around, she was one hundred percent waiting for an answer. She really hoped she wasn't blushing when she replied, sounding as confident as possible.

"I'm sorry, not a chance."

"Really? Not even a little one?" She asked, raising her hand with a little space between her thump and index. Smirk still there on both of their faces.

"Well, since you work here, nope."

"You are rejecting a date with me just because we work together?"

"Date? No!" she laughed and shook her head. Actually she was liking the idea, maybe more that she should so she tried to hide it and push back those thoughts. They are coworkers. 

"Oh come on, that'd be a great date, right?"

Christen gained some confidence and lined closer, putting her elbows on the desk and looking straight at her.

"You are not used to women saying no to you, huh?"

"Nope." Tobin kept eye contact and a small smile, feeling like she was about to hear a yes by the beautiful woman in front of her. Heart beating out of her chest loudly. 

Christen bit her lower lip before shrugging and looking away, relaxing against the chair again and taking the papers on the desk in her hands to read them.  
"I'm sure my boyfriend wouldn't like that very much, would he?" she said, not meeting Tobin's eyes again.

The older woman face fell. Christen was so fucking good at teasing her, she didn't see that coming at all. She stood up slowly, thinking that Christen definitely won that round but she wasn't gonna show it.

"I don't know, ask him and let me know." She winked when Christen looked up at her and walked out.

Christen put the papers down and couldn't help but laugh. Tobin Heath was something else, that for sure.

The rest of the week continued smoothly. They were all busy, doing meetings, going back and forth, taking care of every little detail about the next step of the company, so when Friday came they were all pretty ready to relax a little bit and put work aside. Christen made her way out of the office and set beside Ali.

"I need some sleep." she said, putting her head on the woman's shoulder.

"Yeah, tell me about it." Ali sighed and kissed Christen's head. "This was a crazy week, huh?"

"Yes, I'm glad it's over."

“Me too.” They stood up, ready to leave when Ali spoke again. "Oh, tomorrow movie night at your place, right?"

"Oh shit, yes! I forgot." She laughed and nodded. "You are becoming my secretary in my personal life as well."

"Well, if you didn't think about your job so much, you wouldn't need one." the woman said while they started making their way out.

"I know, I know but I can't help it."

"Well I think you should let yourself go a little bit more. We all think so."

"I know."

"Because we love you."

"I know!"

"And we want you to be happy."

"I know that too!" They were both laughing now while joining all the others, standing outside of the building, ready to hang out. Christen kissed Ali's cheek and whispered a "See you tomorrow" before leaving her side and speaking to everyone else.

"Bye guys, have fun!" Everyone responded and weaved. As she weaved back and turned around, a voice raised among the soft "Bye, Press!" and "Thanks, you too!". Of course it was Tobin's voice.

"Miss Press, You aren't gonna honor us with your presence even after such a hard week?"

All the coworkers got instantly used to the teasing between the two over the last weeks, so they just rolled their eyes at Tobin words and laughed. Christen turned back around to face the group and replied smiling without getting closer.

"My week hasn't ended yet, Miss Heath."

"Well, end it with us." she replied with a challenging look. Christen laughed at that and got closer, putting a sweet hand on Tobin's shoulder and said

"That's very kind of you but I think your presence just ruined any chance of ever joining the group." She winked at the others and walked away, hearing the laughter from all the employers.

Tobin just shook her head and accepted the teasing by them all. She loved it too much to stop playing around with the woman. The where both strong and determined woman with a similar personality but opposites attitude towards life, that's why they got along so well so soon. Everyone that had eyes could see that they were an amazing duo on the work place and could easily be also outside of it.

When they arrived at the club and quickly ordered some drinks while sitting down, they were all talking about random stuff, just relaxing after the crazy week they had. At some point everyone was talking animatedly about something Tobin didn’t care to know. She was actually listening but without paying so much attention, she was just tired and really needed some rest. All of a sudden Allie noticed her lack of responses in the conversation and called her out for it.

"Hey Tobs! Do you miss Christen that much?" She asked with a playful smile. She was obviously joking and deep down used that line to understand if Tobin was okay. Tobin nodded with a serious face.

"Yeah, I'm so used to have her on Friday nights with us." she said laughing along with the others. She shook her head and said the words she knew Allie really wanted to hear. "Sorry guys, I'm exhausted."

"Yeah, we get it. I think Christen was the only one smart enough to go to sleep." The blonde said, taking another sip of her drink before Ali spoke next.

"Christen? Sleeping? Oh please, she's probably still working." She said with in a knowing voice.

Tobin looked around and saw that the three of them were now the only ones left at the table, probably too tired to go around the bar, so she asked Ali a more personal question

"Does she really work that much?"

"Yep."

Tobin nodded and looked around before she spoke, looking down at her drink like she didn't care about the answer she was about to recieve. "And how is she when she isn't working?"

Ali smiled and looked at Tobin's face. If she noticed a blush she didn't mention it. "She's great. A great person, a great friend..."

"A great girlfriend." Tobin said. She looked up and met Ali's eyes. She didn't mean to say that out loud so she tried to play it cool and look around the bar.

"Well, I don't know about that. She hasn't been with someone in so long." the dark haired woman responded.

Tobin immediately looked up at her with a confused expression, trying to understand if she was making fun of her. She laughed slightly. "What do you mean? She has a boyfriend, right?"

Ali looked at her before laughing and shaking her head "Boyfriend? No!" She pushed Tobin's arm with her elbow, like she just said the biggest joke. Tobin was so confused by it all.

"Christen doesn't have a boyfriend?" She asked again.

"No, why?" Ali said simply.

At that question, Allie jumped in with a teasing tone "Yeah, why Tobs? Does it matter?"

"N-No, not at all, just curious." She said while finishing her drink and putting the empty glass on the table.

The conversation shifted to other topics but Tobin couldn't stop thinking about it. She actually laughed to herself and shook her head at being played so easily by the woman. Oh, she's good, she taught, she's really good.


	3. I'm very hard to please.

The two don't get a chance to talk alone for a few days. Christen is actually pretty busy and so is Tobin. Sure, they work together so they see each other pretty often, but they don't talk about anything that is not work related and only with a professional tone, no teasing, no jokes, no funny conversation. It's a delicate moment for the company and Christen is too focused to think about anything else. Christen slightly misses Tobin's way of always putting a smile on her face.Tobin slightly misses Christen's laugh and the excitement in hearing it. It's none of them fault really, they just didn't have the time. Well...until now.

"What are you doing here? It's raining!" 

"Oh really? Didn't know that." Christen responded while standing outside of the building, under the rain, looking for the phone in her purse.

"What happened?" Tobin asked.

"Nothing, my car is unfortunately dead." 

"You should call your boyfriend." She said smirking, once again putting a smile on Christen's face when she looked up at her. They stayed there a couple of seconds, looking at each other, wet clothes and tired faces.  
Christen finally found her phone and dialed a number, before bringing the phone close to her ear. Tobin then looked at her with a questioning look.

"Who are you calling?" 

"Boyfriend." She said with the sweetest smile.

"Who are you really calling?"

"A cab."

"For?"

"Going back home?" Christen said like it was obvious. Tobin just signed and shook her head.

"Come on, I'll take you."

"No, thanks really I do--"

"Christen." She took the phone from her hand and closed the call before anyone could pick up. 

"The rain is getting stronger, which means there is so much traffic right now that your cab is gonna take forever to come here and even more time to take you home. Beside, I'm already completely soaked and so are you." 

And with that she just started walking towards her car and waited outside the passenger seat for Christen to go. Christen was too tired to fight so she just signed and set in the car when Tobin opened the door for her, laying her head on the window and closing her eyes. Tobin was worried and couldn't stand watching the woman being totally worn out and ready to sleep. She asked for her address and it was pretty far away too so she tried to make conversation and make the younger woman smile since she was good at that.

"How was your day?"

"Good, thanks." Christen replied, turning around and watching Tobin drive. She was a very beautiful woman, nothing new there, but the way she was driving with confidence, one hand on the middle part of the stirring wheel, the other casually laying on her lap, made her look so attractive. Christen was also very tired and forgetting that Tobin was a coworker and she should stop thinking about that. So she turned around again but not before Tobin caught her eyes.

"You look tired."

"You do too."

"I am." Tobin replied.

Christen actually felt bad. "I'm sorry if I'm keeping you from going home. I know my house is far away and I can call a--"

"Christen, don't worry about it." Watching the younger woman still tense, she added "Besides, you don't have a boyfriend to call so..." She shrugged and laughed when the woman rolled her eyes.

"How do you know I don't have one?" she asked with a smile, quickly realizing that she didn't tell her it was a lie.

"I have my methods."

"Okay, creep." She laughed.

"Says the liar."

"I'm not a liar."

"Yes you are, Mrs Press." she replied nodding like a little child.

"I was just teasing you and the look on your face that day made it totally worth it."

"Is it so?" Tobin looked back at her right and saw the woman nod while stopping at a traffic light. Christen felt the woman staring at her and turned around to meet her eyes.

"What?"

"Nothing." She shrugged one shoulder "You look really beautiful today." she said simply.

Christen scoffed and shook her head, looking out of the window again. Somehow the action irritated Tobin.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"What Press?"

Christen looked back at her and laughed humorlessly "Tobin I'm tired, I sleep 4 hours at night, I just ended a way too long day at work, my make up probably looks like shit and I'm soaking wet. So no, I don't look beautiful right now and I don't even care. No need to lie about it." She finished, turning around again and closing her eyes. Tobin wanted to argue back but stopped, hearing the frustrated tone in the woman it was obviuous she had just crossed a line. She knew it sounded like she was hitting on her but it wasn’t her intention at all. She was just being honest, she really thought Christen looked beautiful in that moment and why shouldn’t you say something positive and true to someone that deserves it? After a few seconds of silence, trying not to sound offended she just mumbled 

"Well, I really meant that. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable, sorry."

Before turning on the radio and letting it playing softly. Christen knew she sounded like a bitch. The woman was stuck in traffic just to take her home, she was being nothing but nice and still Christen was treating her like shit when that was literally the last thing the woman deserved. She signed and looked at her hands. She knew she had to be the one to break that awkward silence in the car since it was her fault it existed. 

"I'm sorry Tobin, I didn't mean to be rude. I'm tired and annoying." 

"You're always annoying." She replied with a wink after a few seconds.

"I know that." she laughed.

Christen relaxed a little bit at that and kept the conversation going and like at work, everything was easy with Tobin. Just laughter and jokes. She wished she could be as chill as the older woman was, just to know how that felt like.

"So, did you call a mechanic for the car?"

"Yes, I texted a friend. He'll check it out tomorrow probably."

"I can give you a ride at work tomorrow morning." Tobin said without hesitation.

"No, thanks. Ali will pick me up."

"Oh, almost forgot. Coworkers are the devil for you." She said laughing at Christen fake-gasping expression. The CEO slapped her arm without hiding her smile.

"That's not true."

"Come on! You litterally lied about having a boyfriend just so you could decline my invite for a coffee."

"Who makes you so sure I'd go out with you if we didn't work together?"

"You wouldn't?" She looked back at Christen with a challenging look. The woman just shook her head and looked away, feeling herself blush without a reason. "So?" Tobin insisted.

"Maybe?"

"I'll take it." She winked and decided to let it go. "So how isn't this beautiful, smart and annoying woman in a relationship?"

"Because she doesn't want to."

"Really? Wow, I'm so shocked about it, I don't even know what to say." Tobin said teasingly with a monotone voice, obviously expecting just that and making Christen laugh. "Why don't you?"

"I...I don't have time. It might sound stupid but I worked so hard to be where I am. And when I'm in a relationship, I'm not as focused." she shrugged. "It doesn't make me sad or happy. I just know my limits and I made a choice before starting this company."

"I get that. I thought the same for a while after I graduate college and settled in. But the truth is, I'd love a family, you know? Everytime I see my sisters with their kids, I can't stop myself from wanting it too."

"Wanting what? Kids?"

"Yeah, sure, I'd love that. But maybe, even more, someone to come back home to." In that moment she realized that she is saying all of those things to Christen Press, so she laughed with her eyes still on the road. "I must sound so stupid to you, right?"

"No, you don't." Christen whispered and smiled. At one point she wanted that too. Now, she just doesn't think about it. Her career meant to much to her. There was a weird tension in the car, brought maybe from talking about such a deep topic while stuck in traffic after a long day at work. "So why don't you have a girlfriend, Mrs Heath?" she asked raising her eyebrows.

"I'm very hard to please." She teased back with a shit eating grin, causing the woman to laugh hard and she just lost herself watching her with a smile. She sure as hell was beautiful, even with fucked up make up and tired eyes. Just beautiful. They talked the whole time until they finally arrived at Christen's house.

"Thanks for the ride, Tobin and for making me laugh." Christen said, sounding genuine and surprisingly shy. 

"It was my pleasure, Chris." They stayed in silence for a while and before Christen could open the door she slowly took the woman's cheek and pressed her lips on the other one for a few seconds. Tobin didn't actually expect that so she froze in place, heart beating out of her chest at the simple gesture. 

"Good night, Heath.” 

“Good night.”

As soon as Christen entered the house, Tobin sighed and closed her eyes unaware that the younger woman did the exact same thing, resting her head on the front door she just closed behind her back and asking herself what the fuck was happening to her.

The next morning Ali picked her up. 

“Hey Chris.”

“Hi Ali, thanks for taking me to work today.” She replied, kissing her friend’s cheek after closing the car door.

“No, problem. What happened to the car?” Ali asked while driving away.

“No idea! Nima is coming to check it out today. Hopefully nothing too bad.”

“I’m sure it’s nothing, Chris. Don’t stress about it like I know you’re going to.” 

Christen rolled her eyes and signed but she was actually smiling at how much her friend knew her. Ali smiled back and asked.

“So your car is still at work?”

“Yes.”

“So…Who drove you home last night?”

Christen paused for a few seconds before responding. “Heath.”

“Oh…”

“What?” The CEO asked watching the other woman wide eyes and surprised expression.

“Nothing. I wasn’t expecting it.”

“Yeah, she saw me standing outside and it was raining so she offered me but then I told her I was calling a cab but again, it was raining and it was already pretty late so I—”

“Chris, Chris, slow down, okay? A coworker gave you a ride. Nothing wrong with that.” She stopped before biting her lip and adding “Besides, Tobin is super cool. You guys could be such good friends.”

“We’re coworkers, Ali.”

“I know that, Christen.” Eyes still on the road. “It’s not that important if you don’t want it to be.”

Christen stared at her, mouth hanging open but no words coming out. After a while she asked “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing, just…You could create a…um…Deeper relationship with her and it would be totally fine.”

“What is this coming from?” when they stopped at a traffic light Christen took gently the woman’s chin and forced her to look at her.

“Christen, come on. The two of you eat each other with your eyes.” She said like it was obvious.

“No, we don’t Ali. We are coworkers.” She was the one to look away now. Ali started driving after seeing the green light and said

“So? You have too many stupid rules. You’ll end up loosing something you really want in your life just because of them.”

“Like what? Tobin?” she laughed humorlessly.

“Yes.” Ali answered with a serious tone.

“Who said I want her in my life?”

“The way you act around her, Chris. The way you guys act around each other.”

“How do I act?”

Ali didn’t say anything after that, just shook her head and ignored the question which irritated Christen even more. Her friends knew her and knew how important her job was. She was professional 100% of the time at work and she would never let her attraction for Tobin ruin that. She just needed to stay away from her and stop their teasing, hopefully without anyone noticing. The rest of the car ride was silent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! I hope you're having a good day and hopefully staying at home. I don't know if I'm totally satisfied with this chapter but oh well...Let me know what are your thoughts about it! Thank you, bye!


	4. Only then you'll have my forgiveness.

The next two week were a little bit less busy but not at all less relaxing. Tobin was getting more and more frustrated at Christen lack of interaction with her. It wasn't even about the absence of teasing and jokes that annoyed her but the absence of everything else. She was acting like the older woman didn't exist either as a coworker or a human being. She would avoid any type of conversation and never met her eyes. Tobin actually thought about that car ride over and over again, maybe looking for something that made the woman offended in any way but she couldn't really find anything. She shouldn't be so upset about it, in the end that's Christen Press we're talking about. Ali noticed that awkwardness too when one time Tobin made a joke about how full of coffee addicts this company was and everyone laughed about it except the CEO, who instead just walked out the meeting room without even looking at the woman. Ali knew exactly what was happening.

"Christen Press, that's enough." Ali said busting in her office after seeing Tobin walk out with the saddest look for the 10th time that week.

"I don't know what are you talking about." She replied not looking up at her.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about, Christen."

At that she looked up and closed her laptop. "Ali, please, this has been a crazy day already and I--"

"No, now you're gonna listen to me. If you think that by ignoring Tobin you're being more professional then you're wrong. Actually, you're being the total opposite. You can't even look at her and the others employers are starting to feel awkward everytime the two of you are in the same room which is quite often since, jut like you always fucking specify, you're coworkers."

"What am I supposed to do?" Christen almost screamed. "I'm trying to do the best I can for the company and last time I checked, I've always been good at that, huh?"

"Yes, you're good at that but there's no need to shut Tobin completely out just because you're scared you could have feelings for her."

"I don't have feelings for her!" she said firmly. "I don't even know her that much."

"Well, if she's just a coworker then treat her like one. She works hard for this company like everybody else and she doesn't deserve your shitty attitude." and with that the woman walked out.

Christen just signed and covered her face with her hands. She wasn't ignoring Tobin. She just thought that maybe being a little more distant would be the best choice for everyone. Being away from her after spending almost everyday getting along perfectly fine on the professional and personal level was harder than she thought it would be, so she just decided to act like she didn't exist. It was killing her even if she didn't want to admit it, not only because she missed being in a good mood but also because Ali was right. Tobin didn't deserve it and nothing had happened for her to act like that.   
She decided to keep working and eventually solve the mess with Tobin the following week since it was already Friday. 

A couple of hours after Ali knocked.

"Hey Chris...I'm leaving."

"Sure, I'll see you tomorrow night." she said with a kind smile.

"Chris... I'm sorry about before, I didn't mean to raise my voice and not while we were working b--"

"Ali, no. You're right, I shouldn't be acting like that." She signed and looked down. "I'm going to fix this."

Ali just saw the defeated look on her best friend face and opened her arms. "Come here." Christen stood up and hugged the woman. "I love you, sweetie. Always, okay?"

"Love you too" she kissed her cheek and pushed her off laughing. "Go have fun instead of hugging me and making me emotional."

"You love my hugs, Miss Press."

"Shut up." 

They waved at each other and Ali left. After only half an hour Christen had an awful headache so she decided to stop working and leave too. She was making her way out when she saw through the open door that Tobin was still in her office. She stopped and looked at her. She was looking down, pen in her left hand close to a paper, probably ready to write down some important part of the document she was reading, while following the words with her right hand index. Watching her so focused only made Christen feel worse. She knocked softly on the door and Tobin looked up.

"Hey Christen, do you need something?"

"No, not really." Their eyes met for the first time in more then two weeks and they were both getting used to it again. Like when you go to the beach after living in the city for months. You know how the sea looks and smells and moves but being there, again, after a long time, it almost reminds you how feeling the sand under your feet is pretty different than just remember it. You have to get used to it again.

"Okay..." Tobin kept looking at her, trying to read her.

"Can I come in?"

"Are you sure? Sitting in a room with a person you barely talk with sounds pretty unpleasant for the both of us." Tobin said, finding the strength to stop gazing in those green eyes and keep writing down.

"Okay, I deserved that." Christen said. It was the first time ever she didn't saw a smile on the woman's face and knowing it was her fault made her a little braver. She walked in and set on the chair in front of Tobin. She waited for her to look up but it didn't happen. After a few minutes Christen was getting bored so she just decided to try and make the woman laugh, just a little bit, to ease the tension. She took her laptop from the bag and set it on the desk. She knew Tobin was trying her best not to look up and even if she did, it looked like they were just working in the same room but on different things. She opened the email and started typing. After a few seconds, Tobin laptop rang with a new mail from Christen Press: _Miss Heath, did you know you're absolutely horrible at pretending to be working in order to ignore me?_ Tobin read it and tried her best to stay serious but she just couldn't, she wasn't expecting that at all so she automatically laughed. 

"That's not funny, Press."

"You're laughing." she responded with a smile.

Tobin just shook her head not looking up and kept 'working' with a small smile she couldn't repress. Christen just signed and took the pen from her hand. 

"Come on Heath, I'm sorry okay? I didn't mean to ignore you."

"Then why did you?"

"I just...I didn't really ignore you, I was just...Trying to be more professional."

"Professional? Chris, we've always been professional. That was just you being rude to me for no reason." She stood up and tried to take the pen from the woman’s hand but she moved the hand away so Tobin set down again with a sign.

"Okay, I'm sorry I acted like a bitch." She said honestly.

"Okay."

"You forgive me?"

"No." They were lightly laughing at the interaction like teenagers with their crush.

"Come on! You just called me a bitch and I ignored you a little bit! We're even."

"I didn't call you a bitch!"

"You didn't deny it." 

Tobin just shook her head and pressed her lips together to contain her laugh. "You ignored me for more than two weeks, we're not even at all!"

"That's in the past! Let's forgive each other." 

They were both laughing loudly and if someone saw them right now, they'd probably think they were either drunk or completely crazy. After the laughs died down they stared at each other with soft smiles on their faces. They both missed this.

"Okay." Tobin whispered, knowing there was no way she could stay mad at the woman in front of her.

"Okay." Christen smiled, giving the pen back to her.

They talked for a while and then stood up to walk out together.

"Hey, It's Friday. Why aren't you at the bar with the others?"

"Didn't feel like it. I also had some work to finish." she said, watching the woman nod in response.

Suddenly Tobin stopped walking and took Christen arm so they were face to face. She had the biggest grin on and Christen was a little confused by it so she asked

"What?"

"You really want me to forgive you, right?"

"I'm already forgiven, remember?" she answered with a smile and a cute one shoulder shrug.

"Not completely."

Christen signed and rolled her eyes. "What do you want, Heath?" 

"A drink."

"What?"

"I want a drink. Wine, specifically."

"Okay, I'll give you a bottle of red I lov--"

Tobin laughed and shook her head. "No way, Miss Press. I want a glass of wine and your presence. Only then you'll have my forgiveness." 

Christen looked at her, understanding what she meant. She knew that saying yes was against her rule but Tobin had that stupid smile on her face and Christen did act like a bitch for two weeks, so she decided to make a little exception, not admitting to herself that she wanted to spend time with the woman every chance she got.

"Fine Heath." She signed and walked out with a small smile that gave away how much she wasn't really annoyed. 

  
They decided to go with Tobin's car and then eventually she was going to drive her back to her car before parting ways and going home. Tobin brought Christen in this little bar with woods tables and little lights around the ceiling. There was an entire wall full of bottles of wine and the other wall was actually a floor to ceiling window that showed a part of the garden with some more tables and candles around. Christen liked this place a lot. It was totally her style, a quite place with soft relaxing music playing in the background and lights to contrast the dark wood that covered the forniture.   
Tobin walked in and held the door for Christen, she waved at a young man with a long beard that was behind the bar counter and that nodded with a wink in response and walked straight to the wall with the bottles.

"Let's see...You like red?"

"Y-Yeah, usually." She responded a bit hesitantly. "Shouldn't we wait for someone to take that?" She asked, pointing to the bottle already in Tobin's hand. 

Tobin smiled and shook her head "This is one of my favorites. It has the right balance of tannins and acidity to compliment the dry nature of the wine without being too much, you know?" She said when she met Christen's eyes again.

"I don't know...To be completely honest with you, I have no idea what you’re talking about."

"Okay, just trust me."

"This place is beautiful, Tobin."

Tobin nodded with a smile and pointed to a table. "Sit down and get comfortable."

She walked away and came back with two glasses of red, putting one in front of Christen.

"Thanks." The green eyed woman said shyly. She was nervous and she didn't even know why so she just took a sip before saying anything stupid.

"What do you think?"

"Oh wow, that's really good." 

"What about this one?" Tobin asked handing her the other wineglass. Their fingers touched on the thin neck of the glass and in that moment their eyes met. They both looked down, trying to ignore how unrealistically intimate that felt.

After tasting it she nodded with a smile. "That's very good too." She looked up at Tobin. "I'm sorry, they taste the same to me." 

The woman in front of her just started laughing, throwing her head back. "Chris! They are completely different."

"I don't see it." She shook her head smiling while sipping the wine and watching that beautiful woman laugh.

They spent more then three hours, talking about Christen's family and then Tobin's, along with their passions, sports, music tastes. Tobin was loving every single minute of it, watching how the woman's eyes got wide when she talked about something exciting and fun from the past or she would take a sip everytime she wanted to hide her smile at Tobin's stories. This was the real Christen. The one without worries and rules, just pure joy and freedom.   
They walked out and set in the car before the CEO looked at her with a confused expression.

"Tobin, we didn't pay!" she said in an almost panicked voice.

"We don't need to."

"Why?"

Tobin locked the seat belt and started the car without meeting the woman's gaze. "Because I own that place."

Christen stared at her profile. "What?"

"I'm one of the owners. This place is one of the reasons I moved to L.A. actually."

"Oh." Christen looked in front of her. She wasn't expecting that but again, Tobin was full of surprises. This night, the way she could just talk to her about everything, the way Tobin listened to every word and the way she'd tell stories about when she was younger, about her nephews, about her siblings, everything about this night, felt so good it almost scared her. It totally scared her.   
The car ride was full of laughter and teasing, their chemistry present and undeniable. They were both tired but didn't want to stop hanging out. When they arrived, Tobin decided to get out and walk Christen to her car.

"Are you okay to drive?"

"Yes, I am." They stopped at the car and Tobin put her hands in her pockets before Christen spoke again. "Thank you for the night. I had a lot of fun."

"Thank you for coming with me." They stood there, looking at each other with soft smiles before Tobin got closer, taking a step forward and bringing her arms around the woman's waist. Christen automatically hugged her back tightly. That was way more personal and intimate than a friendly hug, the way they needed to just feel the other pressed against them, the way their grip was strong and almost scared to let go, almost scared it won't happen ever again to have the other in their arms in such way. Christen was so overwhelmed that she tensed slightly, heart racing and thoughts spiraling. Tobin immediately realized and tightened her arms even more. She didn't want to let go. The way it felt to have the younger woman in her arms made her realize she wanted this all the time, she wouldn't ever find something as important and beautiful as this exact moment, as this exact woman. Tobin was sure about it now.

"Good night Christen." she whispered before kissing her cheek and walking away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey you! I hope this chapter made you smile! Please, stay safe and positive during this tough time...I love you all, have a nice day!


	5. A certain someone is gonna be there.

The following week was weirdly normal. Christen managed to be professional with Tobin without being cold just like she had always been with her and with everyone else, really. It wasn't awkward at all and she lightly felt more stupid for her behavior. It didn't matter now, Ali was right, Tobin was an amazing menager and her presence in the company was absolutely essential by that point so it was easy for Christen to just keep working like she always did. Sometimes tho, she would notice how Tobin let her eyes linger for a little longer on her, silently asking if everything was fine and Christen just needed to look at her to answer that question. No words needed. And that's something she didn't know she needed, someone realizing she was not so sure about something without speaking up. It helped her in meetings and conferences in which Tobin would basically read her mind and ask something that made the conversation shift on the exact same thing that was bothering the ceo. Everything worked when she was around. It didn't necessarily had something to do with them going along outside the working environment but more to do with Tobin as a person. Her emphaty, her thoughtfulness, her confidence, her voice, her smile, her everything. She always knew what to say and when to say it for the company's benefits and for everyone amusement. 

Tobin was grabbing her stuff, ready to leave her office and going to the bar when Ali kncked.

"Hey Tobs!"

"Ali! I'm ready, let's go."

"Oh no, I'm not coming actually."

"How come? Are you okay?"

Ali smiled at the woman's kindness "Yes. Tomorrow is my girlfriend's birthday and well, I want to wait until midnight with her."

Tobin smirked. "Ohhh...I see." she winked.

"Shut up." she rolled her eyes and laughed.

Tobin got closer and hugged the woman's shoulder with one arm while they started walking together towards the exit. "Happy birthday to your girl, have fun okay?" she kissed her head. They had an amazing relationship. Since the very first day Ali had a good sensation about Tobin that just got stronger and stronger every day. Tobin loved Ali as well, she was a fantastic person and one she truly considered a friend in the office and ouside of it.

"Sure!" She said with her arm around the woman's waist. "Hey, you should come!"

"Where?"

"To my girlfriend's birthday party. It's not actually a party, we just eat something and play stupid games until we get too drunk. It's at my house."

Tobin laughed and shook her head. "Ali, I barely know your girlfriend!"

"I know but just like I said, our group of closest friends are coming over to her house tonight. Tomorrow night is a little fun celebration with a few more people" they stopped outside, one in front of the other before Ali continued. "Let me know!" they hugged and she whispered "A certain someone is gonna be there too, you know." 

Tobin just laughed loudly, throwing her head back and pushing the woman away.

"What? I'm just saying!" Ali said, throwing her hands in the air in self defence. 

"Bye Ali!" Tobin turned around and shook her head, still laughing at the woman antics. 

It was obviuosly an easy choice for Tobin and when she walked in and her eyes landed on Christen in snickers and a simple flower dress, with a glass of wine in her right hand laughing with the sweetest shoulder shrug, she knew she made the right choice to go to that party. Christen being gorgeous was nothing new but seeing her so relaxed did something to her. 

"Tobs!" Ali screamed at soon as she saw her at the front door.

"Hi Ali." She said hoping that the woman didn't notice her stare at Christen. Ashlyn came behind her girfriend calling for her

"Babe we nee-- Oh, hi. You must be Tobin!" 

"Yep. Happy bithday Ashlyn!" she shook her hand with a bright smile and offered her the bottles of wine she brought as Ali disppeard walking through the people.

"Thank you! Come on, let's have a drink." 

Christen was listening to some weird story Megan was recounting about an old college experience when her she looked behinf her friend's shoulder and saw Tobin. Her eyes immediately wide, she couldn't believe this. She abrutely stood up and found Ali poring a drink. She took her arm and spun her around.

"Why is Tobin here?"

"Oh, I invited her."

"Why?" she asked, almost pnicked.

"Because I wanted to, Chris."

"She doesn't even know Ashlyn!"

"Well, they're doing pretty well if you ask me." she nodded her head towards the direction in which Tobin and Ashlyn where currently laughing deeply at God knows what, like they were the best of friends. Christen didn't say anything for awhile, too busy staring at Tobin, looking so effortlessly beautiful. She sighed and looked back to Ali. Her friend immediately read her mind and put a hand on a shoulder.

"Can you just...forget for a minute that you work together? I invited her because she is my friend and I would like you to look at her like that too. Just a friend, just for tonight, Okay? It's not that hard."

Christen nodded and poured herself another glass of wine. They slowly walked back to their group of friends and set down trying her best to not look at Tobin for the rest of the night. 

Ashlyn and Tobin were talking like old friends about sports, of course. Tobin was having fun until at some point during the conversation, Ash caught her look in Christren's direction for the 8th time in five minutes.

"You're obvious, you know."

"What? Sorry, I wasn't listen--"

"Yeah, I know. You were busy checking Christen out."

"No! Not at all, just..." she looked down at her drink and shook her head. "What were you saying?"

"That you're obvious."

"About?"

"Your huge crush on Christen, dude."

"No, it's not like that, I swear. I mean, I wish, I just--It's not gonna happen." She took a sip of her wine to try and distract herself.

"Mh..." Ashlyn saw the somehow sad look in her eyes and decided to drop it, even if she had heard something from Ali. "Let's go." 

They walked up to the table of friends and Ashlyn spoke up. "Yo guys, this is Tobin and she knows about wine so..."

Tobin waved with a confident smile, forcing herself not to look at Christen before shaking everyone's hand. They sat down and somehow she ended up next to the ceo. They shared a shy smile and looked away. All it took was maybe half an hour before evryone was already in love with Tobin. Christen couldn't blame them tho. I mean she had the same charisma she always had at work as well. There was something about her energy that was SO attractive to her and the way the older woman was often sending her a smile, or a look, just to see if she was doing good, just underlined her caring and kind nature. They actually started talking, just the two of them, while the rest of the group was distracted, when Christen took a sip of the freashly pured wine.

"This tastes like your wine."

"It is! I brought a couple of bottles for Ashlyn." She smiled happily at the fact that Christen recognized her wine.

"It's really good tonight too." 

"Which one is it?"

"What?" she asked confused.

"Which one is it? The first I made you taste or the second one." she asked with a playful smile.

"They tested the same!" she laughed seeing Tobin cracking up as well.

"No! Come on, you can do it!"

"Tobin, I swear."

"No, they don't, Chris. How can you say that!?" The offended look on Tobin's face made Christen throw her head back in laughter and Tobin couldn't help but follow her.

In all this, they were totally unaware that the group was staring at them. Ali and Ashlyn just shared a knowing look and everyone else was just now finding out about their chemistry. Megan spoke first, not able to shut up to such a beautiful chance on teasing one of her friends.

"Okay, you two. What's so funny?"

Christen answered immediately. "She's trying to make me choose between two things that taste exactly the same."

"They don't! Different fermentation, different sweetness level, different processing... They just come from the same grapes."

"Tobin, I don't know about all that. They just taste the same to me."

"That's because you don't focus enough." she said in a teasing tone making the woman laugh again.

"And what should I focus on, exactly?" 

They didn't realize that they were smiling at each other during the entire interaction, totally forgetting they weren't the only two in the room. The truth is, even if they did realize it, it didn't matter. Nothing mattered to Tobin when Christen was with her, smiling just like last week, free from all the mental cages that the woman was used to build around herself at work. Tobin was fascinated by both sides of the woman. She was fascinated to every single part of Christen being so easily that she knew, deep down, that there was no going back for her but she didn't care. At all.  
Julie just whispered in Ali's ear something along the lines of 

"Is Christen really, like really, into her or am I imagining it?" Ali just smiled and before she could anwer Megan got closer and whispered 

"Oh, you bet she is." 

"Yeah but they work together so I don't think anything is ever gonna happen." Ali said almost sadly.

"Who cares? Look at her, she's never like this!" Megan nodded in Christen's direction. The woman was laughing and Tobin was watching her with the sweetest smile on. Ali sighed and turned back to the group.

"Yes but Tobin is my friend too. I don't want Christen to hurt her. Even if, I admit that I think they are amazing together and my invitation had maybe slightly something to do with their chemistry." She sighed again before continuing. "I don't know guys, you know Chris, she doesn't want a relationship. She has a lot of people that would kill for her but she doesn't--"

"Yeah, but LOOK at her." Megan screamed-whispered. "Sometimes you can't control your feelings and she definitely looks... I don't know, happy?"

Ashlyn then bended over and said out loud "What are you talking about?" making also Tobin and Christen pay attention to the group.

"Nothing." Megan said. "Hey, Tobin, so this is your wine, huh?"

"Yes. I'm the co-owner of the little place that produces and sells them around the country." she shrugs, almost shy to talk about this little passion.

"And how does Christen know?"

"Ehm...I took her there a while ago so..." she said, missing Ali's wide eyes and questioning look towards Christen that didn't dare to look at her friends.

"Oh, I see." Megan winked at her and took a sip. "That's very good Tobin."

"Thanks." she smiled politely before recieving another question, this time from Julie.

"So Tobin, are you single?"

Christen immediately looked up at her friends and read their intention. She couldn't do anything but give them a death glare and hope for the next hours to be painless.

"Yes."

"How come?"

"Juls... Really?" Christen said, making all the others almost laugh.

"What? I'm just getting to know your new friend." she said the last word with a teasing tone that made Tobin laugh and shook her head because she knew what they were doing and she knew that her friends back home would have done the same thing. She liked it tho, seeing Christen embarassed so she answered easily.

"I have very high standards." she said winking at Julie and hearing the group laugh. When Megan, Julie, Ali and Ashlyn saw the look in her eyes, they knew that Tobin was gonna play along, that she wasn't embarass in the slightest about their obvious intention in getting on Christen's nerves.

"Well, you know...Describe your type." The blonde said. Christen was rolling her eyes at everything and drinking wine without saying a word. She just wanted to disappear.

"I like strong and complicated women. Women that know what they want and are not afraid to be themselves."

"Well, you must have planty of them." Julie said with a wink. Yep, Christen definitely wanted to disappear.

"What's your type, Julie?"

"My husband."

"That's what I thought." she winked back with a huge smile. 

"Hey stranger!" Pierre whispered in Christen's ear making her jump.

"You scared me! Hi!" She stood up and hugged the man tightly, happy that there was a distraction to this conversation.

"Hi Chris, how are you?" he said stepping back but keeping an hand on Christen's waist. 

"Good, how are you? It's been so long since we got to hang out!" she said honestly with a huge smile.

"I know, crazy things with work."

"Tell me all about it. Where is Crystal? I lost her before."

"Over there. Let's go!" he offered an arm at her and she instantly took it and apologized to the group.

"Guys, I'll be back soon."

Tobin had so many questions but didn't dare asking any. She just looked at the ceo walking away with a dude she was completely comfortable with. She wasn't jelous at all. Or maybe she was but not for the classic reason of watching the woman you want go with someone else. She was jelous of him, of Ali, of Megan, of everyone that had a chance to know her for so long like the amazing, kind, person she was, while Tobin was stuck spending 80% of the time with Christen being professional. So it sucked, watching her leave without even aknowledging her. It reminded her that she was just a coworker to Christen. She took a sip of her drink, still watching Christen laugh with the man and a shorter black woman, when Ashlyn noticed and set down next to her.

"Don't worry about it."

"What?" Tobin asked confused.

"Don't worry about it. That's Crystal, one of our friends and that's Pierre, her husband."

Tobin thought about saying that she didn't care but what was the point? She felt slightly better knowing that he was just a friend even if she didn't want to admit it so she just nodded. When she looked up she saw Megan talk to her girlfriend and Julie to her husband. She stood up, wanting to leave Ali and Ashlyn alone and winked at the couple. 

She was drinking a glass of water before feeling a hand on her shoulder. She knew instantly who it was and she hated that she did.

"Do you want a glass of water?"

"Yes, please." Christen replied sweetly. 

Tobin just smiled and gave her the glass. The younger woman spoke first.

"What are you doing here, all by yourself?"

"I don't know that many people and Ali and Ashlyn...well..." she let her eyes find the couple that was currently making out hugging each other like they couldn't breathe without the other "...really wanted to do that." she shrugged hearing Christen laugh.

"Yeah, I know how that feels like. I always find myself between Sue and Megan or Ali and Ashlyn." she shook her head giggling.

"Same here but for different reasons." Tobin smiled.

"Why?"

"Well, everyone would be lucky to have you."

"I don't think so." She replied almost laughing at how wrong that sentence was.

"I do."

Christen looked down blushing and shaking her head before looking up again. They locked eyes and started laughing while Christen pushed Tobin with a hand on her chest. "Stop it."

"Doing what?"

"Saying things that aren't true."

"That's true! You know I think it's true." Tobin said with a stupid grin and a gentle gaze. 

"Whatever, let's go." Christen rolled her eyes making the other laugh before taking her hand and dragging her to a couch.

They set there for the rest of the night, talking, laughing, joking around and teasing each other. Christen couldn't help but feel refreshed every time she spoke with Tobin. She could enjoy every little moment so naturally that she didn't even realize how tired she was. That was until Tobin made a comment.

"Chris, you should go home. Your eyes are closing more often and they look glossy."

"Wow, nice way of making me understand you don't want me around. Okay, got it." she stood up, looking pissed off and Tobin instantly stood up in front of her.

"What? No, that's not what I meant, you just look tired and I thought you'd want to go so I-- You little piece of..." she saw Christen laugh and couldn't even be mad.

"You looked so cute! It's okay, I guess you're tired too since you didn't realize I was teasing you." she said shrugging with her right shoulder while closing her eyes coyly.

"You're so mean."

"Whatever. You're right tho, I should go home. Give me a second." she stood up and made her way to Zach and Julie. "Hey guys, you're still bringing me home, right?"

"Mh...no." Julie said with a smile.

"W-what? Of course we're Chris, we're ready in--" Zach's voice was stopped by Julie's gaze that silently screamed 'do not contradict me'.

Christen was a litte confused but before she could ask anything else, Julie hugged her and whispered in her ear

“Just ask Tobin.”

Christen’s eyes went wide when she understood what her friend meant and whispered back.

“Julie no! Are you serious? Don’t you dare leav—”

“Oh come on! I'm sure she won't mind at all. Besides” she took a step back and looked at Christen “I actually already offered a ride to other people so…” she shrugged with a smile.

“Ugh. I hate you.”

“You like her.”

“We’re friends. We’re coworkers actually.”

“Who cares!”

“Julie…” she pointedly looked at her.

“Okay, sorry. Nothing I can do about it now. Have fun!” and with that, she kissed Christen’s cheek and disappeard with a laughing Zach behind.

Tobin was watching the scene from the couch. She stood up and got closer to Christen.

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, just…I don’t have a ride home so I’ll call a—”

“I can take you. I already know where you live, you don’t need to wait for a cab.” She said easily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> So this chapter was meant to be longer but I was already over 4k words in so I decided to split it... If you dislike me for it now, just know that this means that the 6th chapter is already half way through!  
> Please remember, English isn't my first language so there might be some mistakes, feel free to let me notice them!  
> Let me know if you liked this chapter and what are your thoughts about it!  
> I hope you have a nice day! Love you all, bye!


	6. Take all the time you need.

After the barely 15 minutes long care ride, Tobin stopped and parked in order to let Christen get out safetly. Christen smiled at her, mumbling a shy "Thank you" before turning around, ready to open the door by then she stopped. She let her head rest on the window for a second, eyes close, back towards Tobin still. Before she could understand what was happening, her voice was filling the car.

"Do you want a glass of water?"

"What?" Tobin almost laughed at how random that was.

"Water. Do you want some?"

"Ehm...Sure." She turned the car off while Christen got out and walked to the front door. Tobin didn't really register what was happening she just followed the woman silently. 

Christen opened the door, started climbing the inside stares until she stopped at her appartament door to open that one too. She got inside, and Tobin followed, closing the door behind her back and looking around.

"Wow, your place is so nice."

"Thanks." she smiled and gave Tobin a glass of water still asking herself why did she invite the woman in. The answer to that question was a pretty simple one actually: she wanted to. She had so much fun with her and she didn't want this night to end. Not yet, at least. Maybe it was thanks to Ali's words about how she should stop looking at the woman as a coworker just for that night that Christen came to the realization that Tobin was pretty much perfect to her. She knew herself enough to admitt that she was a complicated person and it was very hard to caught her attention in the first place but keep it? Almost impossible. There was this thing about Tobin that made her think that the two of them could really have something she never had with anyone before. The way Tobin talked, and listened and cared about every single word that left Christen's mouth, made her feel free to be her stubborn, cocky, funny, confident, annoying and unapologetic self without feeling judged or weird. Tobin always knew what to say to her in such a respectful way that she wanted to forget they worked together because it just didn't matter tonight and--

"Hey, are you okay?" Tobin put the glass on the table and got closer to Christen that was currently staring at the floor.

"Yeah. Yes, sorry I was just thinking."

"Yeah, I know." She winked and took the glass of water again to finish it. She could feel Christen tension melt at the action so she kept going. "Oh wow, Chris. This water is so good!"

Christen just laughed, almost choking on her own glass of water before shaking her head and walking to the couch. Tobin followed her without a question and took a sit to her left. She was still confused as why did Christen wanted her there but she really enjoyed the night with her and she was happy to be with that beautiful, kind woman just a little bit longer. If she had to be completely honest, all it took was Christen's presence to make everything better in every way and if by keeping her company she could make the younger woman smile, that was more than enough for her.  
The two didn't really watched the TV instead they talked about their lifes. Again. They could go on for hours and hours about only god knows what. Everything was so easy between them, they just understood each other in such a deep way. They talked about their fears and saddest moments and happiest moments. In the air nothig but acceptance and respect.

"Not being enough is probably one of my biggest one."

“For who?”

“For anyone, I guess but mostly for my own expectations.”

"Chris, you'll always be enough. You're an amazing ceo, an amazing person, you accomplished so much at such a young age, you should be proud of yourself."

"Thank you." she whispered, almost emotional at the woman's words. "What about you?"

"Biggest fear?" when she saw the woman nod she answered "I don't know... I think maybe find something really good and letting it go. I missed so many opportunity to be happy in my life just because I didn't...fight hard enough. Now, that I'm older I changed a lot. Now I know what I want and I'm not afraid to go for it. I wish I could go back and tell to my younger self to just...live, and be more confident."

"Yeah, I understand that. I spent my teenage years having anxiety and panic attacks because I'd focus so much on everything I wasn't doing that...I just didn't enjoy those years enough."

They locked eyes after that and smiled. "I should probably go, Chris." Tobin stood up and looked at her watch. It was late.

"Yeah." Christen nodded, not feeling tired at all now that Tobin was there.

They walked to the door and shared a sweet hug before Christen opened it and asked "See you on Monday?"

Tobin just nodded like she almost forgot that the two worked together. A few seconds of silence went by, neither of them wanted to let the other go but they both knew they should in order to avoid doing something they would regret in the morning. They shared a smile "Bye, Chris."

When Christen closed the door she covered her face with her hands and whispered to herself "What are you doing?"

Tobin was about to go down the stairs when she stopped. "Fuck it" she thought. 

She turned around and knocked on the door. Christen was still there so she opened it immediately, already knowing who it was and what was about to happen. Before she could ask anything, Tobin took a step forward, put both of her hands on the woman's cheeks and kissed her with so much want. Christen didn't even hesitated in kissing her back. It was passionate and hungry. Hands moving on each other's bodies, lips parting and tasting and feeling, heart beating fast and heavy breaths filling the silence. They both lost the perception of time during the kiss but eventually neeeded to stop to breathe proply. Their eyes opened at the same time and at the same time found the other's. No words needed to be said and no words ever could describe what they were feeling so Tobin just rested her forhead on Christen's before kissing her again, slower this time. This kiss was sweet and caring and definitely terryfing for the both of them.  
When they separated Tobin took a deep breath and a step back. She could read on the younger woman's face so many contraddictory emotions that she already knew what she was about to say. Maybe somethina along the lines of "this is wrong, we’re making a huge mistake, we're coworkers." Christen knew that Tobin was worried as much as she was. She got closer, she moved some hair behind the woman's ear before looking in her eyes with fear and confusion and hugged her. Tobin hugged her back just as tight and Christen spoke.

"Tobin, I-"

"No, you don't need to say anything."

"No, just..." she sighed and took a step back, tears were now falling for how good the kiss felt and how bad the words she was about to say tasted. "You deserve someone that wants this. I-..." she looked down and shook her head. "I can't do this. I have the company and-" she couldn't finish that sentence. 

Tobin just nodded and looked down as well. She knew this. Since the firsts conversations with Christen, she knew that Christen didn't want a relationship, it was her own fault. She wanted to reassure her, telling her not to worry about it but the kiss was still fresh on her lips and her heartbeat still crazy fast so she looked at the woman one last time before turning around and leaving the apartment.

Christen immediately got to bad and started crying. She didn’t know why it was so hard for her to let herself enjoy something that felt so right and beautiful. She stayed like that for a while until she couldn’t take it anymore. The look that Tobin gave her, the hurt in her eyes made it impossible for her to fall asleep without the other knowing how good that felt, so she called her, hoping she’d answer.

Tobin was staring at the ceiling, hands behind her head, mind full of thoughts. It was pretty late in the night maybe 2 a.m. and the phone ringing scared her enough to jump. When she saw it was Christen, something inside of her didn’t want to answer. But Tobin knew already that denying something to this woman was impossible for her. She sighed and took the call.

“Hey.” She whispered, sounding almost annoyed. Wanting to sound annoyed.

“Hi, did I wake you up?”

“No. What’s up?”

“Nothing I just…I-“ her voice started to tramble.

“Hey…Chris it’s okay, I know you don’t want—”

“No, Tobin. You don’t understand.” She took a deep breath before continuing “Can you just…Can you give me some time? Please?”

Tobin was actually shocked by that question. Maybe, just maybe she had a chance with this incredible woman. She smiled to herself while Christen was biting her lip waiting anxiously for an aswer. “Of course I can. Take all the time you need.”

Christen felt another tear leave her eye before whispering “Thank you.”

“Of course, beautiful.” She said after hearing the shaky voice. “I’m scared too, you know.” Christen just nodded even if the woman couldn’t see her. Tobin kept going, wanting to break the tension a little bit. “Are you crying because you’re drunk or because you want to kiss me again?”

Christen laughed and shook her head. “You’re an idiot.”

“Oh, I know I am. You should get some sleep, okay? I’ll text you in the morning.”

“Okay. Good night Tobs.”

Tobin smiled. It was the first time the woman had called her that. “Good night…Oh Christen?”

“Yeah?”

“I want to kiss you again too.” She said in a teasing tone, hearing the woman laugh.

When the phone called ended she was even more overwhelmed than before it started. Tobin made her fall asleep with a smile on her face tho and that was enough for tonight.

Christen woke up and her eyes went wide when she remembered what exactly happened the night before. She called Ali as soon as she got up.

“Hey Chri—"

“I kissed her.”

“What?”

“I- Last night Tobin came in and I kissed her. I mean, she kissed me but I kissed her back.” 

There was silence for a few seconds before Ali spoke with an excited voice. “How was it?”

“It was... It was—” She sighed. “Ali, I don’t know what I’m doing anymore, I had everything under control and now I don’t fucking know anymore.”

“Christen, you can’t rationalize everything, okay? You need to accept it, there are things you just can’t control. Attraction is one of those.”

“I know but I still wish I could.” 

Ali just laughed and shook her head. “I know, sweetie. Everything is gonna be okay. You’re both adults and you’re both really good at comunicating and understanding one another.”

“You’re right. I just need a little time to process everything. I also have to think about the dinamic with working tog—”

“Christen, that doesn’t matter and you know it. Actually, your ability to understand each other without saying a word, helped us closing more deals than I can remember.” She giggled hearing the ceo do the same. It was true. “Chris, I love you and you honestly deserve all the good things that life can give you and if Tobin makes you happy than you’ll figure out the extra complications together. Besides, that girl is completely screwed, she looks at you like you’re her whole world.”

Christen smiled almost blushing at hearing how sure the woman was. “She does?”

“Yes! Of course she does.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> I was gonna end last chapter with Tobin leaving and that's why I ultimately choose to split it. I don't like the idea of closing chapters in a sad way (even if I might need to at some point), I want you guys to read my stories and feel excited and happy!  
> Anyway, let me know if you like it and feel free to ask me anything you want!  
> Thank you for all your love and support!  
> Have a nice day, bye!


	7. I hate not knowing stuff.

Things were great unexpectedly for both Tobin and herself. Christen thought that after the kiss and the phone call, everything was gonna be horrible at work and she'd automatically push Tobin away again. Obviuosly she was forgetting that she never met someone like Tobin before. Nothing changed around the company and besides them hanging out more (usually Tobin waiting for Christen to be over with her work to spend a few minutes in her office) the two of them stayed professional like they always had, they both were doing their jobs in a total normal way and Christen often found herself admiring Tobin not just for her amazing ability to stay focused and always take care of little ditails other people would ignore, but also because she was doing everything by never change who she was. She was like that at work, outside of work, when she was stressed out or when she was happy. She never changed, same smile, same easy going nature, same kindness. Christen could feel herself losing control over her feelings and no matter how hard she tried she couldn't get herself to do anything but see it happening. One time specifically Tobin prooved to her that she could be an important part of her personal life and still be helpful on the professional level without necessary split these two things. Only Tobin was able to do so. No one else.

"Hey you, are you done?" Tobin asked when she walked in that night.

"I wish...No, I fucked up a plan and now I have to write the whole thing again." She sighed.

"Oh okay, let me see." Tobin set down and started analizing some papers, taking out her laptop from her bag.

Christen looked up at her with a confused face "What are you doing?" 

"Helping you?" Tobin said almost laughing at how obviuos that was.

"No Tobin! I couldn't ask you to do th-"

"You're not asking, I'm offering. Besides, Chris you need help. This will take forever..."

Christen sighed and covered her face with her hands "I know but you shouldn't help me, this is totally my fault and--" 

"Don't worry about it. It's not like I have anything else to do tonight." 

"Everything would be better than staying in this office when you're done."

"I'm helping the prettiest woman in this entire building...Doesn't sounds so bad to me." She said, still not looking up and keeping her eyes on her laptop.

Christen just stared at her for a couple of seconds before shaking her head with a smile and starting reading again.

That night they ordered take out and ate in Christen's office while laughing at crazy college's adventures and random stuff before finishing the last part of the plan.

"We did it!" Christen raised her arms in the air with the biggest smile that Tobin couldn't help but match.

"Yeah!" 

They stared at each other with tired smiles before the CEO stood up and got closer to Tobin, she offered an hand to help her up and then hugged her tight. That was the first time they had any phisical contact since the party and it felt refreshing to both of them.

"Thank you." Christen whispered. "You have a way of making anything enjoyable."

"You don't have to thank me, Chris." Tobin said, holding the woman with her eyes closed. "What are you doing on the weekend?" she asked when they took a step back.

Christen shrugged "Working?"

"Yeah, okay, afterwards?" she rolled her eyes.

"I don't know, nothing I guess."

"Go out on a date with me." Tobin said wit the sweetest smile.

The younger woman just laughed and nodded "Okay."

"Wait, really? Well...That was easy." 

At that the woman just laughed even more "After what happened the night of Ash's party?"

"Yeah, well... I didn't know how you'd act after that night." Tobin bit her lip and looked around with her hands in her pockets.

"Yeah, I know." Christen said smiling. It was the first time she saw Tobin being that shy. It was adorable. 

When Saturday came, Tobin sent a text to Christen first thing in the morning: 'I'll pick you up at 5pm, dress casual!' which wasn't even close to the amount of informations Christen needed to go to a date but she didn't dare to ask anything else.   
The CEO knew that if she'd start overthinking everything with Tobin than she'll end up pushing her away and for some reason she didn't want to. It scared her. Since she had the company she only saw people in a casual way, making it very clear that she wasn't interested in having a relationship or any type of commitment. Now? She wasn't just getting attached to someone but that someone was also somwone she was working with and that made everything even more complicated. When she really thought about it she had so many reason to say 'no' to Tobin and every single one of them came straight from her rules, the rules she made up before starting the company and that she needed to let go of. Of course as soon as Tobin smiled at her every thoughts disappeard.

"Hey." She said while Tobin opened the car door for her. "Thanks."

Tobin got in and smiled. "Hey, you. Are you ready?"

Christen just nodded looking at her starting the car before asking "Where are we going?"

"Who knows." she shrugged.

"I hate not knowing stuff."

"You hate not controlling stuff. It's different."

"Whatever." Christen rolled her eyes but couldn't hide her little smile.

"You can't control my date. Get your own." the older woman said like a little kid making Christen laugh.

"You wish, Heath."

After talking for a while durong the car ride, Tobin stopped and got out of the car to open the door for her. Christen looked around and started laughing loudly, throwing her head back. Tobin was smiling from ear ro ear, watching this beautiful woman laugh and the way her face looked under the Luna Park's ligths. When she stopped, her eyes met Tobin's and she shook her head still smiling. 

"I swear to God Heath, I don't even know what to say. You're such a tease."

"What do you mean?" She asked laughing and opening her arms. "You're so mean to me all the time so I was thinking 'what would Christen absolutely hate?' and do you know the answer to that question, Miss Press?"

Christen shook her head.

"Losing."

"Who says I'm going to lose?"

"Well, let's see." Tobin took her hand and dragged her.

After a couple of hours of railways, dodgems and shooting at cans, Christen was glad she was wearing comfortable shoes. 

"That was so tiring." The older woman said while sitting on a bench.

"Losing is tiring Heath."

"What? Beating you is tiring."

"Take that back!" Christen said laughing and slapping her arm. 

Tobin sighed and looked at her. "Did you have fun?"

"Yeah, winning is fun." She replied winking.

Tobin just laughed and shook her head. During the games she was glad she took Christen there. She liked seeing her carefree and playful, it was the main reason she chose that place. The more she observed the woman the more she convinced herself that Christen was someone she wanted in her life for as long as possible. Never in her life she would have thought that the attractive, intelligent and dedicated woman she worked with was able to make her so incredibly happy by just...Being her beautiful self. 

She took her hand and stood up again. "Let's go pretty girl."

"Where?"

"Ice cream."

"Oh my God, yes!" She said excited. She couldn't even remember the last time she had so much fun and she didn't care remembering it because this, right here, was all she was missing. Here, feeling free like a kid, waiting for ice cream with a woman that was slowly changing her mind about the future, laughing and being her autentic self without limits or rules. She looked at Tobin's hand in hers and squeezed it a little to get her attention. When she looked back, Christen just took a step closer, putting her free hand on her neck and pressed a quick kiss on her lips before separating with a smile and watching the shocked look on Tobin's face. She laughed at it and Tobin looked down while blushing. It was the first time they kissed after the party and it felt as good as that night for both of them.

After eating and talking some more they both got in the car, ready to go home, completely exhausted by the day. They said their goodbye with a hug and tired smile and when Christen laid down that night, she couldn’t help but smile. She was tired of fighting against her feelings. Letting go of her rules was gonna be hard but she wanted to anyway because Ali was right months ago and she was right in that moment too: She was gonna end up loosing her and she wouldn’t ever forgive herself if she didn’t try.

She thought everything was going fine until more than a week later. Between them nothing changed, they kept building their relationship day by day, mostly being professional and hanging out after work when they could and everything was normal until one day her phone rang.

“Good morning, Miss Press?”

“Yes, who am I talking with?”

“I’m the business manager of the A.R. Company from New York. I wanted to comunicate to you personally the falling of the deal we previously agreed to sigh.”

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Miss Press, this deal should’have been closed two weeks ago and we still haven’t received the official contract yet. I’m so—”

“I’m sorry but there has to be a mistake. The contract is already been sent on the date we agreed with.”

“No, Miss Press. The contract never came through.”

Christen, being the amazing CEO she was, she convinced the business menager to have a meeting the next day to clarify this mistake and as soon as she hang up she walked out and spoke to Ali.

“Meeting in 10 minutes. Everybody has to be there.” She said with an angry tone before walking back in her office and shutting the door as stong as possible. 

Ali freezed and immediately started informing everyone of the meeting. She knew something very serious was happening because Chris never looked that pissed off. As soon as Christen walked in the meeting room, Ali knew that ‘pissed off’ was an understatment and so did everyone alse. Christen looked at all those scared faces, one by one, and broke the silence. “I recieved a call earlier, by the A.R. Company from New York. And I was surprised when their business menager told me that the deal was no longer going to happen. So I asked what was wrong with the contract and they just informed me that, as long as they knew, the contract didn’t exist.”

Her voice was scary cold and no one dared to say anything, everyone just looked around trying to find the answer which pissed off Christen even more. “Who was in charge to send that contract?”

The silence broke when Allie stood up. “I-I was. I swear I sent it on the date we set with them.”

“Apparantly not, Long. It didn’t even cross your mind to make sure you sent it?”

“N-No, I mean I know I s—”

“Heath, why din’t you inform me of the lack of response from them?”

“Well, I thought that maybe they were thinking about changing some parts of the contract and it was taking a little bit of time mor—”

“That’s not what we had agreed on and you sure know that since you’re the operation menager. Every single one of you know how this things work! So here I am, trying to save a deal that I thought was already closed because neither of you could do your job properly!”   
They were all shocked. That was the first time Christen looked and sounded so angry. She usually was such a kind and relaxed worker, with everything under control. Allie had teary eyes now and Tobin just covered her face with her hands. Christen stood up and before turning around she spoke “If I can’t save this deal, you’re both out of the company.” And with that she walked out, leaving wide eyes behind.


	8. That's all I can think about.

Of course the next day Christen saved the deal. That wasn’t even a fondamental company they worked with and they immediately understood that it wasn’t anything but a stupid mistake but to Christen, it wasn’t just that. It wasabout credibility and professionalism and she couldn’t believe that something like that actually happened. Later that day, Allie and Tobin were knocking at the door after she asked for them to meet her and talk about the situation. 

“Come in. Sit down.”

Allie and Tobin were both pale and terrified. So many things were going through Tobin’s mind, she was scared to lose a job she truly enjoyed, she was scared to lose this life she had built in L.A., she was scared to lose the people that were becoming such a big part of her life and more than anything else, she was scared to lose the woman in front of her, the one that she couldn’t stop thinking about and that right now was disappointed in her. 

“I think you already know that what happened is unforgiveble. You’re both professionals and I expect nothing but the best from my coworkers and I make that clear since the very beggining.” Her eyes and voice was cold and confident. “Allie, Tobin the thing that makes me really angry is that, this, was a stupid mistake but it also show me that you only take seriously big companies and that’s what makes me believe I can’t trust you guys.”

Tobin was watching her with pleading eyes, telling herself that this was a nightmare, that Christen wasn’t about to fire her for this stupid mistake. She looked to her left and saw Allie cleaning her cheeks from the tears. She wanted to argue but before she could Christen spoke again.  
“Even if I saved the deal and explained personally what happened to the A.R. that understood the situation easily, unfortunatelly that’s not enough for me.” She took a deep breath and looked at Allie and then at Tobin. “I don’t trust you guys anymore. This could have happened with a big compan—”

“Are you serious? I can’t believ—”

“Tobin, don’t you dare interrupt me again.” Her tone making it clear that she was not messing around. Tobin jumped at that, hurt by that voice and that gaze. “As I was saying, I don’t trust you. This company, every single person in here has to give the same attention for every company we work with, doesn’t matter if big or small. There aren’t people that deserve more attention than others to me. I want the best from you, always. With that being said, you’re both amazing workers and I’m sure you’ll be more careful from now on.”

At that statment Allie looked up with wide eyes and Tobin had her mouth open. Christen kept a straight face but she wanted to laugh at the two. They deserved it and even if she was truly mad at both of them, everyone can make mistakes and since the consequences weren’t that drammatic, she knew she could let it go. 

“Oh my…Oh my God, Thank you, I-I’m so sorry, I don’t know how I let that happen, I don--” Allie tried her best to make sense but she couldn’t. Christen stood up, opened her arms and Allie hugged her. They have been coworkers from the start and she knew that was just a dumb mistake. 

“Never do that again, okay? Don’t make me regret this. Both of you.” She looked back at Tobin that responded with a firm nod but sad eyes. The older woman knew that Christen meant every word and that she din’t trust them anymore. She din’t trust her anymore. She couldn’t help but think that maybe everything they had built in those months was suddenly meaningless to the CEO. Fuck.

At the end of that day she didn’t go to her office to hang out. She was too scared. After the kiss, the date, the conversations and the time they shared, living in a world where she didn’t mean anything to Christen scared her. The next day at work she knocked on the door to give her some documents.

“Hi, sorry. I-I came to give you this.” The confident and smiley Tobin completely gone.

“Thanks, leave them here.” Christen replied without even looking up at her.

She sighed. “Christen, I’m sorry about what happen—”

“Heath, I already said everything I needed to you and Allie, so…” 

“I know…but this has nothing to do with us outside of here, right?”

At that Christen looked up. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Work has nothing to do with personal stuff for me and you know it.”

“Good, okay, yeah.” She sighed and left the room. She really hoped that Christen was only giving her an hard time and that soon everything was gonna be back to normal. A normal that took months to reach.

Unfortunately, Christen ignored her the whole day but that wasn’t even the problem. The problem came the day after when someone else walked in. Christen hugged him tight with the biggest smile and immediately Tobin felt bothered by him, without even knowing why. It was Friday and so everyone went out. Tobin didn’t bother asking Christen because she already knew the answer. When she walked in the bar she freezed. Christen was there laughing in the way that Tobin loved the most but with that man that had an arm trapped around her waist. She knew she had no reason to be jealous but she was anyway. Instantly their date, less than two weeks ago, looked so far away and that scared her even more. She couldn’t handle this. Being ignored by Christen, losing her trust at work, losing her attention outside of work. She realized that Christen had the power of destroying her by just not being there. Tobin didn’t know if she was in love but she was old enough to know that if she didn’t stop this now, she couldn’t do it anymore. So without thinking and trapped by her own fears, the next Monday she walked in Christen’s office and presented her layoff request letter.

Christen raised her eyebrows and looked up at Tobin “What’s this?”

Tobin wouldn’t look at her and she didn’t want to talk right now.

Christen wasn’t having it. “What’s this Tobin?”

“You know what it is.”

“Are you kidding me? Why?” Christen was so confused by this whole thing. Why was she leaving? Nothing happened, yeah she was a little cold the last couple of days but this? This was news to her.

“I don’t feel like working here is the best thing for me right now.” She lied.

“Why?” When Christen didn’t hear an answer she just shrugged and handed the paper back to Tobin. “If you’re not going to give me an explanation then I’m not going to sign it.”

Tobin now looked at her with an intensity that almost scared her “Christen, I can’t do this anymore, okay? I thought I could but I can’t.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I can’t deal with you ignoring me and then smiling around other people. I can’t deal with working with you when you don’t trust me and I can’t deal with knowing that we have no chance. Maybe that’s unprofessional of me, well fuck that.”

“Tobin I was just upset with you and Allie in the same way for what happened a couple of days ago, okay? Nothing more.”

“Well I can’t d—”

“And you having no chance? What does that has to do with your job? Huh? So what’s your plan? Leaving the company so you don’t have to see me anymore?”

“Yes!” She screamed regretting it immediately when she saw those green eyes staring back at her. She closed her own eyes and sighed. “Chris, I’m too far gone now, okay? I don’t know why but my feelings for you are so deep and so different from everything I’ve ever experienced. Now that I know how good I feel when I’m with you there is no way I’m ever going to survive you telling me you’re not ready for a relationship or us not ending up together and watching you everyday here because that’s all I want. That’s all I can think about. So if you care about me, just a little bit, please sign this.”

Christen forced her breathing to slow down and asked “What makes you think we aren’t going to end up together?” thinking that she did. She really thought they could end up together.

“I know who you are.” She whispered.

Christen didn’t know why but she was so hurt by that little sentence. They had already talked about it and the last few weeks with them working together perfectly fine and texting in their free time and hanging out as much as possible, she thought Tobin knew that it could work just like she did. She thought she could feel it too. Apparantly she couldn’t. She took a pen, set down and signed the paper not looking up at her.

Tobin was hurt by it all. She thought she was doing the best thing to protect herself from an heartbreak. Now she wasn’t so sure. Now, it felt like the biggest mistake of her entire life. She turned around but before she could walk out, Christen spoke.

“You did it again.” She said looking outside the window.

“What?” Tobin asked looking at her face.

“Letting something go without fighting hard enough.” 

And that sentence was everything Tobin needed to hear to know that she really, totally fucked up.

That night she was lying in bed after crying for what felt like hours. Everything went completely wrong. Why did she let those fears control her, make her literally walk away from the place and people she now loved, walking away from a woman she was afraid to love and that was slowly letting her in? Christen was right, she was giving up after finding something amazing, something she maybe spent her entire life looking for, something she knew it could make her the happiest she could ever been.

Christen wasn’t doing much better in her own bed. She was confused by everything. She was being a little cold with her at work, that’s true, but she was doing the same thing with Allie. On the outside tho? Tobin just pushed her away. The older woman didn’t text her that weekend and they didn’t hang out together but she figured she was just busy or something as insignificant as that. She didn’t expect things to go that way at all and she was clearly missing something. It was so sudden and pointless and she had so many questions but one thing she really couldn’t deal with not knowing, was eating her alive. In less than twenty minutes she was knocking on Tobin’s door.

Tobin opened the door slightly confused and when she saw Christen, all the air left her lungs.

“What did you mean?” the younger woman asked, walking in.

“What?”

“You said that you know who I am.”

“Well, yeah, I guess I do.” The two were standing in front of each other, both with red eyes and confused emotions.

“Then tell me. Tell me who I am.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> Did you really think I was going to leave you hanging like that for a long time?! Hahah  
> I liked the idea of ending the last chapter with a little suspense just to see your reactions and I have to say this: Your comments and messages made me laugh so much!  
> Now, I know what you're thinking..."Hey El, this chapter is even worse" but trust me, it's not!  
> Next chapter may take a while but it's (hopefully) going to be worth it!  
> I love you guys a lot, thank you for the kudos and love, please stay safe and kind!


	9. Are we done?

"Then tell me. Tell me who I am."

"I-" Tobin sighed while her shaky hand went trough her hair. "You are an amazing CEO."

"Go on." Christen crossed her arms.

"You're very kind and relaxed, it looks like you always know what to say to make everyone feel better, you're balanced in everything, even your imperfections. You enpower people, we all feel important and necessary when you're around." She looked up at her for a split second before turning her gaze in other directions. "You're...You're funny and-and easy to talk to." she laughed slightly and shook her head, still not looking up. "Actually you do this thing when you're listening to a story in which your eyes are slightly wide because you're focused on listening to every word and understanding every emotion just like you were experiencing it first hand." She shrugged, scratching the back of her neck. Her smile became less wide. "You're determined and strong and that can make it very hard to change your mind. You're stuck in your ways and somethimes I feel like that's keeping you from being happy. Like, really happy. But again, I'm probably wrong because you're always right and well, you were right when you said that creating a relationship with a coworker was gonna make everything complicated because it did." She smiled sadly while looking at her hands. "I thought I could keep being professional but I failed and-and that's my fault. You have always been honest with me and I'm trying to do the same. You're a lot of things but describing you is almost impossible to me because...Because I think I have a little part inside of me that wants to be mad at you for having everything under control while I can't even look at you smile at someone else before remembering that I'm just a coworker to you. So I really wish I could hate you but apparantly I can't even do that and I don't understand why but it's driving me insane." She was talking very slowly and very slowly she looked up at Christen. "You are every beautiful thing you don't realize you are."

Christen was looking back at her with an unreadible face. She let her arms fall to the sides. "Go on."

Tobin didn't know what was happening so she shrugged, silently asking what was she supposed to say. Christen didn't give her an answer tho so she kept going about random stuff, breaking eye contact with the woman, almost like she was looking for the right words on the pavement. "I think I was attracted to you since the first day I met you. Your eyes, your smile, the way your hair fell gently on your shoulders, I-" 

She stopped smiling and speaking when she noticed that woman took a step forward but when she didn't hear anything she looked away again and kept talking. "You were so serious but still smiley, you know? You're confusing."

Christen took another step but Tobin didn't stop this time.

"You're this badass CEO and you literally melt when you see a cute dog or flower or whatever goofy little thing." She shook her head smiling at the ground before she remembered something and she looked up at Christen with wide eyes. "Oh and you can't wink! You alway--" Her smile fell again when she saw Chrsten so close to her that their lips almost touched. 

"Go on." Christen whispered putting a hand on the older woman's hip.

"Y-You are so stubborn and so am I but sometimes I just want to scream at you becaus--" Christen was now taking slow steps, pushing Tobin with her until she was pressed between her body and the door.

"Go on Tobin."

But she couldn't. Maybe it was the emotions of the last few days or that she could feel every inch of the woman's body on her. Maybe she was overwhelmed or tired or fucking confused about this whole thing but she couldn't talk anymore. Christen then gently took both of her cheeks with her hands before bringing her close.

It was meant to be a sweet and chaste kiss but it wasn't even close to that. Tobin hugged her waist immediately and the two started kissing like that was the last time they could, like they had been waiting forever and suddenly they couldn't wait anymore. They waited and thought and controlled too much in those months so now, it was time to feel.  
Tobin slowly detached herself from the door taking a small step and bending down to put her arms under the younger woman's thighs to lift her up. She walked to her bedroom and without stopping the kiss for even a second, she let their bodies lie down on her bed and let the heavy breathing and passion fill the air for the rest of the night until they fell asleep in each other arms, like letting go wasn't even an option.

They both jumped at the sound of the allarm , the next morning. After Tobin tuned it off she looked to her left. Christen had still her eyes closed and she looked as beautiful as ever.

Almost sensing Tobin's eyes on her she whispered "Come closer, I'm cold."

The older woman immediately let a wide smile appear on her face before hugging the woman and kissing her head. "Good morning, beautiful."

Christen just hummed and Tobin laughed and kissed her ear before whispering "We need to go to work."

The CEO stayed silent for a few seconds before smiling and opening her eyes. "You don't work there anymore Tobs."

The realization hit Tobin that closed her eyes and covered her face with her hand.

Christen laughed at the woman's disappointed face before moving her hand off her face and kissing her cheek. "Tell me more about how you don't want to see me anymore..." She said with a teasing tone.

Tobin wasn't smiling tho, she just sighed and looked at the ceiling "I fucked up. I don't even know why I did that."

Christen moved and set on Tobin's addomen, with each knee beside Tobin's ribs and her hands in the middle of her chest. "You did but that's okay, I did too." She looked at the watch on the nightstand, feeling the older woman's hands on her hips before continuing "We need to get ready but we still need to talk about everything that happened okay? We need to have a very long conversation about it all so we can actually move on and start this in the right way."

Tobin juat nodded and smiled. "Yes, boss." She saw her rolling her eyes before starting tickling her sides until Christen fell on her chest laughing. 

"Stop! Tobin!" She stood up and looked around. Before she could get to Tobin's closet to steal some clothes for the day, her eyes landed on the layoff letter on the nightstand. She took it and looking straight at Tobin, she ripped it off with a smile.

Tobin smiled back, eyes bright and excited like a little kid. 

Christen left the room but not before throwing a "You better not be late for work, Heath at Tobin that just laughed.

That was for sure the best morning she had ever experience in her entire life.

When they closed the door of the appartment, they shared a kiss and both smiled at how domestic this all thing was and how one night literally changed months of confusion and doubts. Since Christen came with her own car the night before, they parted ways so they could go to work. That was probably a good think for both of them, having some time to process all the things that happened not only that night but ever since Tobin walked in that office.

Tobin couldn't stop smiling. Of all the ways she had dreamed about finally ending up with Christen, this wasn't an option. During the car ride, she thought about how just 24 hours ago, she was trying her best not to cry, knowing that she was about to say goodbye to someone she really didn't want to. She thought a lot about why she wanted to give up and why she let the fear of being hurt come first after pining over the woman for months. She also thought about being scared just before falling asleep with Christen in her arms, maybe because Christen was gonna regret it or leave without waking her up or everything could have been awkward. Then she smiled at how perfect waking up with her felt and how clearly she had a lot to learn about her. At how gentle her green eyes were when she first opened them, how sweet that little smile and voice was. Her mind quickly going back to the night they had spent together. Everything felt so right and good, not just in a sexual way but in an emotional one. The way Christen touched her and closed her eyes from the intensity of Tobin's movement, the way they smiled almost shyly at each other before going again and the way they always made sure the other was doing okay, without needing to ask. 

Christen just laughed to herself in the car. She thought that if someone could see her right now, they'd think she was loosing her mind and, who knows, maybe they weren't so far away from the truth. She didn't mean to go to Tobin's and make love. That actually wasn't part of the plan at all but if Tobin's arrival in her life taught her something, it was that plans and rules and limits, need to be contextualized and emotions? Need to be trusted. She wanted to be mad at her for leaving the company without a reason, for thinking that she couldn't change her mind and mostly, for thinking that the moments and kisses and conversations, weren't as important to Christen as they were to her. Which was a lie, obviously. Christen didn't want this story, she didn't even need it but now that she felt so deeply connected with this woman that spent the entire night taking care of her with adoration and sweetness, she din't care about her plans before. Because all it takes is one night, one person, the right person that is willing to fight for you even when you push them away, even when you don't deserve them, to change everything you thought was right or wrong.

Christen arrived just a few minutes before Tobin and she walked in her office. Their day just went like it always did. They worked on their own things and they didn't have the chance of seeing each other until Tobin knocked on her door to spent the same amount of minutes together they always did after a work day, remaining truthful to this new little tradition they had created. 

"Hey, Chris."

"Hey, you." 

"How was your day?" She asked while playing with her hands.

Christen just laughed at the clear discomfort of the woman "Tobin sit down."

After sitting down she laughed. "I think I'm surprised at how normal this all day has been and now I'm trying to ruining it, you know?"

Here she was, the usual, confident and teasing Tobin. The CEO rolled her eyes and nodded. "Right. I'm almost done by the way."

"Cool. Do you want to come over for dinner? We'll just order something real quick."

"Sure, that sounds great." 

Tobin just smiled and waited for her to finish whatever she was doing. When Christen got up, ready to go and Tobin stopped with an hand on the handle without opening the doore, she looked up at her with a questioning look.

"Can I have a kiss, please?" She asked smiling from ear to ear.

"Nope." Christen said laughing and opened the door herself.

Tobin just shook her head and followed her.

"Tobs, I'm going home first so I can take a shower. I'll see you later at your place?"

"Are you sure? You can take one at my place, you know?" she said before watching Christen's face and roll her eyes. "We can go at your place if that's better for you."

Christen smiled and nodded. "Thanks!"

After eating and telling each other about their day, sitting comfortably on Christen's couch, they both got rid of the take out boxes and faced each other to talk about everything they needed to.

"I'll go first." Tobin said "I wanted to apologize for almost leaving the company. It was childish and I don't know what I was thinking."

"What clicked inside of you that made you think: 'I can't do this'?" Christen asked softly.

"That's gonna sound stupid but after the date we had, I kinda thought that everything was going fine. I was truly happy, I woke up everytday with a smile, ready to go to work and then see you. That's all I needed. After the accident with the New York Company, I thought that everything was ruined and that you'd go back to ignore me because you needed to focus on your job. When I saw you being cold and then I saw you laughing with that dude at the bar, I just stopped thinking and I know...Why are you laughing?"

"Sorry but you being jealous after seeing me laugh with someone is so...You." She bit her lip and tried to stop.

Tobin laughed too "Yeah, I know it sounds ridicoulus and that's why it made me realize that if something that small hurted that much, I couldn't handle you ignoring me." She shrugged and looked back at her.

Christen took a deep breath and began. "I think you know that a relationship is the last thing I was looking for. I always thought that it could ruin my dedication to the company I worked so hard for. But when you came along, I guess..." She looked around. "I don't know, I guess that the way we interacted on the professional level made me realize that it could totally be possible to be your friend as well and nothing changed, you know?" She looked at her.

Tobin was smiling and nodding "Yeah, I know."

"I still think that sometimes. That this is a mistake but then when we're working, we're both focused on our job and everything goes smoothly and that's why when you asked me on a date I accepted without even thinking about it."

"Yeah, that surprised me. The first time we went out I knew you wanted to decline but accepted just because I made you. I always felt like I was just a coworker and you regretted the kiss but I pushed those thoughts away because being with you felt so good..."

Christen smiled at that. "I know that I always pushed you away and that's because you made me feel things that scared me, so I tried to ignore them. But after that date I think I officially accepted that I didn't want to give up what we had."

"Neither do I." Tobin whispered. They smiled at each other for a while before she took the younger woman's hand in hers and said. "I think we should try to make this work. I'd love for us so build something solid even if it might be hard at first."

"Yeah, me too. But you need to understand that our professional relationship has nothing to do with us as a couple. We both need to learn that, of course, but you running away when I'm treating you just like another coworker that made your same mistake is just...wrong. If you do something wrong professionally I have to tell you and viceversa."

"I know Chris. You wouldn't be the amazing CEO that you're if you didn't do that. I promise, I can take it now that I know where we stand."

"I know you can.”

Tobin sighed and rolled her eyes. “Are we done?”

“What do you mean?” Tobin just pulled her hand until Christen was close enough to hug her waist. The younger woman started laughing. “What?”

“You’re beautiful.” Tobin said close to her lips before kissing her. 

They spent some hours making out and watching trashy TV shows while laughing and just enjoying their new dinamic. Finally enjoying their new dinamic. Tobin looked at the time and if she wanted to get enough sleep, she knew she had to go. With a sigh she stood up and said “I have to go. It’s getting late and I need to rest in order to be the best operation menager you all know and love.”

Christen rolled her eyes and laughed. “Sure Heath, whatever you say.”

Tobin just laughed and offered an hand to help her up. They walked to the door and shared a sweet kiss. “See you tomorrow, pretty girl.”

“Drive safe, text me when you’re home.” 

Tobin nodded with a smile and a wink before leaving. Christen couldn’t help but laugh when she was lying in bed. Quite eventful couple of days, huh?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> I didn't expect to post this chapter so early and I don't think you did either but anxiety is literally eating me alive and writing is the only thing that makes me escape reality.  
> As always, I love you guys and I appreciate your kind words more than I can explain!  
> Have a nice day and stay positive!


	10. Why are you smiling like that?

More than a week went by and nothing really changed. Work was still work. Personal life was still personal. Christen and Tobin spent as much time together as possible and between laughters and deep conversation, both were more than convinced that there was no way that this relationship wasn't worth fighting for. No one knew about it yet around the company and they both felt like it was the best thing to do. Besides Christen treated everyone the same way from the newest member to the older one, so no one realized anything and even if they did, it didn't matter. 

"Hey Ali! Is Chris inside?"

"Yeah, go ahead!" Ali said with a smile. "Oh, we're waiting for you outside like always, okay?"

Tobin looked a bit surprised. "Oh, yeah I mean...I'm just gonna ask Christen, you know...um."

Ali just tilted her head to the side. "Why would you? She never comes to the club."

"Y-Yeah, I know. I just...I don't know if I'm done with work so, I don't know if I'll come to the club tonight." Tobin said in the most confident voice she could manage in that moment.

Ali didn't look convinced but nodded. "Okay. Are you okay after what happened with Allie and you?"

Tobin wanted to laugh but she just smiled. "Yeah, all good. Have fun!"

They hugged and Tobin walked in Christen's office and, as soon as the door was closed, she sighed. 

Christen looked up "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah. I didn't know what we'd do tonight."

"Oh, aren't you going out?"

"That was the plan but I wanted to check in with you first and Ali started asking me why so I just said that I need to work so you're stuck with me." She shrugged getting closer to Christen's side and bent down to kiss her cheek, putting a hand on the back of her chair to stay stable. "Hi."

The younger woman smiled at her and kissed her lips. "Hi."

They set for a while, with Tobin helping with a few documents before leaving. When they were making their way out, Tobin asked "Do you want to do something tonight or you're too tired for that?"

"No, I'd like to do something."

"Well, I'd like to take you to dinner, even if it's a little late." She said while putting her hands on the woman's hips.

"I never said I wanted do to something with you, Heath." Christen said with a teasing tone and a little smile.

Tobin rolled her eyes. "Press you're dying to spend time with me, don't try to deny it."

"God, you're so full of yourself."

"No, I'm not!" She replied with a fake offended face. "Okay, whatever. I'll see you on Monday." She turned around and took a couple of steps before stopping. "You're not going to stop me?"

They were both laughing, expecially Christen who couldn't stop being tickled by the woman's antics. She was something else. "Let's go, idiot." She said when she got closer to Tobin and kissed her cheek.

After dinner, Tobin drove back Christen to her car that was still outside of their work place. The morning after they met again at Christen's place to have breakfast together. After eating and talking for a while, they set in the living room each working on their own laptop, sitting close on the couch. Tobin, once in a while, would stop typing to kiss the woman's shoulder or temple. Watching her work in her office was one thing but being here, close to her while she was working in comfortable clothes in her own place, was another. She loved this development. Christen would still bite her bottom lip when she was concentrating on something but now Tobin could kiss her to make her stop, and she did. Every time.  
Christen acted like she was annoyed by it but she wasn't at all. Doing nothing with Tobin was beautiful. Sitting in silence without feeling uncomfortable, sharing opinions and advices when the other needed them, teasing and laughing and still being productive when they had to. Again, Tobin had a way of letting her be, that she never felt with anyone else. Sometimes they both felt like they were made to be together, but, neither ready to share that thought with the other, they also knew that it was way deeper than a simple thought or emotion. It was almost an unconscious awareness that they were starting to get used of, even if they weren't able to control it.

"Babe." Tobin said, not even realizing how she had just called her.

Christen smiled and looked up from the screen of her laptop. "Yeah?"

Tobin looked up to "Why are you smiling like that?"

"Nothing, just...nothing." She tried to hide her smile and look back at the screen.

"What?"

"You just called me babe, Tobs."

Tobin's eyes almost widened before remembering that now she could so she shrugged "Whatever." She knew she was blushing like a teenager so she asked the question she wanted to ask in the first place. "What are we doing tonight?"

"Oh, about that. I think we have movie night at Megan's." She closed her laptop and put it away before she turned on her side, facing Tobin.

"Great. I have to go to the wine pub. Me and the guys have to shedule next week arrivals."

"Oh wow, that's interesting. Tell me more about that place, please?"

Tobin closed her laptop as well and kissed her on the forehead after facing her. She started talking about her passion for wine, how she had that in common with her dad and how a friend of a friend had a project that she immediately fell in love with. They had lunch together. Christen cooked while Tobin watched, smiling at how amazing the woman looked while doing something so simple like cookig. Every once in a while, her thoughts would go back to the night she had the honor to touch that body and make it hers, not in a objectify way, more in a loving one. When that happened, Christen somehow knew because she’d call her ‘creep’ but she’d kiss her with a smile right after so Tobin didn’t care about the teasing. They ate and talked, trying to extend their time together as much as possible before Tobin got back to her place. 

When Christen knocked on the door, she was greeted by an excited Megan with a glass of wine.

"Chris! You're here." She almost screamed, hugging the woman.

"Hey Meg, drunk already?" Christen said laughing.

"No! How dare you. Come in."

"Hi ladies!" Christen waved at the group, watching Sue and Ash discuss God knows what and Ali rolling her eyes at the two.

"Hi sweetie, how are you?" Ali said when Christen set to her left.

"Good. What about you? What's happening there?" She pointed to the two other women.

"Sports. I don't know."

Christen laughed and nodded before Megan came back with a wine glass for her. The group started talking animnatedly about whatever topic came up until Ash said something that irreversibly changed everything.

"God, this wine is so bad. I should have brought the one that Tobin got me at my birthday party."

"Sorry but this isn't some expensive classy wine. It's just a normal one so..." Megan shrugged. Christen was silent even if the mention of the woman's name caught her attention. She knew that it was just a simple observation from Ash but she also knew that Megan was already a little out of it thanks to the alchol and, let's be real, even if she wasn't, she would never pass an opportunity to tease Christen on the remote idea of being into someone, so the ceo wasn't that surprised when she heard her next words. "By the way, I even spoke with Julie about it and the plan of getting you two together is still on so..."

Christen just took another sip and looked down at the glass to hide her smile while talking as slowly as possible "Not that you really need to...but okay."

There was soft music playing in the back, Ash playfully arguing with Sue, Ali trying to get both woman to stop screaming just a moment before, but apparantly everyone heard that. Ali looked at her before asking gently.

"I'm sorry, what did you just say?"

"Nothing. Just...nothing." She took a sip and looked around, biting her lip while blushing.

"Christen?" said Sue with a tone that meant 'spill or we'll force you'.

Christen closed her eyes, took a deep breath and turned around to face the group again. "Yeah...Well, me and Tobin, we're kind of already together so... You don't really need to do that." When she looked at those shocked faces she couldn't help but laugh. Megan stopped with her glass mid air before it could reach her lips, Sue had the biggest smile on and Ash and Ali let theit mouth fall open. Megan spoke first.

"What?"

"Yeah..."

"You are together. Like, in a relationship? Like you kiss, fuck and do all those couply stuff."

"Oh my god." Christen laughed throwing her head back and closing her eyes. "You guys are too much!"

"Why didn't you tell me? I can't believe you kept it from me." Ali said with a surprised voice more than an angry one.

"I don't know, it's new. It happened very recently and I'm still getting used to it. We work together and all that so--"

"WAIT. WAIT." Ashlyn screamed standing up. "How-When did that happen?"

So Christen told them everything from the begining. The chemistry, the teasing, the long conversations, the fight, the kiss, the dates and almost dismissal (leaving out the sex part, choosing to go home with her ears still working). Ali knew a lot of the things that happened but not all of it. At the end she just stood up and hugged Christen, whispering that she was proud of her for listening to her heart. 

"Why didn't you bring her tonight?!" Megan asked.

"Just because we're together doesn't mean we can't hang out with our friends separately." She rolled her eyes. "Besides, she had things to do with the co-owners of her wine pub."

"I know! But like, we want her here. You should bring her next week." 

"Yeah, I agree. Girl is fire, I like her." Ash said nodding.

"Okay..." Christen said smiling shyly at knowing that her friends approved the person she was seeing.

"Not to mention, she deserves it. She's been pining over you since the first day and you did nothing but being a bi-"

"Ali! That's not true!" Christen said with an offended expression, making all the others laugh.

When the laughters slowly disappeard Megan shook her head. "Can you believe that Miss coldhearted 'I don't want a relationship I'm happy by mayself' is falling in love? WITH A COWORKER!"

"Woah! I never said anything about love. I don't even know what I'm doing guys. Somtimes I think that I'm making a huge mistake and that I'll regret it and hurt her and I really don--" Christen started rambling.

"Pressy, fuck! Who cares! Just enjoy it for god's sake!" Megan replied, putting her hands on the woman's shoulders and shaking her. 

"Okay, okay! Stop!" Christen said laughing and pushing Megan away.

When they were all tired and Ali, Ash and Christen stood up to leave, Megan and Sue were hugging each of them to say good night. When it was Christen’s turn to hug Megan, the older woman whispered

“Good night Chris. Relax and have fun with your new hot girl. I’m sure she’s great to have fun with.” 

When they pulled back, she was smirking proudly and when she saw that Christen’s cheeks were on fire, her eyes went wide and she screamed.

“NO! You already—” the rest of the words went directly in Christen’s hand that was now copping her mouth.

The others were looking at them being weird but when Megan was involved, there wasn’t much to be surprised about. So Ali and Ash said another loud ‘bye’ before leaving. Christen quickly hugged Sue and left as well but not before hearing Megan say in a teasing tone

“Pressy, that conversation isn’t even close to being over!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!   
> This chapter needed to exist, right? I think it was only fair to write and also (hopefully) fun to read about her friends reactions.  
> In the next one I'm focusing almost exclusively on them as a couple. I always make sure to describe how their thoughts about the other are progressing through the story but I think is also important to talk about their relationship/feelings growth as a reality and not just ideas...? Does that makes sense to you? (Idk, I'm really bad at this, sorry lol)  
> Anyway, I hope you have nice day! Let me know what you think!  
> All my love to you guys, stay safe!


	11. It's not like they couldn't tell.

"Do you know what day it is?"

"Friday."

Tobin rolled her eyes "Yeah, I know that but do you know what day it is?"

Christen just paused the movie and turned around to look at Tobin that was pressed to her side with an arm around her shoulders. "No..."

"Last month on this day we had our first official date at the Luna Park." Tobin said smiling.

Christen eyes went wide "It's already been a month? Wow..."

"Are you telling me that you're already tired of me?"

"No!" Christen said before smiling teasingly "But now that I really think about it..."

"Shut up." Tobin said, smiling back at her and taking the remote to let the movie keep playing. 

Christen just kept thinking about how weird it was for her to realize that more than a month ago she threw caution out of the window, she let her feelings win and her rational side lose control. She had no idea how good it could feel to actually be with Tobin and now she couldn't even think about the idea of putting her rules first and let the opportunity to have this woman, slip away. If she really thought about it, it wasn't that long that they started dating and they were already more than comfortable around each other. A small part of her was still afraid that they were going too fast but not for stereotypical couple staff (considering that they slept together basically right away and never done it since), but for feeling free to be themselves without embarassment. One month sounded a long time and a short time all at once but considering that they had been knowing each other for a couple of months before ending up together, it wasn't anything to worry about. Overthinking was a real problem for Christen but only when Tobin wasn't around. As soon as the woman was with her, all her thoughts disappeared. It had been that way, since the first moment. She loved how Tobin respected and accepted every part of her being in the same way: the professional and demanding part, the funny and teasing part, the goofy and sweet part. Probably, the reason they were already so comfortable was that they were coworkers and friends and then became something more. She smiled at the thought and kissed her jaw. Tobin looked at her and smiled back before kissing her. 

Tobin deep down knew that she would never get used to that: Kissing Christen whenever she wanted to. Sometimes, it all felt unrealistic to her, being here in her home, with this amazing woman by her side. She loved everything about it, the way Christen listened to her without judgment, the way she'd smile when she really wanted to prove a point and succeded in changing Tobin's mind about it, the way she never once made Tobin feel less or wrong in any way. She wouldn't say that she needed Christen to be happy now but that this woman defenitely made her realize that there was a side of happiness that she never felt before and that scared her in a way. Maybe she was going too fast, maybe Christen didn't have those deep feelings for her or she wasn’t as sure as she was but even if that was true, Tobin didn't care because she felt lucky and grateful just to have met her. If you really think about it meeting the right person at the right time is very very hard but here they were, one hundred reasons to be apart and not a single one mattered. She had been in a long term relationship before and she had projects and ideas with that person but her feelings weren't even close to what she was feeling now. It didn't necessarily mean that she was already in love or sure about wanting to marry Christen the next day but it meant that everything inside herself felt like being to Christen's side was exactly where she was supposed to be and she respect it.

“What are you doing tomorrow?” Christen said smiling but keeping her eyes on the TV screen.

“Mh… I don’t know, why?”

“Good. I’ll take you out.”

Tobin turned her head to look at the little smile on the woman that refused to look back at her. “You’re taking me out?” Christen nodded and kept watching the movie until Tobin kissed her cheek and whispered “Do you have a crush on me or something?” making the woman laugh. 

When she stopped she met Tobin’s eyes “I just want to take you out. Is it that weird?” Of course it wasn’t. They had been on a lot of little dates together but the simple fact that Christen was asking so seriously like it was their first ever date, was funny and adorable to Tobin.

“No, I’m honored. Christen Press is asking me out. Like a date, just me and her…Wow.”

“Okay, fine. I don’t want to anymore.” Christen said, going back to the movie.

Tobin couldn’t help but smile when she noticed how her cheeks were slightly red. “Where are you taking me?”

“Nowhere, sorry. I changed my mind.” Christen said with a shrug pretending to be focused on the movie that they both forgot of.

“Oh yeah? Okay.” Tobin turned around and picked the woman up with an arm under the back of her knees and another around her back before standing up.

“Put me down!” Christen almost screamed, hugging the woman’s neck.

“Nope, tell me you’re still taking me out and I will.”

“Oh my God, are you serious? You’re a child I—" The words died in her mouth when Tobin faked to loose her grip and drop her. “TOBIN!”

The older woman was laughing, throwing her head back. Christen looked so cute and it was quite entertaining to look at her like that. “Say it!”

Christen rolled her eyes with a smile. “Okay Heath, I’m taking you out but only because you forced me.”

“Yeah sure, whatever you need to say to yourself.” She took a minute to just stare at the woman in her arms, at her eyes, smile and blushed cheeks. “You’re beautiful, Chris.” She whispered before kissing her, feeling that smile pressed on her own lips. The sweet moment broke when Tobin’s phone rang. She rolled her eyes and gently let Christen down to see who was calling. “Mh, my sister is face-timing me, sorry.”

“Don’t be, just answer.” Christen said after giving her a kiss on the cheek and going back to the couch.

Tobin accepted the call and immediately saw her sister on the screen. “Hey Per.” She said almost shyly at having to speak to her family with Christen there. The younger woman understood before Tobin could say anything and she got up before pointing in the kitchen’s direction. Tobin just shook her head and grabbed Christen’s wrist, indicating that she wanted her there, so Christen just set down again. “What’s up?”

“Hey Tobs! Nothing new. What are you doing?”

“Mh… I was just…watching a movie.” She said, sitting down at Christen’s side without letting her in the screen.

“Okay cool. So how is work?” Her sister asked.

“Oh good, you know I like it here.” Tobin was internally just praying for her sister to not mention Christen, since they had spoke about it the week before, so she just changed subject. Or at least, she tried to. “So how are my favorite little dudes?”  
“Oh they’re napping right now. That’s why I called you now, we can speak without isterical kids running around. They have your energy I swear.” She laughed.

Christen couldn’t help but smile at the idea of Tobin’s nephews being similar to her. The older woman shared a lot about her family but seeing her interacting with her sister, just reminded her of what type of person Tobin was. A very sweet and caring one. 

“I know…I miss having them around.” Thinking about her favorite kids, made her forget one of the reasons she asked about them in that moment. Of course her sister reminded her.

“So, how are things with Christen?”

Christen raised her eyebrows with a small smile, watching Tobin’s cheeks burn and trying to control the enormous desirer of kissing her, right there, in front of her sister. She stood up, understanding that it was time to give them a little privacy but Tobin just sighed and stopped her with an hand on her thigh.

“You know what? Just stay, she’s gonna torture me anyway so we might as well—”

“Wait! Is Christen there? Are you, like, hiding her or something?! That’s rude, let me meet her!” Her sister screamed from the other side of the phone.

Tobin rolled her eyes before sighing again and angling the phone so her and Christen could both be on the screen. “Please Per, just please, don’t say anyth—”

“You’re so pretty! Hi, I’m Perry, how are you?” She said in a teasing and confident tone just a big sister could use.

Christen laughed at the expression on Tobin’s face and waved. “Hey, nice to meet you! I’m really good actually, we were just watching a movie.”

“Aw, that’s so sweet! Tobin said so many things about y—”

“Okay! That was fun, Per! Call me later. Bye!” Tobin said, interrupting her sister and ending the call.

Christen just laughed and put her arms around Tobin’s shoulders. “Big sisters are somthing else, huh?” She said from her own experience.  
“Yeah, sorry.”

Christen just shook her head and kissed her forehead with a big smile still on her face. “What are you apologizing for?” 

Tobin moved on her side to completely face Christen, hugging her waist after the woman did the same. “I don’t know. I guess I’m not ready yet for you two to gang up against me.” She shrugged and kissed the woman until a new text interrupted them. Again. When Tobin read it, she rolled her eyes before showing it to Christen: ‘That was rude Toby. Anyway, she’s so pretty! Same time tomorrow? Pleaseee’. 

Christen laughed at the text, noticing that her sisters just had about the same reaction when they found out she was finally seeing someone and they instantly asked to meet her even if it was way too early for that. She kissed Tobin and whispered on her lips “Toby, huh?” watching the woman roll her eyes and stand up to make some tea. She knew that, deep down, Tobin loved that interaction. It 

After Christen went home that night, Tobin couldn’t help but think about the day and specifically the call with her sister. She asked herself if Christen talked about her with her sisters too, so when they were having dinner the night after, she brought it up.

“So, was it weird yesterday? I mean, talking with my sister?” 

“No, why it should had been?” Christen asked with a confused face.

“I don’t know, just asking.” Tobin said, not really knowing how to ask if Christen thought it was too soon or if she was in this as much as her. Rationally, she knew that Christen was, they had also talked about it but Tobin remembered very clearly that the woman didn’t want a relationship before and even if she was now more confident in their feelings for each other, sometimes she was more insecure that she’d like to admit.

Christen somehow felt it, which made Tobin remember how amazing the woman in front of her was. “I mean, she acted exactly like my sister would. They tease me about you too, you know.”

Tobin smiled at that “Oh, so they do know about me.”

“Of course they do. Not everything and not in ditails since it’s pretty new, but it’s not like they couldn’t tell. I don’t know if you know this but, dating wasn't really my thing before.” She winked making Tobin laugh.

She sighed with a smile while looking straight at her before speaking with a sweet voice “Thank you for telling me.”

“Welcome.” She smiled, knowing that Tobin was thanking her for more than just confessing that her sisters knew about them. “This is so good, by the way.” She said bringing another spoon full on chocolate to her mouth.

“Mine is too, do you want some?” And just like that, they got back to talk just like they did the whole night. When they made their way out, Tobin put her hands ont he woman’s hips before she could reach the car and kissed her. “Thank you for dinner, babe.”

“Oh so, you force me to take you out and then thank me?” Christen replied with a tesing smile, kissing her again. “You're sweet. Let’s go.” She took her hand and walked to Tobin’s car.  
When they arrived to the younger woman’s house, Tobin just kept the engine on, ready to go home after dropping the woman off, wishing she could stay after the amazing and somehow special night they had but not knowing if they were there yet. Even if they had already slept together once, they were always making sure not to rush anything after that and neither ever stayed over in order to prevent to get even more domestic that they already were. At the end of the day, they knew each other enough to have a good trust and communication. They were adults and obviously interested in creating a lasting relationship so Christen spoke easily.

“You could just stay tonight.”

“Yeah, okay.” Tobin said after swallowing.

When they walked in the house, Christen noticed immediately ho nervous the woman was and she was too. “It’s just me Tobs.” She said after getting close to her. Tobin just nodded and kissed her. 

That night felt like more than the first one. It felt like a promise to stay through the fear of losing the other, it felt like confidence that they could make anything work together and willingness to fight no matter what. It felt like a lot of things that were very close to love. So close that they could taste it on each other’s lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!  
> I waited before posting this because I wanted it to be exactly like I visualized it in my mind, so sorry about that!  
> I really hope you liked this chapter and that I found a good balance between sweetness and mature development of the relationship. Some people asked me if I'll ever write something about one of them asking the other to be 'girlfriends' or something like that and honestly, for the way I'm seeing this story, that's not really something I'm planning to do. I feel like they know what they are and already consider the other a girlfriend, if that makes any sense to you guys... Do you think I should consider writing something like that? Lmk!  
> Have a nice day and stay safe!
> 
> P.S. I'm still Italian lol. I know I made some stupid mistakes in this entire story and I'll fix them one day hahah.


	12. No need? Are you fucking kidding me?

Another month went by. Tobin and Christen were stronger than ever even if the younger woman still had some moments in which she had doubts about being able to be in a relationship and be the best ceo of the company she could be. In those moments Tobin always made sure to reassure her that they were in this together, that whenever she felt like this relationship was limiting her, they could talk about it and try to change things. Christen knew deep down that everything was fine, bacuse it felt good and right but changing your mind about something can be hard and challenging in werid ways. After listening to all her worries, Julie and Megan just rolled their eyes with a "so what?" look and cracked a couple of jokes about Tobin being too hot to care about all of that. It always made Christen smile because, well, where was the lie? Ali on the other hand, made sure to underline how she was as good as a ceo as she always had and that it had already been weeks since they started dating and nothing changed in the company. Christen appreciated her a lot for it. Ash and Sue were supportive and after Tobin hang out with the enitre gang one weekend, they got along so well that they secretly hoped that they'd stay together as long as possible. Christen could tell that Tobin fit in her life perfectly and viceversa. Tobin's childhood friends added her to their group chat in which they'd tease Tobin about how weird it was that she managed to land a woman that was obviously way out of her league and how ready they were to meet her in person if she came back home with Tobin. Christen laughed at their texts and learned about their life.  
Tobin was so happy with her that sometimes it overwhelmed her.  
It took one missed call in the middle of night for that happiness to evaporate and for everything to fall apart.

"Hey Allie, did you see Ali?"

"Hey Tobs. No, she'd not here yet."

"Okay, thanks." Tobin smiled politely and made her way towards Christen's office. 

Christen didn't respond to her texts the night before and she figured that she fell asleep early and that they'd see each other the next morning anyway. She fell asleep without charging her phone and when she woke up, she found it dead. She connected it to her car battery while she drove to work, just long enough to see no texts from Christen and a missed call from Ali past midnight. 'I'll see her in 5 minutes and ask her about it' she thought. Now Ali's chair was empty just like Christen's office. She walked to her office, took her phone and called Ali.

"Tobs."

"Ali, hi! I was looking for you but you're not here so I th-"

"Tobin." Voice almost cracking.

"Ali? Where are you?" Tobin asked confused after noticing that she sounded like she was crying in a huge empy room.

"I'm at the hospital, Tobs, I--"

"What? What happened? Are you okay?"

"Yes." She took a deep breath. "Tobin, Christen got into a car accident last night."

Tobin's heart stopped beating. She could feel the world slow down and the next breath of air take minutes, hours, before filling her lungs again. Eyes unable to blink, muscles unable to relax. "W-what?"

"She...I don't know, they don't let me see her!" Ali was crying hard now, Tobin could hear Ashlyn trying to calm her down. "I-Her car is completely smashed and t-they called me but we aren't blood related and I'm s-scared I--"

"I'm coming." Tobin said firmly, ready to hang up and fucking run out to drive as fast as possible to her.

"Tobs, don't." Now it was Ashlyn talking on the other end. "We're here and her family is on ther way, right now. The doctors aren't letting you in and it--"

"What am I supposed to do?" Tobin whispered, feeling her legs give out. She wasn't expecting anything like that that day and not knowing what was going on was excruciating enough without feeling absolutely useless, sitting in her office without doing anything but think about the possible millions of reasons that could force her girlfriend to be closed in an hospital room with no one by her side. 

"Stay there. I- We don't know, okay? Maybe she's fine." Ash tried to sound positive but they wouldn't let only family members in if she was uninjured.

"Ash, what? I can't, I need to- I have to...Fuck" She shut her eyes tightly, wishing it was a dream.

"Tobin, I know you're worried but I can assure you that staying there is the right thing for now, okay? It'll take you 45 minutes to arrive here and for nothing. You're too overwhelmed to drive and there's no need for you to. I can im--"

"No need? Are you fucking kidding me?" Tobin almost sceamed, still not knowing how to feel.

"I'm sorry. I'll call you as soon as we know something. You need to trust me, okay?" Ash said before hanging up.

Tobin set on her chair and covered her face with her hands. She kept thinking that maybe if she had answered her phone this night, now she could have been by her side, understand what was happening. She saw her yesterday, after she was done with her work. They spent some time together like they always did. Christen was preparing the plan for today's meeting with an important company she always wanted to work with. Tobin joked about every company being jealous of this company's ceo to ease her tension. Christen just rolled her eyes but smiled. Then they kissed and drove away. She thought about the chance of that being their last kiss and a shiver ran down her back. She shook her head and opened her water bottle. Not possible.

Allie walked in "Hey Tobs, did you see Christen? The meeting is-- hey, are you okay?" She got closer until she could put a hand on her shoulder. "Tobin, you're pale. You look sick, do y--"

"I'm okay. What happened?"

"The meeting is starting. Christen didn't answer any of my calls. Should I cancel--"

"No. We're doing it without her."

"What? We don't even have the plan, how--"

"I do. We'll close the deal." Tobin said firmly before standing up and walking to the bathroom. She washed her face with cold water and took three deep breaths. She needed to do something today to take her mind off what was going on 45 minutes away. This was important to Christen, she worked hard. She needed to close this deal.

Obviuosly she did it. Everyone was amazed by her smiley and confident self leading the meeting like it was just an everyday thing to her. At soon as the meeting ended, her smile disappeared so fast, it looked scary. She took all her stuff and left the room. They were all pretty worried and when they left the room as well, they saw her pacing in the hall back and forth, looking desperate. 

"Are you okay?" Allie asked with some of the other coworkers beside her.

"Yes, yes. I'm okay. I think I'll check the documents and then-then I don't know, I could do so much, I-" She tried to respond without making eye contact with anyone, still walking and keeping a tight hold on her phone.

"What happened? You’re freaking us out." Allie said, getting close and putting both of her hands on the woman's shoulders.

Tobin just stopped and covered her face with her hands. After taking a deep breath, she looked up at them and spoke with a scared voice, like saying those words out loud would make everything suddenly more real. "Chris got into a car accident last night and I don't know how she is or what happened."

All the eyes in the hall went wide. Allie opened her mouth but was cut off by Tobin's phone ringing. Tobin immediately picked up. "Ali, what happened?" 

"Hi, I just called to let you know that Christen is fine and th-"

"I'm coming." Tobin said before hanging up without giving Ali the chance of stopping and running out, leaving questioning voice behind that didn't matter right now. Nothing mattered right now.

The car ride was awful. Not knowing was awful. She tried so hard to ignore the thoughts about Christen being in pain, in a hospital bed, in the middle of the fucking night, without no one by her side. She hated that she let her phone die and missed Ali’s call. She knew that maybe things weren’t as bad in reality as they were in her head but her brain couldn’t help but panic. Christen was one of the most important people in her life and just thinking about losing her or someone hurting her, made her sick. Everything about Christen made her happy. Sometimes she really asked herself if she knew what happiness and completeness meant before the woman came into her life. She was the happiest she had ever been and imagining a life without her, now, was pointless.  
As soon as she parked she checked her phone and Ali already sent her the floor and room number. She was walking, heart beating out of her chest and clamsy hands that forced her to put her phone in the inner pocket of her jacket. When she got closer Ashlyn spoke.

“Yo, dude. You look like a fucking ghost. Did you eat something?”

“N-No. How is she?” Tobin asked scared, like she didn’t know if she was ready to hear the answer.

“Dude, breathe. She’s fine. She lost consciousness for the impact but the air-bag prevent her from getting any major damage. She broke her arm and she scratched her face a little bit. That’s it.”

“Oh my God. That’s bad. How? I mean what?” 

Ashlyn looked at her, panicked eyes and hands going trough her hair and couldn’t help but smile a little. “I swear, you’re even worse than Ali. You look like a lost puppy, you’re losing your cool, dude.” She tried to joke but when she saw that Tobin had the same expression she pointed to the room. “Let’s go.”

Tobin hesitated. She fucking hated hospitals but she wanted to see Christen so she followed Ashlyn inside. Christen was lying down, covered by white sheets, smiling at Ali’s words while holding her hand. When she looked up at Tobin, the older woman could see a bandage that covered the left side of her face, close to the end of her eye, that went from the middle oher cheek, up to her tample. Left shoulder and arm, wrapped in a bandage, hand invisible because hidden under the sheets. She freezed and her eyes became watery. Watching her woman in that bed, fisically pained her.

Christen just smiled. “I’m okay, come here.”

Tobin got closer and stood beside Ali that stood up to let her sit instead. Before Tobin could refuse, she pushed her on the chair. “Me and Ash are going to bring some food okay? We’ll have lunch together.” With on last pat on her shoulder, she left the room.

Tobin took Christen’s hand but didn’t meet her gaze. “That’s how you look after a work day without me, Heath?” The younger woman said to try to enlight the mood a little bit.

Tobin tried to smile but she swallowed and kept analyzing the woman’s hand. Christen gave her time to process. This was the first time she saw Tobin being so vulnerable and hurt and scared. Finally she looked up and sighed “Sorry, I know I should be the one making you smile b-but I hate hospitals and when Ali called me I was- I didn’t know what happened and I don’t-I didn’t—”

“It’s okay, baby.” Christen said, watching Tobin stand up and lean foward to kiss her lips and her forehead.

“I was so scared. You have no idea how sorry I am.” She said after sitting down again and wiping her tears away.

“About what?”

“Ali called me last night but my phone turned off and I—”

“Tobin, it doesn’t matter! Calm down, I’m fine, everything is fine. I just have a fucked up face now.” She shrugged.

“You’re always the prettiest girl around.”

“Here she is, Heath is back!” Christen laughed and made Tobin laugh too, for the first time since the night before. All it took was Christen’s smile to make her happy again.

Ali and Ashlyn walked in with take out and they set from the other side of the bed. When everyone was ready to eat Ashlyn made everyone laugh with a “Tell us what the fuck happened and don’t you dare say ‘car accident’. We want details.” 

“There isn’t much to say. I was going home after work and a drunk asshole didn’t stop at a red light. I was driving normally and then he came in full speed from my right side. He pushed my car into another and my air-bag opened. I panicked for two seconds before loosing consciousness. Apparantly the car behind me couldn't stop in time and hit mine as well because when I opened my eyes they told me that in that car there was a whole family and the drunk guy was in danger of life. That's why they made everyone wait outside. I'm just happy that I was the only one in the car, I got hurt from hitting the car on the left after the impact but if someone was on the passenger seat, they’d be dead right now. So, that’s it.”

“Gosh, I’m so glad you’re okay.” Tobin said after a moment of silence, getting up and kissing her forehead again, shocked by the story.

“Yeah, me too. I wish my arm and car were fine as well.”

“You’re car is completely gone, dude.” Ashlyn said with a mouth full of food, earning a slap on the arm from Ali.

Christen chuckled. “Yeah, dad told me.”

“Oh, what about your arm?” Ali asked.

“I need surgery.”

Tobin stopped chewing “What? Surgery? Like…Like you’ll be asleep and they’ll open it?”

The three women laughed at Tobin’s face and question. “Yes Tobin.”

“God, I’m going to die, waiting for you to get out of that hell.” She shook her head with a seriousness that made everyone laugh again. How could someone be that cool and sweet at the same time? Christen didn’t know.


	13. Mum says you're beautiful.

"I think it's time to go home, sweetheart." Ashlyn said standing up after spending hours with Tobin and Christen.

"No, I can stay until her family is done with work." Ali said easily.

"Ali, please just go. You've been here all night. I'm okay and you need some sleep. So does Ashlyn." Christen said before hearing Tobin continue.

"I'll stay with Christen anyway, so you can go."

"You can go too, Tobin. Y'all heard the doc: no surgery until tomorrow so..." 

"I'm staying." Tobin insisted.

Ali felt better after hearing that Tobin would stay with her friend, so she stood up to hug Christen tightly and dismiss all her 'thank you for everything' the girl was repeating and left with Ashlyn, happy that everything wasn't as bas as she thought in the beggining.  
As soon as the door closed, Christen sighed and looked ad the ceiling. After waking up and understanding what happened and how lucky she was to be alive, she was just relieved and careless. Now, hearing Ali mention her sister and dad being at work, she remembered how many work she had left and what exactly she missed this morning.

"What's wrong? Does it hurt?" Tobin asked concerned.

"No. I'm just thinking about the company and all the things I have to do. I have my laptop still in my office and I should prob--"

Tobin rolled her eyes. "That's not important right now, Chris."

"I know! I'm just saying that I can work on my laptop with my right hand. Besides, I need to anyway. I can't just skip it."

"We'll figure something out."

"And I just missed the meeting with the company I've worked for ages to collab with. Great." She sighed again and covered her face with her hand.

Tobin suddenly felt uncomfortable. She knew she overstepped. An operation menager leading a meeting planned and organized by the CEO in every little ditails. But it ended up working so her reaction couldn't be that bad, right? She cleared her throat. "Yeah...About that."

Christen head snapped to her. "What?"

"I...I kind of- I mean, I knew it was important to you and you were here and I didn't know what to do. I was panicking and being unproductive all day felt like a nightmare so-" She swallowed and looked up. "So, I opened the meeting anyway."

"You what?"

"I know, I know I shouldn't have. But you worked so hard and we reviewed the plan together for the last week so I thought I could give it a shot. You know how hard it is to have the opportunity to have a link from that company, Chris. God only knows how many months it'd take to have another meeting with them, so I--"

"You closed a deal for me when I couldn't be there?" Christen said with a surprised voice and a smile slowly spreading on her face.

"Y-yeah." 

The woman just took Tobin's hand and pulled her until she could kiss her. She shook her head and put her arm around the woman's neck to keep her close. "You're incredible Heath." She whispered before kissing her.

Tobin smiled and kissed her back. "So you're not mad?"

"No! How could I be mad about that?"

"I don't know. It's not really my place. But I'm happy I did. I was going crazy not knowing how things were here." She set on the bed to Christen's right side and put an arm around her waist kissing her temple. "Hey, how did you know I closed the deal?"

"I have worked with you enough to know how good you are. I mean not as good as me but you know, you try." She shrugged teasingly.

Tobin just shook her head and kissed her, without even thinking about denying it because Christen was, in fact, better than her. Christen was better than everyone to her eyes.

"Thank you, Tobs. You have no idea how much that means to me." She said while they shared a hug.

"I'm just happy you're okay, babe. I was so fucking scared. I-I couldn't even think about you being-- being alone here and I-I couldn't do anything. I felt so hopeless, not knowing. I don't know what I'd do without you I-"

"It's okay, baby. I'm fine." Christen interrupted her, feeling how tight Tobin was holding her and how overwhelmed she sounded. 

They stayed like that for a while, just breathing each other in, kissing softly and feeling the comfort of having the other in their arms and finally feeling safe. Tobin's sister chose that time to call.

"It's my sister." She accepted the call and sighed. "Oh, look at that! Two at the prize of one. What do you want?" She said trying to sound annoyed at watching her sisters on the screen but happy to see them.

"Rude! We are all together and we to-" Katie said before being interrupted by a screaming Perry.

"OH MY GOD, Toby! Are you in hospital? What happened?"

Quickly followed by an allarmed Mrs. Heath getting close "IN HOSPITAL? WHAT?"

Tobin sighed while Christen tried her best not to laugh both at Tobin's family and Tobin's annoyed face. "Guys, I'm okay! Please stop screaming. Christen had a car accident and I'm visiting her."

"Oh fuck, how is she?" Perry asked and before she could answer, Katie added a "So you are with Christen right now?" And when her brother heard that name, he came over and entered the conversation (because apparantly the words "Tobin in hospital" weren't as interesting as Christen's presence.) "Can we meet her?" followed by a slap from her mum that was actually silently hoping the answer to Jeff's question was yes.  
It was just a big chaos and Christen couldn't take it anymore and started laughing. Tobin was so fucking pissed at her family for not letting her explain and just jumping to being noisy with zero effort, but Christen was laughing which caused her nerves to disappear and shook her head with a smile.

"Soon guys. She needs to rest now." Tobin replied, feeling like Christen could be uncomfortable with the idea of 'meeting' her family while she was in an hospital's bed.

After catching up for some minutes the call ended and Christen spoke. "So your family is really excited to meet me, huh?"

"Yeah. You're their favorite person to talk about. I'm pretty sure they make bets about our relationship's dynamic." She shrugged and smiled shyly before whispering "Mum says you're beautiful."

"Really? That's so sweet!" She saw the text on her phone before looking back at Tobin and give her hand a reassuring squeeze "I can't wait to meet them and I hope you're ready to meet my sisters too because... Well, they're 5 minutes away."

Tobin looked at her with slightly panicked eyes. "Oh. That's okay, I'm ready."

Christen wanted to laugh at how not-ready Tobin looked. It was adorable. "I hope they'll like you. If they don't, things might change between us."

Tobin stared at her before laughing at the teasing. "Stop! Don't make me nervous."

Christen just smiled and kissed her hand before hearing a knock and seeing her sisters walk in. "Hey!"

Tobin stood up and took a couple of steps back so the two women could hug their sister on her uninjured side. Confident Tobin was suddenly gone. She was getting increasingly nervous, scratching the back of her neck and aware of how bad she looked after crying and working and stressing all day. Her thoughts were stopped by Christen's voice.

"Girls, this is Tobin. Tobin, Channing and Tyler." 

After shaking their hands and hoping they didn't think she was weird, she decided to leave them alone for a while (she also needed a bit of fresh air now that Christen wasn't alone). She took her jacket from the back of the chair and put it on saying "I'm going to have a coffee. Are you guys caffeine addicts like your sister or...?" 

The three girls laughed, which made her feel a little better and the older one replied "We are but we already had coffee on the way here so.."

"And you didn't even think about bringing me some?" Christen asked.

Tobin just smiled and gave a small nod, silently asking Christen if she was okay with her leaving for a few minutes at which Christen responded with a smile of her own and a nod.

After Tobin walked out Channing spoke "She's really sweet, Chrissy."

Christen just smiled and nodded, immediately trying to change subject "So, how was work?"

"Good. She’s as smitten as you are.” Tyler commented without missing a beat.

Christen just sighed “Please Ty. Don’t.”

“Don’t what?? I’m just saying. She looks pretty smitten. That’s a good thing y—”

“Okay, okay. Enough. Please don’t give her an hard time. She was nervous about meeting you.”

“Awww. Don’t worry. We’ll be good, right Ty?” Her younger sister asked with a pointed look.

“You guys are no fun. Yes, I’ll be good.”

After talking for a few minutes about the surgery and recovery, they saw Tobin walk in with two cups of coffee. “Here. I spoke to the doctors and they said that you’re allowed to have coffee.” She said, handing the cup to her.

“Thanks.” Christen said with a smile recieving a wink back in response.

“I can go if you guys want to cat—” 

Tobin was interrupted by Tyler. “No way! You should totally stay. We want to know more about you.”

Christen and Channing rolled their eyes at the same time. Tobin just laughed and nodded before taking a chair frpm the end of the room and sit on Christen’s left, so she was facing the two women on the other side. 

“So Tobin, Christen told us that you work together. I must admit, I wasn’t really happy that my sister’s first girlfriend in ages is a coworker, since all she can think about is work but w—”

“Ty…” Channing said, causing Tyler to shrug and Tobin to laugh before replying

“Yeah, she wasn’t a big fan of that idea either. She almost fired me once.”

“I didn’t! I was j—” Christen tried to explain between her sisters laugh and Tobin smirk.

From that on, conversations and laughters went on. Christen’s sisters learned a little bit more about Tobin and Tobin learned a little bit more about Christen’s embarassing moments as a kid. Apparantly, Tyler and Tobin were more similar than previously expected. Tobin offered to bring some food and have dinner together before they had to leave, the thought of leaving Christen alone for the night already terrifying her. After eating and saying goodbye with a hug to Christen and Tobin both, the sisters left, giving them a few moments alone.

“If you need anything you call me, okay? Anything Chris.” She said after sitting by her side on the bed.

“Okay, I will. Don’t worry babe.” 

Tobin kissed her forehead, her nose, her cheeks (paying extra attention to the left one) and finally her lips. “I don’t like the idea of leaving you here by yourself. Why can’t I stay?” she sighed.

“Because security would kick you out.” Christen said with a smile. “I’ll survive, Tobs. It’s getting late, you should go.”

“I know you'll survive. It’s me I’m worrying about here.” She laughed and kissed her one last time before standing up and putting her jacket on. “I’ll be here tomorrow morning as soon as they’ll let me in, okay?”

Christen rolled her eyes. “There is no need to. I don’t want you to spend the entire day here wh—”

“Stop. I’ll be here so I can see this pretty face of yours again.”

As soon as Tobin arrived home, she took a slow and relaxing shower before lying in bed. The events of the day replaying in her mind, remembering how more lightly she fell asleep the night before. While watching Christen being so strong and amazing even after the horrible thing she experienced, she couldn’t help but being proud of her girl. The fear about the next day surgery was stressing her out but the relieve of being nothing too serious immediately made her feel better. She wanted to call her, just to hear her voice once again before going to sleep but she knew that Christen was probably already out so she just sent a text, to let her know that she was thinking about her and that she was by her side, always. She turned around and left her phone on the floor. Charging it this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> I just wanted to quickly let you guys know how much I appreciate your love for this story. Every time you leave comments or kudos or messages, it means the world to me and I'm so so so thankful! With that being said, I know it's been a while since I replied to your comments but I read every single one of them so THANK YOU all so much for reading and taking the time to leave a comment! It motivates me to do better.  
> What do you think about this chapter? I'm not sure...  
> Anyway, I hope you have a nice day, guys. Stay happy! Bye!


	14. I’m pretty sure you can find the answer in her eyes.

The next day was horribly slow for Tobin. She woke up, took a long shower, didn't even bother to have breakfast and drove to the hospital. She brought her laptop, maybe hoping to get some work done and forget what was happening in the other room. She knew she had no real reason to be this nervous about a bone fracture repair surgery but the idea of Christen in that room made her anxious. She just wanted this day to be over.

"Good morning babe. How did you sleep?" Tobin said with a small smile while walking in.

"Not bad. You look tired, did you sleep at all?"

"Yeah, kind of." She kissed her and sat down on Christen's right bringing an arm around the girl's shoulder and giving her space to relax into her.

They spent the next minutes talking and being close. Tobin would occasionally kiss her girlfriend's head and Christen couldn't help but smile at Tobin's sweet and caring actions. She could sense the woman's nervousness and it made her feel safe and warm inside. They didn't let go of each other until the doctor walked in and annunced that they were 10 minutes away from entering the operation's room. Tobin stood up and took her hand, holding her surely before bending down and kissing her soflty again, just letting their lips linger together and trying to radiate comfort and positivity to her woman.

"I'll wait for you here, okay? I'll be here when you wake up." Tobin whispered on her lips.

Christen opened her eyes and shook her head. "Tobs, the doctor said it'll take three hours. There's no need and I'm sure I'll be out for a while after so--"

"I know but I wanna stay anyway. I have my laptop so maybe I'll just work." She said while taking her jacket, ready to leave the room.

Christen bit her lip trying to stop her laugh at seeing Tobin trying so hard to look confident and collected. "Okay." She whispered smiling. 

Turns out, Tobin was totally right: It felt like a torture. After only one hour of waiting outside that room, she was already going crazy. She tried to work but she couldn't focus and after writing the same sentence for the fifth time with another mistake, she gave up. She called Kelley and Alex and while the first one just made fun of Tobin for acting like a 'love sick puppy', Alex actually tried to calm her down by talking about whatever came up. After ending the call she stood up, walked to her car to leave her laptop there so she could go to the closest bar and have coffee. Then she called her sisters and then her brother and then opened youtube and searched for 'broken bones surgery' and proceeded to watch three entire videos before panicking even more and stopping. After waiting for a bit more, it was finally over and she felt like she could breathe again. When the doctors let her in, Christen was still asleep. Her arm was still covered with bandages and it didn't look so different than before. She decided to lie down by her side just so she could be close to her and she eventually fell asleep too.

The first thing that Christen noticed when she opened her eyes, was Tobin sleeping in what must be the most uncomfortable position ever, pressed in a little space to her right and holding Christen's hand. She smiled at how peaceful she looked before kissing her forehead. If someone would have told Christen that Tobin, the confident and chill menager could look this worried and scared by an arm surgery that made her literally lose sleep, she'd never believed them. And still, here she was, with her eyes closed, letting herself relax for the first time since she walked in that hospital. As time went by, Christen was always more and more confident that Tobin was meant to be in her life and that her beautiful being was letting Christen see a new side of happiness that she didn't know she was missing. After kissing her forehead for the second time, Tobin opened her eyes and she immediately smile.

"Hi pretty girl."

"Hi." Christen whispered back with a smile.

"How do you feel?"

"It doesn't hurt that much. How are you feeling?"

Tobin laughed and shook her head. "I didn't have surgery, Chris."

"Yeah, but it looked like you were the one having it, this morning."

Before Tobin could reply to the teasing, the door opened and Ali walked in, followed by her girlfriend.

"Oh you're awake!" Ali said, getting close to the bedroom to give Christen a hug after Tobin stood up and moved out of the way.

"I am."

"How are you, sweetheart?"

"Good actually. I'm just so tired."

"Are you spending the night here?"

"I don't know. I didn't ask yet." Christen replied with a shrug, while accepting Ash's hug.

"I did. You have to stay tonight but if it doesn't hurt, tomorrow the doctor will check on you and eventually let you go home." Tobin spoke.

"Thanks nurse Heath." Ash said playfully hearing the girls laugh.

"Shut up, dude." 

After spending as much time as possible together, Christen's arm started bothering her. The doctors said the pain probably came from the fresh scars and gave her some painkillers to let her rest. Seeing Christen fell asleep, the three women left, feeling more relieved now that the surgery was over.  
The next day, the doctors released Christen and Tobin picked her up and drove her home. 

"Do you need help?"

"Tobin, I don't need my left arm to sit on the couch." Christen said laughing.

"I know." Tobin sat by her side and sighed. "What do you want to do now?"

"Work?"

Tobin rolled her eyes at that answer. "You're not working, Christen."

"Why not? I need to at least check my emails. Do you have my laptop?"

"No. It's in your office still."

Christen sighed and shook her head "I should go get it."

"No way."

"Tobin, I--"

"What about this: We just chill today and then tomorrow morning I'll bring it to you?"

Christen looked up at her and didn't have anything to fight with "Okay. But I swear if you don't actually t--"

"I will!" Tobin said laughing and pulling her closer so they could hug.

After eating something, they watched a movie. Well, Tobin watched a movie, Christen just fell asleep on her shoulder, probably still exhausted from the events of the last few days. The older woman just smiled to herself and held her close, happy to finally have her girl home. The day just went on like this, relaxing and ejoying each other's company like they always did. While they were waiting for the pizza that Tobin ordered for dinner, Christen phone rang with a new text from Ali and when she opened it, she couldn't help but smile: It was a picture from the day before in hospital, with Tobin and Christen sleeping in the hospital bed, really close and facing each other with their fingers lightly interwined between them. When she showed it to Tobin, the woman just blushed and shrugged. "We look good together." She said, trying to sound smug and earning a kiss on the cheek from Christen. "We do."

The arm needed from six to eight weeks to fully recover. Christen tried to work with one arm as much as possible, spending hours at her laptop, getting frustrated over every single little thing that would take her so much longer than before the accident. Tobin started spending more and more time with her during those weeks, helping her as much as possible, just enjoying their relationship a little bit more now that Christen wasn't going to work. Tobin loved the feeling of getting off work at the end of the day and drive to Christen's, spending time with the woman she was falling in love with, helping her with work, with cleaning or just making her laugh when she got annoyed about her arm. Christen was so stubborn that one day she actually got in the car, convincing herself that she was totally fine to drive to work. Tobin had to phisically stop her before she could close the car door and agreed to take her that morning if she really wanted to go. Christen just smiled and nodded, happy to finally feel like a human being again. She was warmly hugged by every coworker that was relieved to have her back but that kept knocking on the door to check that she was okay. It made her feel appreciated and even more grateful for her job and team. Since that day she kept she wanted to go everyday which created a little discussion with Tobin that kept remainding her the doctor's orders and that she was still in recovery time and didn't need to go in the office to work. Christen just repeated that she was the CEO and she needed and wanted to show up at her company. She wouldn't listen to anyone, and one night after all her friends came to have dinner together and even Ali failed to convince her, Tobin couldn't do anything but nod and try to limit her work days at three a week. The rest of the days, Tobin kept insisting on doing some of her work, typing while Christen dictated the words, correcting entire stacks of documents with her, organizing plans and meetings. Christen couldn’t help but smile at how caring Tobin was and always made sure to thank her and show her just how grateful she was for her, even if she didn’t want Tobin to help and take the burden of her work too. 

“Hey Tobs!”

“Ali!” Tobin said, getting close to the woman and hugging her. 

“Are you coming with us tonight?” Ali asked, slightly surprised since Tobin had spent the last Fridays with Christen.

“Oh, no. I need to take a book from Christen’s office.”

“Oh, I see. She still works like crazy, doesn’t she?” 

“Yes. I’m helping her in every way I can and is so tiring and I had no idea of how many things she need to take care of. She does so much work!”

Ali just laughed and shook her head. “I know. She’s insane.”

Tobin nodded and smiled shyly at how true that statment was in several ways. All of a sudden she became serious and swallowed slowly before asking “Do you think I’m enough for her?”

“What?” Ali asked almost laughing.

“I don’t know, I guess I’m realizing how strong my feelings are and I was wondering if you thought that I could make her happy.” Tobin laughed at how that high school that sounded. “Sorry, forget it. I’m going crazy.” She said, hugging the woman again and kissine her temple. “Have fun tonight.” She winked.

Ali smiled at how sweet Tobin was and could easily tell that she was scared about her feelings and if they were reciprocated. “I will!” Before they could part ways she added. “And by the way, you are.”

Tobin stopped with her hand on Christen’s office door handle and looked back at her with furrowed eyebrows.  
“Enough. I haven’t see her that happy in years, Tobin. I’m pretty sure you can find the answer in her eyes. You mean so much to her.”

Tobin smiled widely at that and nodded. “Good because she means the world to me.”

Ali just laughed and walked away. “Bye sweetie.”

When Tobin arrieved at Christen’s that night, she found her girlfriend cooking and couldn’t help but smile.

“Hi babe.”

“Hi!” Christen said excited to finally kiss Tobin. “How was work?”

“Good. I missed you though.”

“Yeah, yeah, sure.” Christen rolled her eyes and kissed her again. “It’s almost ready.”

“You didn’t have to cook, Chris. I was g—”

“I wanted to.” She hugged her waist and relaxed in Tobin’s arms. “I like cooking for you.”

Tobin smiled and kept her close. “I like when you cook for me but I don’t want you to get tired and your arm c—”

“My arm is fine Tobs.” She smiled at her.

“Okay.” Tobin whispered before giving her a peck. “Do you need any help?”

“Nope.”

They ate and watched a movie in the living room. Tobin just ended up falling asleep on Christen, with her arms around her waist and a leg between hers. Christen just smiled and kissed her forehead while stroking her hair. This woman was doing so much for her. She couldn’t remember a time she felt that loved and cared for. Loved…What a big word. Was it that crazy tho? Thinking about loving Tobin? Thinking about being loved by her? Christen didn’t feel like it was. Everything about being with Tobin was natural and easy, never forced or inadequate. Yes, they were still learning each other but Christen would do anything to make her happy and she hoped Tobin would let her, as long as possible.

She fell asleep with those thoughts that kept coming up for the following days until Monday night, when she was working on Tobin’s laptop and a new email appeared on the screen, breaking Christen’s hope for those feelings to be mutual and filling her lungs with nothing but betrayal.


	15. I didn't belong to anywhere and no one.

Christen swallowed and closed the laptop, she read enough.

"Hey babe, are you done or...Are you okay? Does your arm--" Tobin couldn't finish that sentence.

"You signed with a company in Florida?"

Tobin turned pale in less than a second. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Chris, I can explain."

"They sent you tickets. You're flying next week." She said with a cold voice, the one she used when she was talking with someone she didn't like or agreed with.

"I wanted to tell you, I really did but--"

Christen interrupted her once again "And then I thought 'this has to be a mistake, she's even going back home next week'. And that's when I realize that this was exactly the point." She stood up and finally looked at Tobin's eyes, with a gaze that screamed disappointment and regret, which made the older woman break inside "So what was your plan? Just... pack your stuff and leave?"

"Christen listen to me. The company- I signed a long time ago okay? But then I told them that I couldn't move anymore and we had a conference and- I know I should have told you, okay? But then-- I didn't know how to... I'm..." She covered her face with both of her hands, cursing herself for how horrible that sounded and how pathetic it was that she couldn't even create a proper explanation and she knew why. Because there wasn't any. 

After a long silence, Christen was still looking away. "Do you know what really sucks? You lied to me."

Tobin couldn't do anything but let the first tears fall. "I'm sorry, I didn't know how to tell you that I fucked up."

Christen got closer to her until she was standing right in front of her "We have been togheter for months. It was all a game to you, was it? God, I was so stupid." She shook her head and scoffed. "I met you and I threw away all my fucking rules. I met you and all of a sudden I didn't give a fuck about all the reasons I shouldn't be in a relationship and--"

"Please s-stop. I'm not moving. I-I'm not leaving you, Chris." Tobin said while wiping away her tears.

"It doesn't matter! I trusted you. I let myself completely trust you and for what? All this months you were here, you didn't once thought about telling me?"

"I did! I wanted to, I was just trying to find a way to not work for them 'cause I don't want to, Chris ple--" Tobin took her arm and Christen immediately pulled it away.

“This was a mistake. This relationship, you being a coworker…This was all a mistake and—”

Tobin could feel her muscles tense and voice break at that statment. “W-What?”

"You lied!" She screamed. "You lied in my face! You told me you were going to your family and I just found a fucking contract and a flight ticket for you to work in another company a--"

"I know!" She screamed back. "I fucked up, okay? I-I don't know how to stay in one place so when they contacted me I-but-- that was before you, before us... But then they called and--" 

"What did you wanted to do, anyway? Just be like 'bye Chris, thanks for the good time?'? I don't even deserve an explanation?" Christen wiped away the first angry tear that fell from her eyes and turned around, putting some distance between them. "God...Here I was, thinking that we had something real going on. You staying here all this months, taking care of me after the accident... You were only here because you felt guilty. Because you were leaving in less than a fucking week--"

"No! Fuck no. You don't get to say that to me." Tobin got closer to her and grabbed her foreharm to spun her around. "I was here because I wanted to! Don't you dare say that I was here because I felt guilty or that this isn't serious for me. You have no idea how much you mean to me, Chris--"

"Yeah, I mean so much that you had to lie, huh? Hours and hours talking and you couldn't tell me a 'hey, I don't want to be with you, I'm moving to other side of the c--'"

"I want to be with you!" Tobin screamed and sobbed in her hands. "You m-make me so fucking happy an-and I..." She sighed, frustrated with herself. Christen saw how heartbroken the girl was, crying and shaking. She looked away and took her jacket, hearing Tobin speak again. "W-where are you going, Chris? Please let--"

"I need to go. I need to cool off. We'll talk but now I need to go because I'm going craz--" She said calmly.

"I'll go." She took her wrist, stopping her from leaving. "Your arm is still--"

"My arm healed Tob--" 

"Well, the last time you drove I found you in a fucking hospital's bed!" Tobin screamed. She was tired, exasperated, angry and so so sad. She took a deep breath. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scream at you." She looked up at her, feeling like a little kid in front of her mom. She took her jacket and left her laptop, maybe thinking that it could be a good excuse to come back if Christen never wanted to see her again. She didn't look up anymore, instead walked to the door and leaving the house.

They spent the following days apart. Christen wasn't ready to talk to Tobin. She kept thinking that maybe letting herself fall in love with Tobin was one of the meanest thing she could do to herself, that maybe all her rules about not dating and not having relationships with coworkers were the way to prevent her heart from breaking and that she deserved it now, that maybe all the happiness and joy she felt with Tobin and only Tobin, was never real. There was pieces of Tobin everywhere, she was losing sleep over it, she was losing hope and strength but she couldn't bring herself from regretting even a one moment with Tobin. And that made her even more angry at herself.

Tobin was in constant pain. She was heartbroken, ashamed and more than everything, missing Christen like crazy. There wasn't a day that she didn't thinka about her favorite green eyes and beautiful smile. The most caring and beautiful woman that she often thought she didn't deserve and well, here was the proof. She didn't deserve her. She was miserable without her. Why did she lie to Christen? She didn't have an answer but she knew one thing: There was no way, she was going to let her go without first explaining properly what exactly happened. So Friday, the fifth day that Christen ignored her texts, she knocked on her door. 

Christen opened it and stood still in silence.

"Hi Chris." Tobin cleared her throat, trying to slow her heart and repress the desire of pulling the woman close and kiss her. "I brought some food. I thought we could talk while we eat." Christen didn't say anything, just looked at her. "I-I know I probably the last person you want to hang out with but please, please let's talk."

Christen nodded and opened the door wider to let Tobin in. They sat down on the couch and started eating in silence before Tobin spoke. "When I was younger, I desperately wanted something to keep me grounded. Before I moved to L.A. I had other companies that were interested in me and well, I had meetings with more than a couple. With the curriculum I have, I'm fortunate enough that I could choose. After the first week of working with you guys, I knew I made the right choice. I love what the company stands for, how you work, the amazing team and enviroment. I also had the wine pub and I was content." She swallowed and smiled looking down at the food in her hands. "When I started thinking about you more often than I would like to admit, I knew that you were different. I always moved around and like I said to you a lot of times, when I was younger I used to hate getting attached and would run away from everything that could hurt me or give me an happiness just for the fear of losing it later. Now, as an adult, I don't do that anymore and I knew I was gonna fight for you because what we had was special. It always was. The company from Florida contacted me and offered me a job. Again. They offered me a lot of money and you were ignoring me and I thought that it was just a meeting. So I agreed and the meeting went well but I could still refuse the job. Then later, I signed. I don't know why, maybe because I was...Happy. And I guess, a part of me, a very big part of me, lets my fear of not fighting hard enough take over me. So I signed. Thinking that it could be a way for me to get…less dependent on you. I follow my instinct and often make wrong choices without thinking it trough. The truth? I found a lot of happiness, Chris. The amazing company and pub and friends? They make me so happy that L.A. became easily special to me and even if you weren’t in the picture, I’d still stay here. But I know, deep down, that I could live without those things, if I really wanted to. I didn’t belong to anywhere and no one. Until now. Until you.”

Christen didn’t know what to say so she just met her gaze and nodded. She understood in a way. Tobin already talked to her about her past and personality so she knew what she meant. She gently ley the take out box on the coffee table before doing the sam with Tobin’s box so she could taker her hands in hers. “Tobin I need you to know that our fight had nothing to do with the contract itself. I got mad because I thought we had such a good communication and finding out that you didn’t tell me something that important and you lied to me about it, made me feel…betrayed, in a way. With that being said, if you think that the company in Florida can make you happier, I’d never stop you, okay? If you think that professionally, that is the right choice then I’ll never limit you in any way. Feel free to go an—”

Tobin stood up and shook her head. “No Chris. You’re not listening to me.”

“I am! I understand, I just wanted to make clear that I could never stop you from doing what you want.”

Tobin nodded and sat down again. “Chris, you mean a lot to me? Everything I do for you is because I want to. Nothing more, okay? It really hurted me when you said that I only took care of you because I felt guilty… I can swear to you that I—”

“I know, I’m sorry about that Tobs.” Christen took a deep breath. “The fight, the screaming and interrupting each other, that was all too much. I think it just happened at the worst time. We have been dating for a while now and the last two months, we spent so much time together and you being here and working so hard for the company when I couldn't, it felt so…wrong to find that out. Just when I thought we were doing good, you were actually hiding something and I know you didn’t mean to… but you did. Now, you need to tell me what’s happening with that company.”

So Tobin did. She explained that she couldn’t leave the company without working for a while and that she was flying to Florida to talk with the CEOs and understand a way to work from home for them until she could leave. She said that she wanted to tell Christen as soon as possible but after the accident, she decided to tell her when she came back so she could already have a solution to her mistake. She explained that leaving L.A. wasn’t even an option in her head and that she started considering to work in Florida too before they even kissed, just to try and put some space between them so she couldn’t feel so attached to the desire of dating her. She admitted that she wasn’t gonna give up on her ever because she wanted to be with her and she couldn’t stop thinking about it, no matter how many times Christen pushed her away.

“Tobin I love working with you. I know it took me a while to accept to have feelings for you and that I was worried about us being coworkers, but I love it now. We just…get each other on so many levels.”

Tobin nodded “We do.” She looked up at her. “Do you really mean what you said? About us being a mistake?” She had to swallow at the idea of Christen saying yes.

“No. I didn’t mean that at all. I was angry and felt betrayed.” Christen took her face in her hands and kissed her slowly. 

“I’m sorry. You don’t know how sorry I am. But I was gonna tell you as soon as I—”

“I know, baby. I’m sorry too.”

“I’m really happy with you, Chris. I don’t want to ruin our perfect communication and relationship. I’m learning about being less impulsive but I’m not giving up on us. What we have… It takes my breath away sometimes but I’ll try my best to get better.”

“I’ll try my best too.” She kissed her again with a smile. “Look at us, fighting and solving the problem like an adult couple.”

Tobin laughed “I know! We’re getting old.”

“Hey, speak for yourself.”

Tobin just laughed harder and kissed her again. They missed each other too much to let go and even if they stayed away just for four days, that was a long time when you were that in love. So when they woke up the next day, the sun shining through the curtains of Christen’s room, Tobin drawing soft patterns on her naked shoulder, they decided to have a quick shower and have breakfast at their favorite little place. While she set there, under the sun, watching Tobin eat pancakes while looking back at her with the biggest smile and sying how she only needed Christen and pancakes to be happy, Christen couldn’t help but laugh and kiss her cheek before whispering in her ear. “I love you so much.”

Tobin eyes went wide, making Christen laugh again before the biggest smile she ever saw broke on Tobin’s face. The older woman pressed her lips on hers before whispering with a trembling voice “I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> A part of me hates endind chapters like I did with the 14th, just because I feel like readers don't appreciate enough how positive the chapter is when it ends with a sentence like that. Another part of me loves endind chapters with suspance because you guys get very passionate about it and it makes me smile lol.  
> Fighting is important in a relationship. You can learn and understand and when you go through it be even more sure about your feelings and your partner's, right?  
> I hope it was worth the wait!  
> I love you, stay safe! Bye!


	16. I often take it for granted.

Tobin wakes up in her hotel's room in Florida with a text from Ali: 'How dare you leave your girl like that!' with a selfie she took the night before with Ashlyn kissing her cheek, Sue with an arm around Megan and Christen in the middle of the two couples with a fake annoyed face. Tobin couldn't help but smile ad the picture and send a 'I miss my girl so much! You guys look good af btw', before putting her phone away to get ready. Today she had to visit the company for the first time and try her best to solve the mess she made. She felt so uncomfortable while watching herself in the mirror and button up her white shirt, knowing that usually that action would be followed by driving to her company in L.A. with a big smile and seeing Ali, Allie, Christen and the others from the team she absolutely loved. She sighed and shook her head, still disappointed in herself for signing for a company she didn't want to work for.

"Good morning! You must be Tobin Heath!" The woman said smiling.

"I am." Tobin replied with a kind smile before following the woman to the office around the corner.

"Go in, Mrs. Ellis is waiting for you." 

"Thank you." Tobin said while wlaking in, seeing the smile on the woman that was sitting behind her desk.

"Good morning Ms Heath and welcome to the company!

"Thank you very much." She replied with a fake smile shaking her hand.

When they set down they started talking about business and shedules and even if Tobin made it pretty clear that she couldn't move and she wanted to leave the company, the woman in front of her acted like she didn't know. After Tobin repeated the concept with a cold tone, finally the Jill stopped and smiled at her.

"Well I'm sorry Tobin. I understand that you don't want to work here right now but you signed the contract and you can't refuse to work just because you didn't calculate your times right."

"I know that but I also know that in the contract there was a specific line on flexibility of time that exaplained how it was totally the employee's choice to work from home or in the office offered in this building and I'm chosing to work from home."

"I know what the contract says. However, I'm sure you're aware of the obligation of still showing up for conferences and meetings here, Ms Heath."

Tobin swallowed. That was the part she was more scared about but she wasn't going to show it to the woman, so she kept speaking without breaking eye contact. "Yes I'm aware, but since I do live in L.A., I thought we could agree that showing up to all of them is quite impossible for me. I'll tr--"

"Maybe I haven't been clear enough." The comapany's owner said, joining her hands together on the desk and resting her arms there so she could be closer to Tobin's face "It's not about chosing when or when you're avaible but the fact that you have to be. I don't know how things work in the company you're currently working in but here, we do things with equity. It is your duty to show up just like everybody else. This" She pointed to the dismissal letter that Tobin presented "Isn't gonna change that you can't leave this company without a two months notice which was in the contract you signed. Maybe in L.A. things aren't taken seriously like they are here but w--"

"I can assure you that things are taken seriously there too, Mrs. Ellis." Tobin said with an angry tone. "I'm aware of my obligations for the next two months as long as you're aware of my situation and following limits. I'll do my best for this company while I work here, just like everyone else." After the words left her mouth, she stood up and extended her hand with a fake smile on. "It's been a pleasure meeting you in person Mrs. Ellis."

"My pleasure Heath. I guess I'll see you soon. Have a safe flight tomorrow."

And Tobin wanted to punch that smirk away but she couldn't so she shook her hand and walked out, whispering a 'asshole' to herself.

Christen was waiting for Tobin ouside the airport. She knew that they only spent two days and an half apart but that didn't stop her from missing the woman like crazy, even more now that they admitted their feelings for each other. When Tobin's eyes landed on her, the woman's wide smile appeared while she got closer to Christen.

"You don't know how much I missed you." Tobin whispered in her dark curls while she hugged her tight.

"I missed you too baby." Christen said before grabbing her face with both hands to kiss her quickly. "Let's go."

As soon as they were in the car, Christen couldn't even put her seatbelt on before Tobin was kissing her again, more passionate this time. "Hi love." She said when they pulled away.

"Hi, idiot." The younger woman giggled.

During the car ride, they talked a bit about work but Tobin was too tired from the flight and still annoyed with the conversation with Jill to talk about it, so they agreed to talk about it more the day after. When they arrived to Tobin's house, the woman didn't got out, instead looked at Christen and squeezed her hand.

"Would you please stay tonight?"

"Tobs, I'd love too but I don't have my clothes and I--"

"Please? You can take mines. I'm so tired and I need to sleep close to you."

Christen saw her glossy almost-closed eyes and nodded, watching the smile that she loved appear on Tobin's face and matching it. After they both got ready for bed, Christen turned the lights off before joining Tobin in bed. 

"Hi."

"Hi. You look pretty with my clothes on." Tobin commented, hugging Christen's shoulder and bringing her closer to her side.

"Thanks. I might stole them." She replied with a smile, resting one leg between Tobin's and lightly caressing her collarbones with her fingers.

Tobin just hummed at the contact and kissed her head. "Chris?" She called with a sleepy voice.

"Yeah?"

"You're an amazing CEO."

Christen couldn't help but laugh. "Thank you. What made you think about it now?"

"I often take it for granted. We all do. But when you look around, often CEOs don't really care about their coworkers. But you're different. You care about everyone."

"Of course I do. I respect and appreciate every person I work with."

"I know." Tobin smiled and kissed her head, mumbling a tired "I love you" before falling asleep, happy to finally have her girl back in her arms.

Christen woke up basically laying on her girlfriend that still had her arms around her. She couldn't help but smile at Tobin's peaceful face when she was sleeping that made her look so much younger. She gently kissed her lips before leaving the bed and walk out of the room to take a showeder and make coffee.   
Before she could finish the drink, strong arms hugged her from behind.

"Mornin'" Tobin whispered.

"Hi baby." Christen turned around and laughed at Tobin's eyes that were still partially closed. "Did you sleep well?"

Tobin nodded before taking the woman's cup and putting it on the counter so she could take her hand and drag her to the couch, making Christen laugh again.

"Wait, let me take my laptop."

Tobin just groaned and shook her head, not stopping her way to the couch until she could lay down, pulling Christen with her. Christen smiled again and started leaving soft kisses on her cheeks until Tobin smiled widely and opened her eyes, a little bit more awake now. She hugged Christen's waist so they were pressed together and kissed her, just enoying the feeling of her girlfriend's lips on hers. "Why are we awake so early?"

"I always get up around this time. I need to get ready for work."

"No!" Tobin said with a child like voice.

"Yes."

"I won't let you."

Christen just laughed again. "What if I make you coffee while you take a shower?"

"Take it with me?" Tobin asked with a hopeful tone.

"I already did. Sorry honey."

"Oh come on!" 

Christen laughed throwing her head back and making Tobin naturally smile.

Tobin sighed dramatically and stood up "Fine. You're lucky you're the most beautiful woman I have ever met."

"The most beautiful, huh?" Christen smirked.

"Yes. You're very annoying and stubborn too but your hotness makes up for it." Tobin shrugged with a smile before running away to avoid Christen's slap and start to get ready.

"Are you sure you're okay to drive?" Tobin asked when they were outside of her house, ready to drive separately to work.

"Of course! I picked you up from the airport last night."

"I know but I mean, I could--"

"Tobs, it's been almost two months and my arm is completely recovered."

Tobin nodded and kissed her quickly. "I'll see you after work, beautiful. Do you want to have dinner at mine? So I can explain to you everything about Florida and stuff."

"Sounds perfect baby." Christen nodded.

The day just went on like a regular one. Christen was very grateful for Tobin's work for the last two months, because she luckly didn't have that much work to recover from. Tobin smiled the whole day, happy that things were back to normal. Maybe it sounded stupid but just knowing that Christen was back in her office totally healed, helped her work better. That night they talked about Tobin's work situation and Jill Ellis behave during their conversation.

"So I just have to work two times harder for two months which I'm pretty sure she'll make a living hell for me."

"That's so stupid. She didn't even care about you living in L.A. What's the point of giving you an hard time?" Christen shook her head in disbelief.

"I have no idea. It's clear that she hates that someone would refuse a job in her company since it's very famous in Florida."

"Yeah I think so too. Anyway, I'll help you when you need me to."

Tobin just laughed "No way baby. That's on me. Besides, I can take it."

"I know you can but you helped me when I needed it. You literally worked as both a menager and CEO just because I wasn't feeling good. And even if you didn’t, I’d still do that for you."

"You don't have to--"

"I want to babe." Christen smiled at her and kissed her cheek "We're lucky enough to work in the same field. I know this months are gonna be hard for you and I'll be here every step of the way if you’ll need me, okay?"

Tobin smiled and nodded with loving eyes. "You're so such a good person, Chris. Someone else would have been mad at me for signing with another company without a--"

"I'm not someone else and I'm not mad about it, Tobs."

Tobin stood up and offered her hand to Chris. Christen took it and looked back at her with a confused face. Tobin kissed her hand before dropping it and gently taking the woman's face in her hands to kiss her lips for a long time. "I love you Christen."

The younger woman smiled at both Tobin's sweetness and the excitement she felt in her stomach after the kiss. "I love you too."

"Good because I want to show you how grateful I am for you so I'm hoping you'll let me." She said with a smile before picking her up in her arms and start walking toward her room, feeling Christen immediatly trap her legs around her waist and kiss her neck while laughing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> I'm not really happy with how this chapter turned out but I needed it to let the story evolve and I hope you guys liked it!  
> Thank you so much for reading!


	17. The idea isn't so crazy anymore.

"You actually said that?" Christen asked while laughing. It was past 11 am and she was facetiming with Tobin that was currently lying on a very uncomfortable hotel bed in Florida. She had to stay an entire week and she knew that without Christen's support she'd probably be miserable right now. This is the thing about being in love. Everything was better when she knew that she was lucky enough to call the most amazing, kind, beautiful woman she had ever met, hers. Sometimes she'd stop to think about it all. Not only she was in love with her, but somehow, for some unexplainable reason, Christen loved her back.

"Yes I did! What was I supposed to say Chris? He was so smug about it and I just pointed out how that would have been an amazing move to make the company lose money! Why are you laughing?!" She said teasingly, with a smile of her own on her face.

"I just- I can imagine your unimpressed face while saying that in front of the entire team and I-" Christen started laughing again before she could finish the sentence.

"Yeah yeah, whatever. You know how good of a manager I am." Tobin winked.

"Ehm... You're okay I guess."

"What? I'm perfect Press! I'm so good I managed to win over your cold heart!...Got it? 'Managed'"

Christen rolled her eyes at the stupid joke and shook her head with a soft smile. "It's so weird if I think about it... Like, if someone had told me that I'd start a relationship back then, I'd never ever believe them. And now, we've been dating for what? Like, five months... It's just crazy to me."

"I always knew. No one can resist my charm." Tobin shrugged before laughing. 

"You're just lucky you're hot." The younger woman reponded, making her laugh harder. 

"On a serious note, I never ever thought I could have a chance with you. I mean I felt you were...different from everyone I've ever met but you were also very stuck in your ways so I just wanted to be your friend honestly and get to know you outside the work place. Which you made hard as hell, thank you for that."

Christen rolled her eyes but smiled. She missed Tobin. It was such a weird feeling to miss her not just as a lover but as the person she shared her life with. She missed not seeing her after a work day, she missed the little smiles they had when they happened to meet in the hallways, she missed Tobin serious face when she focused on her laptop. It was stupid really. It was just a week for God's sake. But it was an entire week where she knew Tobin was working with someone else. It made her appreciate how things worked out between them and maybe laugh a little at how stupid the old Christen was to think that dating Tobin had the potential to ruin her dedication for her job, since Tobin actually made everything better. But that was how in love she was with those gourgeos brown eyes, so it didn't matter.

"Baby, you should sleep." Tobin said, looking at how glossy Christen's eyes were.

"Ten minutes and I'm going to bed."

"I miss sleeping with you. Even if we don't do that a lot. I miss waking up by your side."

"I miss that too." Christen said smiling.

Tobin sighed, still annoyed with herself for making her life more complicated by signing with this company. Just like the situation wasn't stressful enough, she also hated the company and some of the coworkers even more. There was a 'you're no one to decide' energy in the room that made everything even more negative and that was the total opposite of how Christen ran the company in L.A. "I love you Chris."

"I love you too, babe. Stay strong okay? Just another month left and you don't need to worry about it anymore."

"I know I just... Hate it. Oh, today Ellis mentioned that probably next month they need me for more than a week so we can have at least three meetings."

Christen shook her head and scoffed. "Of course she did."

"I'll send you the official request through a email as soon as I know when exactly I need to fly here and for how many days"

"This sucks. You're working way too much Tobin. Having such an important role in a company is hard, but two? At the same time? I can't even imagine, babe. You look exhausted."

Tobin nodded and smiled, watching Christen's eyes almost closing. "I'll call you tomorrow, hopefully we both have time. But right now, you need to rest baby."

"YOU need to rest too, Tobs. Tomorrow you have the second meeting, right?"

"Yes. Then I'll have a conference in the evening and I'm flying the day after."

"Okay." Christen whispered with a smile.

"Okay, beautiful. Good night."

"Good night Tobs."

"Hi pretty girl" Tobin whispered in her ear from behind, making her jump and turn around with a big smile. 

Christen immediately positioned her arms on her shoulders to tightly hug her neck while Tobin held her close with strong arms around her waist. "You're here." 

"I wouldn't miss this, babe." Tobin said before pulling back slightly to kiss her girlfriend, with their arms still around each other. "Missed you." She whispered on her lips. Christen just nodded with a smile before connecting their lips again.

"Get a room!" Megan almost screamed making them laugh and separate.

"Hi!" Tobin said getting close and hugging the blonde.

"You're late Tobin."

"I was on a plane! I literally ran out of the Airport, caught a cab home for a five minutes shower because I was gross and drove past all the speed limits to be here right now."

"I'm hoping for me and not just to make out with your girlfriend in the middle of my living room." Ashlyn said.

"Dude!" Tobin turned around and almost jumped on her "Congrats!"

Ashlyn hugged her back laughing "Thank you."

They were all celebrating Ashlyn and Ali's engagement. When a few weeks earlier, the woman explained to their friends her plan of proposing to her girlfriend, they all decided to throw a simple surprise party for Ali, already knowing how much she'd love to get to celebrate with her close friends. Tobin was upset when she found out that she'd still be in Florida on that date but luckly the party was at night and she could be there with them all.

When the two separated Tobin saw Ali and gave her a big hug too. "I'm so happy for you" she whispered kissing her temple and keeping an arm around her shoulders. 

"Thank you, Tobs. I'm happy you're here." Ali replied with a big smile after kissing her cheek.

"So... Can I finally see the ring?" She requested pointing at the woman's hand.

Ali raised her left hand with the biggest smile "It's perfect!"

"Wow! It really is." Tobin said patting Ashlyn's shoulder. "It's beautiful Ash."

Ash nodded with blushed cheeks and a shy smile "Thank you."

They all set down on the couch and arm chairs around the coffee table. Christen was sitting between Tobin's legs, while lightly resting her back on the woman's front with a glass of wine in hand. Tobin had her right hand on her stomach and her left one on the arm chair, holding a glass of wine as well. Sometimes she'd watch Christen laugh and kiss her temple with a smile. After the third time that that happened, Julie met Tobin's eyes and mouthed a 'whipped' that caused Megan, Sue and Zach to laugh from their spot on the couch. Tobin laughed too and shook her head, making Christen turn around.

"What?"

"Nothing, your friends are assholes."

"Nothing new." She kissed her lips with a smile and turned around to keep listening to Ali. That didn't help at all and caused Tobin to blush even more and Julie to laugh harder. 

When they left Ashlyn's house, they decided to stay at Christen's bacause a whole week without the other was enough time apart and they both missed falling asleep together. When they were lying in bed under the covers, both on their sides facing each other, talking and laughing with low voices in the dark room, occasionally kissing whatever spot they could reach, Tobin asked in a whisper

"Do you want to get married one day?"

Christen took her time before answering "I do."

Tobin smiled, a little surprised by the answer "I didn't expect that."

"Yeah. Me neither." They both laughed softly and Christen kissed her cheek before continuing "I can't say that I always wanted it. I just, never propely thought about it, I guess? But now that I'm in a relationship in which I'm 100% comfortable in, the idea isn't so crazy anymore, you know? The thought still scares me but I guess I could see myself married. With the right person, of course."

Tobin smiled still looking in her eyes and felt her stomach contract at the idea of being the one lucky enough to call Christen her wife one day. They weren't even close to being there yet, that was more than clear to the both of them, but just dreaming about it was enough to make her heart beat faster. "Yeah, I get that."

"I already know you do too."

"Yeah, I'd love to get married. I know two people don't need marriage to be together forever but I'd love to have that title, you know? I'm committed to the relationship either way but the idea of being a wife and share those promises in front of family and friends... It's just special, I don't know." Tobin shrugged, maybe a little insecure. "Maybe I just love weddings." 

"You're something else, Heath." Christen said smiling before kissing her.

They got back at talking about TV shows and movies until they both fell asleep, exhausted by their day and ready to wake up in each other's arms the next day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for making you wait but things are very hard with Uni and stuff. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter even if it's a little bit shorter than usual! Let me know!  
> Thank you for reading, I love you all! Bye!


	18. Exactly, we don't know.

Tobin walked with confidence in that office, knowing it would be her last time doing it. She sat down with a smile and presented the documents from the day before conference. Jill looked up at her smiling and accepting the papers.

“Well, I think this is were our paths separate Miss Heath.” She said with a kind tone that surprised Tobin.

“I think so too.”

“It’s been a pleasure working with you. I wish you and the company back in L.A. you'll keep work for, the best.”

“Thank you, Mrs Ellis. It means a lot coming from you.” Tobin said with a polite smile.

The CEO nodded and signed the last paper she needed to, for making Tobin discharge official and final. She then called her segretary to make copy of the act. While they waited for her to come back, Jill looked up at her again.

“What did you thing about yesterday conference?”

Tobin actually smiled, having loved the request of a specific organization that was starting an enormous project and that was selecting the best companies in the United States to collaborate and provide a large amount of money to invest in the educational system of less fortunate countries in the world. “I loved how the S.O.L presented their program. They are truly passionate and I think it could be a great success. They also specifically requested a meeting with this company because they know that you are a powerful team here in Florida and could—”

“Oh, no. I’m not talking about that. I’m not interested in the project. What about the deal we are finalizing in New York?”

“Oh.” Tobin nodded and explained what were her thoughts and how she had put all the statistic in the documents, how the deal was very specific and careful of all the details which was, in her opinion, probably a good sign. Ellis agreed and shared her thoughts as well. When the segretary walked in and Tobin took the paper with a smile, she didn’t immediately stand up. “Why aren’t you even considering collabing with the S.O.L.? I mean, it’s a great project, it helps people and they are clearly interested in working with you.”

Jill shrugged. “We wouldn’t gain anything interesting, really. I mean, I can double the profit with any other company but they made the rates pretty clear. Not really worth it to me.”

Tobin almost scoffed. “Well, it’s for a good couse. Of course a portion of the money is going to the people that need it. That’s the all point of making a—”

“Yeah, I know. It’s great project but not one I’m interested in for my company. I’m sure it'll help a lot of people in need and I wish them the best but I have to do what makes my business grow. If the numbers don’t help me, it’s just not worth it.” She exlained in a relaxed tone that made it pretty clear that she didn’t even take the offer into consideration for more than a couple of seconds.

“Right.” Tobin shook her head with a smile and stood up. Ellis was a great business woman, no one could deny that but…God, Tobin was happy she didn’t have to work for her anymore. She extended her hand. “It’s been a pleasure working with you. I wish you and your team the best.”

“Same for you Miss Heath.”

Tobin smiled one last time and turned around to walked towards the door. Before she could exit the room, when her hand was still on the handle, the CEO spoke again.

“Miss Heath, if you really believe in that project, then present it to your team in L.A..”

Tobin froze. She didn’t even think about it, always separating her job in Florida from the one in L.A.. She looked over her shoulder and smiled at her, before walking out.

The ride in the backseat of the cab that was taking her back to the hotel, she couldn’t stop thinking about the idea to talk with Christen about it. The process wasn’t really easy. They had to request a meeting and after that wait to be accepted and then create a program that was compatible to their’s. The thing is, she knew how much Christen dreamed about using her work to help others. They had talked about it a lot, when opening up with the other about future goals and hopes.  
Christen didn't just want to run a company, she wanted to change things, fight for what's right and have a positive impact on this world. Her company wasn't as big and powerful as Jill's was, that was a fact and that fact also made it really hard to seriously ever consider to work witha no-profit organization. But she also was very young which made the idea perfectly fit the word "dream", the one you explain after saying "maybe one day". Those were all the reasons Tobin needed to be unsure about talking with Christen about it.

They saw each other the day after Tobin came back from Florida, finally for the last time. They met at Christen's after work and they were enjoying their time together like they always did: with playfulness and joy. When they layed on the couch, Christen resting her head on her girlfriend's shoulder with her eyes fixed on the TV, Tobin couldn't care less about the movie, because Christen was in her arms after almost three weeks apart. She kissed her head and kept her close, knowing that no one could ever make her feel at home like Christen. It was crazy, right? That she couldn't even imagine her life without this woman that she met less than a year ago, but it was even more crazy now to think of living without her, because Christen was beautiful and kind and passionate and hard working. She was so invested in making everyone comfortable and happy and better, day by day. Tobin had no doubt that she'd do anything to help her achieve all of her goals, because Christen deserved ev--

"Tobs what's wrong?" Christen soft voice broke her thoughts. 

"S-Sorry, what did you ask?" 

Christen looked up at her with a confused face before turning off the TV and positioning her body completely on top of Tobin, with her chin resting on her chest. "What are you thinking about, baby?" 

"That you're beautiful and I'm in love with you." Tobin smiled

Christen rolled her eyes and pushed herself forward to kiss her lips. "What are you thinking about really? I can tell that something is on your mind. What's bothering you?" 

Tobin just shook her head. "Not here. I'll tell you, I promise. Nothing is wrong." 

"What do you mean with 'not here'? We're at home Tobs, I--" 

Tobin just kissed her, passionate and sweet, before biting her bottom lip and leaving small pecks all over her girlfriend's face, listening to her giggles and admiring her beautiful smile. She suddenly stopped, keeping eye contact with a serious face, careful to confuse Christen enough so she wouldn't notice her slow movement of raising her shirt until she quickly shifted down and rolled them over so she could start kiss and tickle her girlfriend's stomach and sides. 

"Oh my God! Y-you are such a... Tobin! Stop!" Christen screamed, while trying to catch her breath between laughter and push Tobin away from her stomach. When the older woman stopped, she pushed her shirt down again and slapped her arm. "That was mean." 

"Miss Press calling me mean? The irony..." Tobin teased. 

"What is that supposed to mean?" Christen joked back, crossing her arms. 

"Oh I don't know Miss 'If I don't save the deal you're out' Press."  
Christen mouth opened in shock. She stood up from the couch and Tobin catched her wrist just in time to pull her on her lap. "I'm joooking, baby." She kissed her shoulder and kept her arms strongly around her girl. 

"No. I can't believe you brought that up." Christen said offended and trying to stand up. 

"I'm kidding, come on. Hey! Stop trying to run away from me!" 

Christen finally gave up and looked back at her girlfriend's grin. "I'm glad you're having fun, Heath." 

Tobin just hugged her even closer before leaving a kiss behind her ear. "I love you." 

"I know." Christen smiled and turned around so they were facing each other. "I don't know if I do." She pecked her lips and quickly stood up to run away from her. They were laughing like two kids when they both fell on the bed in Christen's room, breathing heavily and kissing deeply. 

The next day, Tobin knocked on Christen's door. 

"Come in." 

Tobin walked in the office and Christen looked up. "Hey, what's up?" She said, surprised to see her there when she didn't have any documents to sign or review today. 

"I... I want to talk with you about something." Tobin said before sitting down and offering her a pen drive. 

Christen took it and connected it at her laptop. As soon as she saw the screen, her eyebrows lowered in confusion. "I don't understand. What's this?" 

"A project. An amazing one." Tobin started, explaining into ditails everything she knew about it, how she knew about it and why she thought it could be a great opportunity to use they resources for something positive and impactful. Christen was surprised by it all and kind of speechless. 

"Tobin, this is amazing. It really is but I don't know if we're what they are looking for." 

"Exactly, we don't know. Maybe we are." 

"I doubt it. They requested to collab with a company like Jill's. We're not on that level of investments and experience. They have been in this field for decades, three years ago this company was nothing. " 

"I know but we're solid Chris. We can just request a meeting. If it goes well then we'll create a program and see." 

"That takes time tho." Christen looked at the screen then back at Tobin and at the screen again. It was a beautiful project. 

"It could be worth it."

"Besides, I don't know if I'm enough for this... I mean, I don--" 

"Press, you're the best CEO I have ever worked with. You treat everyone with respect and acknowledge everyone's opinion. This isn't just about money and I have a feeling that they don't want it to become just about money. With a lot of companies it could end that way. Not with this one tho. Not with you here."

"I don't know." 

The two of them never spoke about the project again but Christen thought about it a lot and after more than two week of documents, informations and statistics, she decided that it could be something worth considering but not without including her team. So Monday morning before walking in her office she spoke with Ali. 

"Al, can you please set a meeting? Tomorrow morning, 10 o' clock. I want everyone there."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> I'm sorry for disappearing and making you wait almost two months for an update but my life is a mess right now and my mental health keeps getting worse.  
> Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy reading my story and are happy to see an update!  
> Have a nice day and stay positive. 
> 
> BLACK LIVES MATTER! (Here's a link to educate yourself on what you can do to help.)
> 
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1KkR1jlZAxRtBxOLL7D3sA8K9io6m4gHNsotjpKkuFUE/mobilebasic


	19. Nothing can tear us apart if we don't let it.

"The reason you guys are here is a project that I think could be interesting for us. I found out about it through a member of this company that was somehow linked with a company in Florida that couldn't come to an agreement with that organization and refused the deal. After a lot of research and many dubts, I thought it was worth to present it to you guys because that's something I would love to work with not just as a human being, but as part of a company I know stands for something bigger than just profit. Sure, on a personal level I think this project is amazing but I'm here because I really believe that WE can make it better and I'm sure you all know that I wouldn't waste your time with something I don't believe in as both a CEO and a person..."

Tobin was sitting at the conference table with wide eyes, listening and being always mesmorized by the beautiful way Christen expressed herself. No matter how many conferences or meetings they had, Christen was an amazing leader and no one could deny that. Tobin didn't know that Christen decided to give attention to this project, they just never spoke about it again and se thought that the CEO didn't like the idea but, again, she knew Christen enough to know that nothing is an easy 'yes' or 'no' to her, everything has to be evaluate enough to be sure about the final answer.   
After half an hour of speech, everyone was staring at the big screen in silence.

Allie spoke first. "Well, that's a beautiful project." Receiving nods from the team.

Christen spoke again. "We have to put a lot of time and effort in this. We have send the request with two representatives and set a meeting. If we are what they're looking for then we have to work for a program that we have to present after six months. Everything has to be in it: what we want to do, in what area we want to help the most, statistics, economic pros and cons of every choice... Everything. And I need every single one of you for that. If they like it, everything starts. But if they don't then... Well, we lost basically six months." 

"Yeah, but we never starts something with 'if it goes wrong' do we?" Marcus responded.

Christen smiled a little "We don't." 

They talked about it a lot, all the members being positive and wanting to be part of the project. Every single person was giving their opinions and everytime something negative entered the topic, they were already figuring out how that could be solved and Christen was glad she was surrounded by those people, they were exactly what she needed: People ready to put the work and sacrifices if it meant they could get better and evolve in some type of way. 

"I think it could really be a chance to be changemakers. That's what we want to be, right?" Tobin asked to the room.

Everyone nodded with a confident yes.

"Well, let's make it happen then." Ali said, opening her agenda. "First of all, I need the two names. Christen and...?"

"Tobin." Allie said without even looking up.

Tobin head shoot up looking around at every member in the room, that was even nodding or not paying attention to Allie's word, too focus on the documents in their hands. "W-what? No way. I'm the operation manager."

"So?" Ali asked.

"It's not my place."

"It's noone's place, Tobin." Allie said.

Tobin looked at Christen that was listening to the interaction with a surprised face too but couldn't really find anything to say, so she just shrugged slightly. "Who do you guys think should be the other representative?" 

At which everyone responded with Tobin's name, like it was the most reasonable answer.

"No! I-, guys I've been part of the company for less then a year. I'm technically the last person that could do that."

"Since when does that matter? I mean, the official presentation is in more that six months. By then it'll be much more than a year you worked here, so..." Mark said before looking down at the papers in front of him again.

Tobin once again looked up at Christen that spoke "Why do you guys think that Ms. Heath is the best choice?"

Allie responded almost immediately "Well, for example when the accident happened and you were in hospital, she's the one that stepped up and closed that deal. Even if she looked like a mess and was obviously freaking out two minutes prior, she put that aside for the sake of the comapny. She showed up collected and confident, ready to answer any question they threw her way with ease and well...It worked."

Tobin went bright red at the mention of Christen's accident, remembering that she was in fact, freaking out that day. "T-That was different. That was an emergency."

"Well, now it won't be. So it'll be easier for ya, Tobs." Another coworker replied.

Christen bit her lip and tried to stop her smile by looking down. When she heard Tobin's name, she was surprised as well but it made perfectly sense. Tobin had the characteristics you want by your side when you're representing your comapany, characteristics that were very different from hers but just as important. "It looks like it's decided then." She said, nodding in Ali’s direction, to let her know it was okay to write Tobin's name in her agenda.  
Tobin turned in her direction with wide eyes but before she could say something , Ali was already standing up to organize the dates with everyone and Christen wasn't looking up at her so she just let it go.

When Christen finally got home from work, she threw an oversized shirt on, made herself some tea and took her laptop to start reading emails. That was basically what she did every week day and before meeting Tobin, even on the weekends before going out with her friends. After maybe half an hour her phone rang. 

“Hey babe.” She answered after seeing who was calling.

“Hi baby…”

“Is everything okay? You sound stressed.”

“I am.” After a long pause she sighed and asked. “I know we usually stay together after work only on Fridays but can I come over?”

“Of course you can, Tobin. Why are you asking me like it’s that big of a deal?” Christen asked laughing slightly. They both made sure to have their own space and even if they did have different roles in the company and didn’t work directly together most of the time, they didn’t want to move to fast and start already spending every night at one of their places. They always tried to balance it well but it happened on more than a few occasions to stay together the night on a week day so Christen didn’t know what the tension in Tobin’s voice was coming from.

“Thank you. Sorry, everything is fine I just need you right now. I’ll bring food okay?”

“Sure baby, see you soon.”

“Yeah.” Tobin whispered before hanging up.

Christen was a little confused by her behave and started wondering if something happened between the two of them that could have made Tobin upset. Luckly for her she didn’t have all that time to overthink before her girlfriend was knocking at the door. “Hi.” She greeted her.  
Tobin took a step forward and kissed her, slow and sweet, with her hands on her hips before hugging her waist and kissing her shoulder.

“Is everything okay? What happened?” Christe asked, moving her hands up and down Tobin’s back to show that she was there for her.

“Nothing happened! I brought food.” Tobin replied with a smile.

They set on the couch, eating and talking about irrelevant stuff before Tobin rested her head on her girlfriend’s shoulder and sighed. 

“I had a stressful day at work.”

Christen smiled and put her arm around Tobin’s shoulder from behind and kissed her temple. “You did?” She asked caressing her collarbone.

“Yes.”

“What stressed you out about today?”

“That the team said my name for the representative role.”

“You don’t want to do it?”

Tobin turned around to meet her eyes. “Do you want me to do it?”

“Of course I do. They all said your name. If that’s what the team wants then I do too.” 

“Yes but, do you? I mean we have to work together a lot.”

“So? Is that what you’re worried about? That working that close for months will tear us apart?”

The older woman bit her lip before looking back up at her girlfriend. “Nothing can tear us apart if we don’t let it so no. I guess I’m just scared… A part of me doesn’t feel enough for this role and another part of me doesn’t want to mess up the balance we created in all those months between our work and our relationship. I mean, in the first months you were still a little skeptical about the all ‘dating a coworker’ thing. I don’t want us to go back there.”

“Baby we won’t.” Christen sighed, knowing too well where Tobin’s insicurities are coming from. “Listen, if before meeting you, someone would have said to me that I’d work with my girlfriend, I would have laughed. But with you, I didn’t have that much of a choice. I know you were hurting from my behavior and how uncomfortable I was with you at work in the beginning, but now everything changed.” Christen cupped Tobin’s cheeks and kissed her with a smile. “I love working with you by my side. You thought me that it’s totally possible and even if we risk to mix work with feelings, we’ll talk about it and find a solution, okay?”

“Okay. That’s what I wanted to hear.” Tobin smiled and set straight on the couch to pull Christen on her lap sideway and kiss her.

“And you know you’re going to be great at it. You know how much I respect you and trust you, both in our work place and outside.”

“Oh, I know.” Tobin said with a teasing smile, making Christen laugh and roll her eyes. “I love you, Chris. I just need to keep talking about stuff. Last time I kept my frustration to myself I almost left the company and moved to Florida.” 

Christen laughed throwing her head back. “You actually left the company if I remember correctly.”

“Yes. But someone ripped of the evidence, so it’s fine.” She smiled at Christen’s laugh and started kissing her again and again and again.

“I love you too by the way.” The younger woman said between kisses.

“You better, ‘cause you can’t get rid of me anymore.”

“Well…I mean, I technically can you know…”

Tobin looked up at her with her mouth open. “No you can’t! We’ll stay together forever!”

Christen only laughed harder and nodded “I meant in the company. You know, since I’m the boss and evrything.” She shrugged teasingly and kissed her again.

“Okay, fine. You could get rid of me at work.” She pointed a finger at her with raised eyebrows “But not in our personal life. You’re mine, end of dicussion.”

Christen looked in her eyes biting her lip to hide her smile. “Yours, huh?” Tobin nodded with the most adorable smile and Christen couldn’t help but kiss her again. “I’m noticing that you’re a liiittle possessive.”

“I’m not.” The older woman responded giving her a peck.

“No? Like you weren’t jealous last week at the wine bar?”

Tobin groaned and looked away with an annoyed face. “He deserved that.”  
That day they were at Tobin’s wine bar and Christen was talking with the barman they had just hired and that really clearly didn’t get that that was Tobin’s girlfriend. Tobin hated it. He kept smiling and touching her forearm until she couldn’t take it anymore and got closer to them, putting a protective arm around Christen’s waist. The guy smiled at her but kept flirting with her girlfriend. Right there, in front of her. So she asked him if he didn’t have work to do around the bar and he just replied that there weren’t that many people that night, so he could cut a few minutes to talk to the most beautiful woman that ever walked in. At that point Christen covered Tobin’s hand on her waist with her own, feeling her tense but before she could say something Tobin smiled at him ad replied with a ‘Did anyone ever tell you that if you want to keep your job, you shouldn’t hit on the owner’s girlfriend?” At which the color drained from the barman’s face, that just looked at them and finally realized that they were obviously a couple. He got back to work and Christen looked up at her with raised eyebrows, but Tobin was still annoyed so she kept herself from making any jokes about it.

“He really didn’t babe.” She said and Tobin rolled her eyes pushing slightly on Christen’s waist but she didn’t move. “Oh, stop it. I know you how good it feels to use the ‘I could fire you’ card.” She winked, making Tobin finally laugh.

“Okay, I’m a little bit jealous.” Tobin admitted.

“I know but you had nothing to worry about that night. Or any night really.”

“I know that. I trust you. I just don’t like it. You’re my woman, no one is hitting on you in front of me.”

Christen nodded and kissed her again “Hot.” She whispered making them both laugh and Tobin's mood immediately lighter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo here we are! Almost done with this story actually and you'll love the next couple of chapters (hopefully lol).   
> I noticed that I don't answer comments on here since maybe chapter 3, so I'm answering all the questions/comments on this chapter so if you have anything to say/ask do it!   
> Also, Thank you to every single beautiful person that spent kind words for me in the past weeks. That means the world to me and I love that you took even just ten seconds of your time to say something nice to me, so once again, Thank you!  
> Let me know what do you think about this chapter! (I sometimes worry that I bring too much attention to their work and not enough to them as a couple so I always try to put a little bit of them being sweethearts lol.)
> 
> Love you, have a nice day! Bye!


	20. I was apparently waiting for this one.

Almost three weeks after they had the first online meeting with the S.O.L. assosiation. It was a pretty short one really, they had to just talk about the company a bit, to make sure their way of working was compatible with theirs. Tobin and Christen worked hard for it, even if the operation manager during a moment of Christen’s overworking every single detail, confidently said with a bright: “I’m so sure that they are going to approve that my mind is already focusing on the plan that we have to come up with after.” Which made Christen laugh and relax, and that was one of the amazing things of working with her girlfriend by her side. But she could read between the lines and she knew that as much as Tobin was confident and sure, she was still worried about not being enough or suited for that role and in those moments the CEO always made sure to tell her how happy and grateful she was for being able to work with her, and the smile that she wore while saying those words always made Tobin immediately ready to work ten thousands time harder.

When it was finally over, Christen and Tobin walked out of the conference room almost like they couldn't breathe properly in there anymore. As soon as they closed the door, Christen softly took both of Tobin's cheeks while she put her hands on the younger woman’s waist before kissing, still smiling for the excitement of that little victory and the happiness of sharing that little victory with each other. The kiss lasted less than two seconds, broken by cheers and whistles in the back. When they looked at their side with wide, they saw the entire team standing there, apparantly waiting for them to come out. They were smiling, laughing and some of them clapping or dancing in a silly way. Christen and Tobin both took a step back and turned around to face them completly. Tobin was looking down and scratching the back of her neck to try to hide how uncomfortable and lost she was, while Christen was bright red and swallowing hard, not really sure about what to say. The positive feeling of hearing 'yes' from the association stopped her from being totally disappointed and angry at herself for letting her do something so personal at her work place. She looked at Tobin that looked like a deer in headlights and that awkwardly shrugged as soon as she looked back at the CEO.

"So?! Was it a yes?" Allie asked with open hands and a bright smile.

"Y-Yeah, they said we can proceed with the plan." Tobin said still blushing.

At that the team cheered again, making her smile.

Christen looked like she wanted to say something but was still too embarassed to do so, and Tobin knew her enoug to know that she couldn't go back to being the boss everyone needed if she didn't sort things out first. They shared a short look, and she read her next move in those green eyes, like she always did, without needing words and spoke after clearing her throat. "W-Well, so you obviously saw that me and Christen, well we...uhm, we are, you know..." She cleared her throat for the second time and took a deep breath, changing her attitude to a professional one to gain some confidence while everyone was looking at her conused . "I think it's the right moment to announce that me and Miss Press are dating. Obviuosly our personal life never interfered on our job and never will in the future. Our relationship here is strictly and only professional like with any of you, so we y-"

"Oh God, I thought you were about to give us a horrible new about the project." Allie said with a hand on her chest and closing her eyes.

"So what did they say?" Marcus asked next.

"We do have six months from the actual presentation , right?" Ali asked opening her agenda and taking her pen to write down, looking expectantly at Christen.

"Y-Yeah. Six months." The CEO said nodding, still confused about the team reaction.

"Okay, so tomorrow we can already start with t-" Another coworker started before Tobin interrupted.

"Wait! You already knew? About us?" She asked waving her hand between her and Christen.

Everyone nodded and shrugged, no one really caring about the conversation, instead focusing on talking with each other. 

"You thought we didn't know?" Someone in the back said almost laughing.

"Do you really think we are that clueless? It's been months, Heath." Allie said rolling her eyes and walking past them to the conference room, followed by everyone else and leaving the two standing there.

"Well, that went good." Tobin said looking at Christen with a smile.

The younger woman just laughed and rolled her eyes, before turning around and walking in the conference room shaking her head.  
At the end of the day, before everyone could leave the room, Christen took a deep breath and stood up. “Guys, you already know how grateful I am to work with all of you. I want you to know that this six months aren’t gonna be necessarily easy for us. We have to keep working with the companies that are already at our side and at the same time put passion and work into this new, amazing project. I don’t want us to ever lose focus on what we’re doing or at least trying to: Getting better. Growing and evolving as workers and as people, for ourselfs and for the team, for this company and for our community. This months are going to be hard but I know we can take it. So we will, okay?”

“Okay”

“Yes.”

“Of course.”

“Absolutely yes.”

Christen heard and that was enough to remind her why she put so much trust in that team, in that group of people that in three years had grown and made Christen grow more than anyone else, as a leader, a coworker and an ambitious woman. 

“Babe, are you ready?” Tobin called from the bedroom, waiting for Christen that was still on her laptop. When she walked in the kitchen and saw her, she sighed. “Chris, come on let’s go. We’re already late.”

“I’m coming, just five minutes.” 

Tobin sighed again and shook her head, trying not to get frustrated. In a little more than a month that went by since the meeting, that wasn’t the first time that Christen worked way too long on a weekend, even jumping her night out with her friends to work a little longer. They had a fight about it, Tobin repeating that she needed a break because six months like that would ruin her mind. Christen had raised her voice telling her not to treat her like a child and that since she had the company she always worked like that and now she was just a little more worried for the project. Tobin started asking why in more than a month they didn’t even once had a date just the two of them and since when giving an advice meant treat someone like a child. That frustrated Christen even more, saying that she wouldn’t put aside her work just for a date with her girfriend, Tobin screamed back that she wasn’t asking that at all, and the night ended with Christen leaving the house and going to Ash and Ali’s to calm down for a few hours. Ali made Christen think about the fight a little deeper and about considering that spending time with Tobin working at her place, wasn’t so different than working at the office and even if they are used to work in the same room on their own thing, they always took a break to eat, watch a movie, talk or just kiss a little. Christen soon realized that she was failing at being a good girlfriend for Tobin and was just being a coworker all the time. But believe it or not, it was still hard for her. She was used to dedicate basically all of her time to her company, that having a girlfriend while working on a new goal was something new. Even if she had been with Tobin for months and months, falling into old habits was easier that she thought it would. The next day they talked about it, apologizing for losing control and discussing how even if work was crazy for both of them, they needed to take care of their private life as well. That night they fell asleep in each other’s arms after laughing at a stupid movie Tobin chose to watch.

As soon as she got closer to her girlfriend, Christen immediately closed the laptop and looked up at her with a smile. “Please, I’m almost done, I swear.”

“What were you doing?”

“Sendning a really important mail, babe.” 

“To who?”

“Oh, uhm, another company that is interested in working with the S.O.L as well.”

“Really? Which one? I mean I’m pretty sure w-“

“Don’t worry about it just… Can you take my jeans jacket in the closet so we can go?” She asked with the sweetest smile. 

Tobin rolled her eyes and gave her a peck on the lips “Yes, my love.”

Christen quickly opened the laptop again to finish her message before closing everything and standing up as Tobin walked towards her with the jacket. “Thank you.”

“Welcome.” The older woman said with a bright smile, receiving a kiss. “So what company is interesting in the project?”

“Oh, you don’t know them.”

Tobin chuckled. “Yeah but wh-“

“I thought I was the one that always thought about work.” The CEO said with a teasing voice after stopping at the end of the stairs. 

“I’m just asking and you’re being weird.” 

At that, Christen just laughed and kissed her before taking her hand and walking outside the building. 

When they arrived to Sue’s, everyone was already there. 

“Oh, here you are you two. Honored to have you with us Miss Heath. I really hope you brought some wine. If not, you can easily exit the house.” Megan said after opening the door and hugging Christen.

Sue rolled her eyes and slapped her girlfriend’s shoulder before hugging the couple as well. Tobin gave Sue the bottles of wine winking at her and making her giggle. “Sorry Megan, I didn’t have any wine left, so you have to stick to orange juice.”

Megan, that was already walking away, turned around and scoffed. “Nothing is entering my body unless it has alcohol in it so… ”

Conversations flowed easily between the group of friends, catching up about what they wanted and what was going on in their life. Ash and Ali talked about organizing the wedding and how hard it was to find a location in L. A., Megan updating them on her desire to change her job and starting new with her own business, Sue talking about missing her family in Seattle. 

“Yeah, I feel the same. It’s been almost a year since I saw my family in person. Even if we talk every day, it’s not the same. I miss the kids the most. They’re growing up so fast, it’s crazy.” Tobin said looking down at her glass and smiling sadly. 

“It’s already been a year since you moved here?” Ali asked with wide eyes. 

Tobin nodded and smirked. “Almost. Could even be our anniversary, but Miss Pres here made me wait, like, three months before giving me a chance.”

Christen rolled her eyes and shook her head while everyone else laughed. “You’re lucky you even had one, Heath.” 

“I am lucky.” Tobin replied kissing her temple and making Christen smile and kiss her. 

“Ew, stop.“ Megan said closing her eyes in a dramatic way. 

“I’m sorry? I had to witness you being gross in front of me for years.” Christen said pointing between Sue and Megan and Ashlyn and Ali. 

“It’s not our fault if you literally rejected every person you ever met that just hinted about wanting a relationship.” Megan said back making everyone laugh. 

“You know, I was apparently waiting for this one to show up at my company.“ She replied tilting her head towards Tobin that was smiling beside her. 

“And then be a bit of a bitch to her for a while.” Ali shrugged with a smile and a wink towards her best friend. 

“ALI!” Christen said while everyone laughed again.

The moment was broken by Christen's phone ringing. When she saw who was calling, she stood up to answer and walk in the other room. After 20 minutes she came back with a frustrated face, running both of her hands through her hair. 

"It was the S.O.L.. We have to start over."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So one chapter left and (hopefully) an epilogue before closing this story!  
> I know I that I uploaded very slowly and honestly, maybe I didn't let this story evolve like I would have wanted in the beginning, but maybe that's why I felt free to have fun writing it. I don't really know lol.  
> I hope you're still enjoying my writing and that you're as excited as me for the last chapter!  
> Well, let me know what did you think about this one and have a nice day! Bye!


	21. You are who I needed to love and be loved by.

This was the biggest project the company ever treated. They all knew and expected how hard those months could be. At least they thought they did. Truth being told, that phone call completely changed everything for every single member of the team. But there was one thing that Christen wouldn’t change. She had been organizing this surprise for Tobin for months now, almost getting caught by her girlfriend in more than one occasion but always being able to blame it on a mail for a company or whatever other professional duty she could think of in the moment. It was the end of May, two months after she received the call by the S.O.L. telling her that the program needed to be ready in five months and not six, making the team delete evreything they came up with until that point and start over. One entire month less than what they expected and agreed for. They had to do more, adding hours to their shifts, adding events to their days and adding stress, pessimistic thoughts and fear of not making it in their minds. Dates, meetings, plans, completely changed. Even they’re mind set changed but only became stronger, the competitiveness of the team blocking those thoughts from taking control of their focus. But this. This idea stayed the same in Christen’s head. It was now close to an entire year since Tobin saw any of her family members in person and Christen decided to do something about it, stealing Perry’s number from Tobin’s phone to contact her and ask if it was possible. Tobin’s family responded with so much joy and excitement that Christen felt proud of herself. At the end of the day, no matter how much stress and anxiety her job was bringing in her life in this tough time, she couldn’t let the opportunity to make her girlfriend happy slip away. 

“Good morning, baby.” Christen whispered with a smile, kissing the soft skin of Tobin’s shoulder below her.

“Mornin’” she replied, hugging her girfriend’s body that was laying almost completely on top of hers. “What time is it?”

“It’s still early, birthday girl.” 

Tobin smiled brightly at that and finally opened her eyes. Her gaze immediately fell on her girlfriend’s face, making her ask herself once again how she could be so lucky to call this woman hers.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Christen whispered with a smile just as wide while slowly moving a thumb on the woman’s cheek. She didn’t receive an answer so she just kissed her. “Happy birthday, baby.”

“Thank you, babe” Tobin replied before kissing her gain, longer this time.

“Are you ready for breakfast?” 

“Not yet, let’s stay in bed for a little longer, please.” 

“You’re getting so old already.” Christen rolled her eyes. “Well, too bad, I’m going in the kitchen and eat the amazing donuts I bought and you can just eat boring milk and c-“

“You bought donuts?”

“And coffee.” She nodded with a smile and a laugh as Tobin immediately stood up and walked towards the door taking her hand.

She couldn’t help but smile as soon as she reached the kitchen and saw what was on the table. She turned around and put both of her hands on her girlfriend’s hips to pull her closer “You’re really sweet, babe. You didn’t have to do all that.”

“It’s just breakfast and flowers, Tobs.”

“I know.” She gived her a peck, smile still wide on her face. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Christen replied.

After they set down and almost finished their donuts, Christen nodded towards the flowers.  
“There’s a letter there, open it.”

Tobin took the envelope and joked “Did you put some cash in it or something? Oh! Are you giving me a raise?”

Christen rolled her eyes and didn’t respond, secretely too nervous, waiting for her girlfriend’s reaction to what was inside.

The forst thing in the envelope was note and Tobin read the sweet handwritten words with a little smile on her face, taking Christen’s hand and kissing her knuckles multiple times before closing the note and take the other paper. When she read the first words, she immediately let go of her hand and stood up as if she had been shocked. “What’s this, babe?” She asked with a trembling voice before covering her mouth with her hand, eyes still fixed on the paper.

“Those are plane tickets to go home in a couple of days.” Christen said, recognizing Tobin’s emotional reaction as a happy one.

“What? Christen I-I can’t go, how can I go? I can’t do everything in two days, and in just two months we have t—”

“I’ve already planned all of it. You’re going.” She said standing up.

Tobin’s eyes finally met hers and Christen melted at seeing her so overwhelmed “Come here” she whispered with her arms open.

The older woman shyly got closer and hugged her, holding her tight in her arms, unable to create any coherent thought. She was going to see her family in person. For the first time in a year. She was flying in two days. That was absolutely crazy. She stepped back and shook her head with a small incredulous smile. 

“Tell me where this is coming from, please? I’m speechless.” She asked before looking down at the tickets in her hand again and letting a wide smile take over her face while sitting on the chair.

So Christen told her how she stole her sister’s number to ask if it was okay for them, if it was the right time at the begging of June and if Tobin would’ve been happy receiving this surprise from her. She told her how happy and excited they were and how nice they were with her, that everyone knew already except her mom that didn’t know she was going to be there, so she could be surprised by her arrival as well. She explained how she showed up at the wine bar, one night after work, to talk to her friend and co-owner of the place to ask if it was possible for her to have eight days off and how they all already planned a shedule. 

Tobin was shocked and still a little incredulous. “B-But what about the company? The big day is in, like, two months, I can’t just leave. With everything we had to change after the call and all the stress—”

“The next meeting we have is in two weeks and you’ll be here by then. Your laptop is portable, you can do everything from there, baby” She said sitting on her girlfriend’s lap sideway and putting her arm round her neck “Beside, the CEO is such a good person, you know?” She asked retorically with a teasing tone.

Tobin laughed and nodded before hugging her close. “You have no idea how much this means to me, babe. Thank you so so much.”

“You’re welcome. I know how hard it was for you to be away from them for so long.”

“Yeah.” Tobin whispered close to her neck, still not letting her go. “I tried so hard to find some time but the company and the wine bar and then those stupid months in Florida—”

“I know, I know.” Christen nodded before pushing her slightly to look at her face. She smiled softly and brushed away the only tear on her cheek.

“I love you. I can’t believe I’m going home! You are so sneaky! Hold on, let me facetime Per!”

Christen stood up and laughed at her girfriend’s excitment, watching from a far while sipping her coffee.

“Per! Holy shit! I’m coming home!?” Tobin screamed and showed her the tickets, hearing her sister laugh in response.

“I know! You have to thank that smart girfriend of yours!”

After talking for a few minutes, she closed the call and got closer to her girfriend, slowly taking her coffee cup from her hand to put it on the table and start pulling her hand. “Let’s go.”

“Where?” Christen asked with furred eyebrows while standing up.

“Back to bed.” She replied like it was obviuos, without looking back and still walking hastily, dragging her by the hand.

The younger woman laughed and tried to stop her. “Tobs no! I need to shower and go to work.”

Tobin immediately stopped, turned around and hugged her waist pushing their bodies in the opposite direction, towards the bathroom. “Okay, let’s shower.”

And Christen couldn’t do anything but laugh at her childlike behavior and kiss her back, just as happy to be alive.

The week she spent at home flew by so fast that Tobin almost didn’t notice when the time to leave was already there. The only thing that confirmed that it was seven whole days in another state were how much she missed Christen and how this trip did nothing but reassure her that they weren’t meant to be apart, that she wanted nothing more than watch Christen interact with her nephews in real life, that all the things she hoped for when she was younger were already true and stable and that the future of their relationship was a little bit more certain in her heart after this week. And of course, she didn’t waste any time to spill all of her thoughts while they were laying in bed that night, minutes before falling asleep in each other arms for the first time in seven days. 

“I already knew, you know.” Tobin whispered while they were on their side, facing each other, with their hands softly interwined between them. “How important you and this place is for me. But the life I created here, so far away from home, was never because I was unhappy there. Even when I moved to other cities, I always considered New Jersey my only home. I love my family and I miss them all so much that when I started to consider this place my home as well, mostly thanks to you and the amazing people I found, I felt almost like I was replacing them or forgetting how much happy they make me. I know it sound stupid b—”

“No baby, of course it doesn’t.” Christen smiled and lifted their hands to kiss the back of Tobin’s.

“Well, this week helped me a lot. It made me realize what I deeply always knew: That I have them too, you know? That I’m lucky to have accomplished so many things that I always wanted here and I have them with me every step of the way. The fact that my family loves you already so much, that my mom asked me to facetime you while we were all cooking so they could spent time with you, the way my nephews talked about having you there for Christmas to play with the snow, the way they asked about you and us and the company, it made me so emotional because even if I knew that they think you’re amazing, watching those interactions in real life… I don’t know, it made everything feel even more real. And I needed that a lot because… well here’s my home. You’re a huge part of why I feel like I’m in the right place. I feel like.” Tobin sighed and shook her head unable to explain what she meant clearly. “Like, everything is falling into place and you’re what’s making all of this changes feel natural and inevitable.You are who I needed to love and be loved by to feel at home everywhere I go. That’s who you are to me.”

The younger woman just closed her eyes and let their foreheads touch. “Thank you.” She replied in a whisper, not trusting herself to say anything back but knowing that Tobin knew. She knew exactly what monumental question that sentence was the answer to.

And just as fast, the end of July came. The team knew there was a lot on the line. Those past months were almost entirely dedicated to create the perfect plan and the perfect way of presenting it to the S.O.L. association on the big day. Christen was trying her best to be strong and confident as always around the work place, giving motivational speeches, working a lot of hours and checking on everyone but Tobin could see right through her. She knew she was worried, she knew she always thought about the risks she was taking and the potentially wasted time and effort of everyone if things wouldn’t go well. She was the CEO, it was her responsibility to make the right choice for her company and even if she knew tha team supported this idea since the first time she talked about it, she decided to start. She was so ready to start something helpful for the people who needed it most, to be part of something bigger and special and worthy. Tobin knew all of it and it made her being confident and ready when she slightly squeezed her hand before walking in the room.

“We’re ready.” She said with a nod when Christen looked up at her.

“Let’s go.” The CEO said back with a nod before looking straight forward and letting go of her hand to walk in with their team behind them.

They all set at the big table, Christen and Tobin side by side, standing up when the S.O.L. members walked in and took a seat as well. 

Then it started.

And once again those hours flew by. Christen with her collected and professional attitude, started talking about their program and general work ideas followed by Tobin explaining the benefits and budgets of the operations. Statistics and diagrams were showed on the screen at their back, everyone listening and nodding, obviously proud of how well thought the plan was.

Then it was over.

And the members of the organization were looking at each other with a small smile before standing up to walk in another room and talk privately. It was just a few minutes later that they walked back in again to shake hands with them. They were the perfect company to work with, not a single doupt in their minds. Christen could barely believe it: They would work for a millions of dollars project to help people who were struggling. All of their work paid off. All the negative thoughts and fears that were trapped in the back of her head, completely disappeared. A huge part of her dreams as a woman, a CEO but mostly as a human being was becoming true. Became true right then and there. It wa almost too much.

When the S.O.L. members left with the promise to see each other soon, there was a lot of laughing and crying and cheering and hugging. The team set down for a few minutes, breathing in a proud and relieved silence. No one could stop smiling and looking around at the others incredulous faces. Allie stood up all of a sudden and clapped to get everyone’s attention.

“Well, since it’s technically our last day of work before summer break, I suggest a drink at our bar, both to celebrate this win and say goodbye to each other properly. What do y’all think?”

And, obviuosly, everyone stood up and cheered, happy to get out of the building and get a much derserved fun night. They made their way out talking loudly and laughing, and before they could start walking in the direction of the bar, one of the guys stopped, turned around to look at Christen that was a couple of step behind them and asked, almost screaming:

“Press, are you coming to the bar with us?”

There was a second of silence and Christen just shrugged and nodded with a smile. “Sure.”

At that, everyone cheered even louder, jumping around and raising their arms in the air, probably gaining some weird looks from the people walking down the street and Christen couldn’t do anything but shake her head at the all the enerrgy that didn’t leave their bodies yet and sink into the arm that Ali curled around her shoulder. “I love you, sweetie.” She whispered in her ear.

“I love you more, Ali.” She replied just as softly.

When they arrived at the bar, drinks were ordered and everyone was laughing and telling stories about those past months and houw stressful everyone was. Suddenly they decided that Christen, as the “boss” needed to make a speech (that she was pretty sure was only an excuse to drink more). So, surprising them a little bit, she took her glass of wine and stood up, deciding that it was the right time to say some things to those people that were so special to her and, hopefully, not too drunk yet.  
“Okay, Okay. You guys know I’m not that good with speeches outside of work but I’ll try because next month it’s the beggining of something huge and important for a lot of people. Everything the company is becoming is thanks to every single one of you and the dedication you put into your job. You could have refused this project, not having to work all of those extra hours, but you didn’t. You accepted the challenge with me and took the risk. I’ll never forget this moment and I’ll never forget the past five months. I hope you enjoy this free month from work before coming back in September, ready to start this new adventure together. I love and appreciate you as people and coworkers and I always will, so thank you. Really.”  
Everyone smiled and clapped, saying “We love you” and “Thank you” trying not to get emotional, knowing how true and genuine those words were, coming from Christen.  
Before sitting down the CEO took another deep breath and talked again.  
“And to you.” She said looking straight at Tobin that was sitting on the other side of the table, in front of her. “I…I just love you, Tobs” she confessed, laughing lightly at the way the older woman blushed, surprised to hear those words in front of their coworkers that were now looking at her with soft smiles. “You showed me what a partner is. You proved me that if you have a deep aspiration, a goal for your life, then your loving of others is part of this aspiration and not a distraction from it. You taught me that if you and your partner both want to do things to relieve the suffering in this world , then your love for each other is connected to your love for others, and it expands exponentially to cover all the aspects you want it to. Thank you for being by my side through it all, Tobin. Thanks for supporting me both as a lover and a coworker, for respecting my boundaries as an individual and pushing me to be better. Thanks for telling me who I am when I couldn’t see it and thanks for changing the answer. You are who I needed to love and be loved by too and you always will.”

When she finished, everyone at the table had teary eyes, smiling and nodding at Christen’s words. Tobin was wiping the tears on her cheeks that kept falling, and all the love and adoration she was feeling for the woman was making it really hard to say something, so she just smiled brightly, locking eyes with her girlfriend, knowing she knew what she was feeling and mouthed “I love you.”

After that Ali stood up raising her glass. “To Christen, and to the amazing woman and CEO she is. We’re so grateful for you and we’re proud of everything you’re doing.”

Everyone cheered and stood up, connecting their glasses in the middle before drinking and going on with the fun night. After a few hours, some of them started dancing, feeling like they weren’t ready to end the night and others decided to go home. Christen and Tobin said their goodbyes, hugging everyone and wishing them a good August, promising to keep in touch as mush as possible.  
When they walked out of the bar, they were met with the chill air of the night that made Christen shiver slightly. Tobin immediately hugged her waist and kissed her for the first time that day, knowing she wouldn’t do it around their coworkers and wanting a moment just for them. When they pulled away, they smiled at each other silently and started laughing, at nothing in particular.

“Let’s go home, babe” Tobin said, keeping an arm around her waist and letting Christen lean into her before kissing her head and walking home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know where to start...  
> When I started this story back in March, I had no idea how much things would change. It's been the hardest year ever for me and I'm still struggling so much that a part of me feels like I'm not the same writer I was when I started this and that's what made it so hard to finish it how I wanted and how I think it deserved to be. I know this year has been crazy for a lot of us and I hope you'll seek for help when your mental health gets worse.  
> To whoever is still reading this fic, to all the kudos and the comments and the kind messages you sent me: THANK YOU so much! I don't deserve any of it. I'm sorry if I made you wait too long and I'm sorry for all the little mistakes I made along the way. Now, looking back there are some things I would write really differently and maybe avoid a lot of grammatical slips.  
> I hope all this things didn't make your enthusiasm about this story fade.  
> I'll hopefully write an epilogue in the future (probably a long shot about a different time of their lives) and if you have any specific ideas/things you'd like to read about those two, l'm always happy to read your thoughts!
> 
> I hope you have a really nice day and as always, let me know what you think about this chapter!  
> Stay safe, guys and be kind! Bye!
> 
> -El.
> 
> p.s. A small part of the speech comes from an IG story C posted a while ago!


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